He and his female boss stayed in a guest house for a night.when i called him late night i heard her voice in his room.she is a divorcee.when i questioned him after he came back he physically and verbally abused me.I have lost trust since then.I am not able to tolerate him.everytime i see him that incidence comes in my mind.what do i do?
2007-02-04 20:26:57 · 18 answers · asked by distressed 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Give him a strong warning and forget the incident and enjoy the married life. I hope he will not repeat the same if you forget the incident and moves happily with him.
2007-02-04 21:17:43 · answer #1 · answered by NUPAKRY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First keep ur mind cool. Ask him in a very polite way whether anything has gone wrong from ur side that he is ignoring u. As men's ego problem will never except their mistakes, they will also find that their wifes are guilty for whatever mistake he does. Find out excatly what had happend then come to a decision. Don't take any harsh decision without having ful information.
Best of Luck.
2007-02-04 23:16:10 · answer #2 · answered by sweetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things are not lost or gained like this in the life. Even if the decisions are negative then also it is advisable to act cautiously and with cool mind.
Please think with the cool mind and explore all the pros and cons before arising to a point. Do not hate it will only harm you even if you have decided to break be cool and discuss the matter in details with your confident friends and not In this public forum as yo will get more casual answers.
We Can discus out this but contact directly through this portal and giving your mail id
2007-02-04 22:51:26 · answer #3 · answered by Kamal K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel he has cheated on you! Feelings and emotions can play havoc on ones life if one does not haul them in and control them. You are not sure but you choose to believe the worst, hence you have no more trust for your husband? You assume the worst? Look at the wore assume. It makes an ..... (first three letters) out of ..u.. and ...me!
Im not saying they are innocent but what I am trying to tell you is that its is probable that nothing has happened and nothing will happen.
SO how does one deal with this? CHOOSE to override these feelings and emotions. Be positive and try to be confident in yourself. This means not fearing the worst or even giving in to that. What you fear will become real. Trust God with your husband. Pray for him. Get the book THe power of the praying wife but Stormie Omartian. This book will help you pray over him all the good things. The bible also says as a man confesses so is he. If you confess the good things over him, he will be protected by God at all times. I also pray that God will frustrate the plans of evil in my husbands life and it works. THe minute temptations face him, he backs off. He tells me this and that is how I know. Dont quit my friend. You have to begin to take action and now. Override negative feelings and choose the positive ones. Take all your thoughts captive and choose the ones that work for your benefit and throw out the bad ones. Dont listen to them.
Yes I know its not easy but if you want to save your marriage then my suggestion is that you work at it. Read the book LOVE AND RESPECT and with an open mind too. It is written by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. Do exactly what he tells you to do and see the change in your marriage.
Please dont fear this. It looks daunting but it is not as big a deal as you think it is! Choose to change your attitude. Instead go to him and say. Please forgive me for doubting you. I respect you and I repect ............................... about you and if you say you didnt have an affair with her then I will respect what you said as the truth.
If he did have an affair it will make him feel bad and the truth will come out. If he didnt he will maybe still be irritable but in time will soften towards you for your change of attitude. Once this is dealt with forget it and never again bring it up in conversation.
Show him you are accountable and trust him no matter what you feel. Remember you can very well feel the wrong things. Most women feel strange things while or before menstruation. Think about it! Now its up to you. One way or the other you have to choose!!!!!!
2007-02-04 20:55:36 · answer #4 · answered by uniquechild 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say.. As of now don't mention it again if his reaction is to hit you and talk crap to you. Take a hard look and realize that some men just give up on marriages. It sucks. If I were you I don't think I would hang around, The first time any man lays a hand on me I am out. I don't care if I have no money, I am gone. He will probably continue doing this, you shouldn't wait around for it just to get worse.
2007-02-04 20:33:47 · answer #5 · answered by ompie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time for divorce
File divorce papers before you speak with him again
You cannot trust many local blokes they will only abuse you more and make it worse
Off course you know the choice is yours and you alone face the consequences.
You will be influenced by lover, friend, relative, neighbours and even strangers but end of the day choice is yours. You make the choice and you face the consequences.
2007-02-05 19:40:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A Divorce! because he already disrespected you by verbally and physically abusing you.. If he wasnt guilty of anything he wouldnt of done that. Now if you tried to talk to him and he did that to you and you dont do anything hes going to continue doing what he wants to do and when you confront him hes going to abuse you again. The first time he did you should of left that way you can show him that your not going to take his bull crap. Dont let him control listen to your instinct dont be scared everything will be alright.
2007-02-04 22:24:47 · answer #7 · answered by chicamex 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of you have all the information you decide on, do not you? heavily. whether he exhibits up or not isn't the concern. . . he's speaking to a "female" inappropriately, and in case you sense this crosses the line (which in MY e book it does) then there is not any element in making it flow better and coming up extra drama the place there does not might desire to be any. you're pregnant. . . and your infant does not choose the strain of that variety of disagreement that's definite to reason super emotional upheaval. Your purpose might desire to be to shrink your rigidity at this element, and a disagreement will in no way try this. Kick him out of your place, or go away alongside with your infant. You deserve extra sensible. as quickly as a cheater, consistently a cheater, whether it is in basic terms emotional cheating online. it is the guy who's meant to be a function sort to your infants. do you decide on your daughter starting to be up seeing mommy paranoid for all time and seeing daddy disrespect his spouse? childrens do not deserve that.
2016-09-28 10:52:26 · answer #8 · answered by durrell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack your bags.
Your trust in him will likely never return, and especially the way he treated you for calling him out on it pretty much ensures that any hope of restoring or reconciling the marriage are pretty much toast.
Hell, if I were you i'd report the physical abuse to the police.
2007-02-04 20:31:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure you be able to get over this, but based on his response you should leave anyway-especially if he hit you. Any kids involved will make the decision tougher, but no one should put up with physical abuse. You take care and Good luck.
2007-02-04 20:33:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋