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I've been seeing him for 8 months, all while having to come home to my boyfriend of 9 years and my 2 year old daughter. Recently my mexican told me he has developed real feelings for me. And I have tried my hardest to make it work at home, even popped the question, only to be ignored, on numerous occassions. If I've been through this much, and can't get an I do out of him, Shouldn't I try to see what could happen between me and "Sancho"??

2007-02-04 11:23:38 · 22 answers · asked by T P 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

22 answers

You've been together for 9 years and you have a 2 year old daughter. That's a lot of history.
After being with someone for so long, when something/someone new comes along it tends to feel different, fresh and that could cloud your judgment.
Why would you be willing to risk your relationship not to mention the emotional term oil that follows a break-up just because a guy you've been dating tells you "he's developed feelings".
Before you make any decisions, but yourself in your boyfriends shoes. How would you feel if he came home on day and said that he's been cheating on you for the last 8 months and he wants to be with someone else.
It's hard to make it work at home when you already have someone on the side.
Make time to have a real serious conversation with your boyfriend...tell him why marriage is so important to you, after you get a genuine response from him,then make your decision about "Sancho".

2007-02-04 11:54:22 · answer #1 · answered by marnan97 2 · 0 0

"He was tired of his old grumpy wife" He was supposed to be the mature adult and FIX his MARRIAGE. Marriage is a serious commmitment and it's meant to be that way for a reason. He wasn't supposed to bring You along. "He wants me to move in but I'm unsure, his kids are 15 and 17 and mad at me and his ex wife is unstable and man" Wow, how could you want to be with a disrespectful husband? He should have gotten counseling and trying to fix his marriage. HE'S OLD for a reason! Don't get involved anymore. It's not healthy nor is it right. Even if it's hard, people will look at you wrong. I did this before and look how I turned up! Single and hurt!!!

2016-05-24 07:27:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I don't think that you are in a right state of mind to be getting married to any one. Does the MEX knows you have a relationship ? and do you really think that the best way to go is to get married just because MEX said he'd develop real feelings. I think it takes more than that specially when you have a daughter that you have to think on first.
*** Go get some therapy and speak to a pro, then sort out your realtionship with your b/friend of 9 years & I say then you take things the easy & slow way so you have time to think and reflectionate and MOST importantly time to give love to your doughter, then take it easy with MEX and see were does it take, there is no need to rush into anything the main priority in your life now needs to be your daughter.

2007-02-04 11:53:23 · answer #3 · answered by wanna_help_u 5 · 2 0

Number 1. It's wrong to cheat what makes you think that your "bf" of nine years doesn't know what you have been up to and just hasn't told you. Maybe that's why he ignored you when you popped the question.
Number 2. How do you know that this relationship with the "mexican" is going to work? How do you know that your not going to cheat on him like you did on your "bf".

2007-02-04 11:29:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Cheaters always loose so get ready you will get hurt in the end. If you leave for the Mexican give your child to the father . You don't know what kind of person your going to .It may all go up side down when you have to live with the other ,at least the child will have some stability in her life.

2007-02-04 11:43:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Let's see here......you say you have been with a man for 9 years, and he hasn't married you yet. Then you have a baby with a man who won't marry you after 7 years! Then you have an affair with a man you must refer to as a "mexican", which has nothing to do with your question. You come home to a man who still won't marry you, even though you had his baby, after sleeping with the "mexican". Can you spell STUPID!!! Forget about the men, and get yourself together.

2007-02-04 11:56:40 · answer #6 · answered by candace b 7 · 3 0

You and your boyfriend are over so I suggest the first thing to do is to get separated from him. You just have to tell him that you are in love with someone else and that you want him to leave. Then you will be free to see where your relationship with your lover goes. You cannot keep cheating because you will be found out.

2007-02-04 11:34:13 · answer #7 · answered by smilingtalker_au 4 · 0 0

It seems as if you do not know what you want. First of all you need to get your self together, and see where your head is at. Just to have someone say I DO! does not mean the marriage is going to work. Think about your daughter, and her future. work on yourself. And read books on self esteem.

2007-02-04 11:32:23 · answer #8 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 1 0

If you were not married or engaged, technically you were not cheating because there was nothing binding. If you left your BF, he might have to pay child support no matter what the reason is.

Only you can tell if you are in love. I am talking about obligations.

2007-02-04 11:44:02 · answer #9 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 0 0

If he's willing to cheat with you while you're in a relationship with your boyfriend, why would you think he would stay faithful to you later?

You need to really think about what you're looking for in a person and relationship. Plus you need to consider your daughter - how will she be effected by your future husband (whoever he is).

2007-02-04 11:30:32 · answer #10 · answered by juicyfruit 1 · 2 0

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