My husband and i always argue, we never agree on anything, I feel he treats me like a child {this might be because he is ten years older then i } he act like he nows everything when ever we get in a fight he threatans to run off with our baby and say " you'll get over it" he is a chest up he's the boss kind of guy. I am a stay at home mother who has no idea how to make this marriage better he blames me for everything and i am a very defensive person so i try to stick up for my self but i just turns in to a huge fight he gets mad at me when i excersise he thinks i am being selfish he calls me every bad name there is to call someone. I just dont know what to do he puts so much presure on me i fell like i am pulling all of the yolk what do i do ? what can i say to him to make it better ? HELP PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-02-05 03:15:58 · 9 answers · asked by chick4god 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
how do i tell a stubborn man to knock off his selfish ways
2007-02-05 08:16:10 · update #1
Sometimes, when a person has a self confidence problem, they compensate by being a bully. Keeping you on the defensive keeps you from learning his weaknesses.
It really sounds like he fears your strength and will try to tear you down to his level if you let him. My guess is that he will resist going to counseling as well because that would also reveal a part of himself that he doesn't like.
You are in a tough spot. Try the marriage counseling. Go alone if you have to.
His actions are a bad example for your child. You must decide if there will be more harm to the child in staying with the marriage or leaving with the child.
2007-02-05 03:30:07 · answer #1 · answered by lunatic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU need Dr. Phil.
Once your in a relationship where your being controled, you either put up with it or you smarten up and get out before it becomes a physical thing of abuse.
Most men think they know more than us women. It really pisses them off when they start to realize they have a lady with brains.
I suggest seperation for awhile. Get your head on straight and get a job ooutside the home. Let yourself experience that your a person with brains, and your capable of being without a over ego bastard.
Please do if for awhile, before your another lady on here screaming for help cause she was beat half to death.
2007-02-05 11:25:29 · answer #2 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him that you need to talk to him. Tell him how you feel and that you love him and want the marriage to work, but that he makes you feel really bad. If you have not communicated your feelings to him, he probably doesn't even know he's behaving so badly towards you.
You might suggest counselling too. Sometimes someone on the outside looking in can see things more clearly.
Best of luck to you.
2007-02-05 11:22:27 · answer #3 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband is 16 yrs older than me, and we argue a lot. I guess our age difference is a factor. Go to a good God , family centered councelor. Communicate with him. I know it is hard, but it is they key to a healthy relationship. Email me if you would like. glamourgirl720@yahoo.com is my address. I am currently going through something similar. I believe in the sanctity of marriage, but I know at times it can be overwhelming!!! Good luck!!!
2007-02-05 13:19:08 · answer #4 · answered by metalwife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need marriage counseling and help. Talk to your husband and tell him how you feel and why... Ask him to go get help for your marriage with you. You are not the only one to blame here.... You both need help... If he wont go for help then you go for help first. This may change things if he sees you start changing for the better. Also go to http://www.drphil.com and email them for help in this matter too!
2007-02-05 11:43:24 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Good-bye" is the only thing you can say to him to make it better. He obviously has no respect for you - you'd be better off without him. Your self-esteem will suffer if you spend anymore time in this relationship - it isn't healthy.
2007-02-05 11:38:39 · answer #6 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get marriage counseling - now. If he won't go, you should go by yourself. But go.
Then decide if you are better off with him, or without him.
2007-02-05 11:21:24 · answer #7 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no space in your relationship.Ignore each other for some time.Avoid arguments.
2007-02-05 11:21:18 · answer #8 · answered by ANU U 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your name is "chick4god" I am going to assume you are a "godly" woman???? Pray and get christian marital counseling!
2007-02-05 11:22:13 · answer #9 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋