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I have a busy body mother in law that has just been a problem for 10 years now. I have in turned moved 1 hour away from her to get away from it all but she still keeps on is thier any legiment advice out thier. please keep in mind i still want to keep peace with my husband.

2007-02-05 01:38:06 · 14 answers · asked by dirt77 3 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

14 answers

your husband needs to put you first ahead of his annoying mother. you are first, she is after you.

talk to him, tell him you've had enough and he has to put his foot down with her in a way that he doesn't offend her.

your a brave women to put up with this for so long.

2007-02-05 01:53:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Confrontation! Spell it out! Listen, I can understand what you have been doing, biting your tongue every time you want to smack her, but 10 years has given her no reason to stop. In fact it may have set a personality in stone. The ONLY way she will back off is for you to tell your husband that whether or not he helps YOU are going to confront her the very next time she "buts" in. He will of course say he will take care of it, but then he won't. I mean he's a guy! We hate confrontation. So make sure that you tell him ahead of time that it doesn't matter if he gets involved or not, YOU will not accept this behavior any longer. Then let her have it with everything you have! !0 years of biting your tongue should make for an interesting confrontation, wish I could be a fly on that wall!

2007-02-05 01:48:14 · answer #2 · answered by delux_version 7 · 0 0

Ok, I am speaking from experience!

You have to talk to your husband, and make it clear to him that he cannot share personal information about your relationship with his mother (or anyone)!!!! She can only get in if someone is letting her in! If you truly want to keep the peace with your husband, it is very important that you have this conversation with him and that you make him understand how important this is to you. If not, it will eventually destroy your relationship - believe me!

He needs and should have a relationship with him mother, but he needs to understand the do's and don't's when it comes to sharing information with her. What you and he are fighting over, or how much money is being spent, or how the two of you raise your children, are taboo subjects! Those are things that are personal and should be decided between the two of you exclusively. The less information shared, the less ammunition she will have to fire at you.

Good luck!

2007-02-05 01:59:52 · answer #3 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0 0

turn off phone,If she tends to call in the mornings then unplug it then, or evens same same, or turn down valume and let the maching do its job.
do not answer e-mails from her but once a week, do not give her your cell # if you did then get a new #.
How is she a busy body if no one tells her anything?? how can she be from an hour away.?? how is she keeping on???
Is your husband a dope and does not see her for what she is?? LEt him talk to her and only him for awhile, alway be busy when she calls go for an immediate walk right then and there oh bye time for my walk. see how he likes to be the only one to deal with her.

2007-02-05 01:51:25 · answer #4 · answered by picture 1 · 0 0

If your husband won't back you up, there isn't anything you can do besides be polite and chilly, don't invite or offer confidences. Its not just your problem its his too and if keeping the peace means that he chooses his mother over you then at least you know what order you are in in his life.

2007-02-05 02:21:02 · answer #5 · answered by justa 7 · 0 0

study and pastime both jointly good should be very tiring and then searching after the living house. Following suggestion would help. a million. it truly is larger you employ someone to look after your mom in regulation. 2. You cant change your mom in regulation so adjust to the problem. bypass out frequently for dates consisting of your hubby and enjoy existence. Watch action picture do issues that make you satisfied. 3 shop your self busy at living house, merely overlook about bitter words and bypass on, all and multiple has precise to speech. mom in guidelines are particular provide her some care, purchase her some outfits, take her out too and spot the version. best of success

2016-11-02 09:23:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I have been married for twenty years now. My mother in law used to drive me nuts. Until I gave her what she wanted. She soon figured out she didn't want to know all our business.

call her every day and grumble and gripe about every little thing that irritates you. husband kids politics what ever.

she will start avoiding your phone calls and avoiding calling you.

We now get along great. She only calls when she really has to.
believe it or not she didn't say a word to the hubby because I mostly complained about him lol.

They don't want to hear their little boys aren't perfect

2007-02-05 02:04:41 · answer #7 · answered by angie 4 · 0 0

You husband will have to talk to his mother about this.....you do need to have a serious conversation with him...and he needs to listen and then do something about it...I know....I have to do this with my own mother....she demeans everything I say and my husband says.....So I finally had to get ugly, because being nice was not getting through. I still have to say stuff to her from time to time.....but your husband will have to do this.....and not say "well Lucy has a problem with you being a busy body" or "well it is just getting on Lucy's nerves" unfortunately he needs to take it all himself and not put in on it....if he loves you he will protect you that way......good luck....it is not going ot be easy for him

2007-02-05 02:36:30 · answer #8 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 0 0

Just be firm but polite with her. When she tries to stick her nose in your business, politely tell her, "Thanks but I think I'll handle this my way. I appreciate your advice, though." Definitely try to keep the peace - this is his mother and you don't want to alienate both him and her. As long as time mother-in-laws have been like this to their daughters-in-law and there's little you can do other than stand your ground. Best wishes.

2007-02-05 01:48:23 · answer #9 · answered by §Sally§ 5 · 0 0

I think you need to have a serious conversation with your husband. It is his mother therefore it is his responsibility to talk to her and make sure that she knows the boundaries. You should have to do the same thing if your mother was causing him grief.

2007-02-05 01:41:13 · answer #10 · answered by peeps 4 · 0 0

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