an older male role model in my life that i really like and look up to recently told me he's having a baby with his wife. i never thought he'd have kids. but now i just can't get my mind off of it and it actually had made me cry. i don't know why but i feel upset over the issue and i don't want to feel sad about it anymore. even thinking about him caring for a cute little baby makes me melt inside. i dont want to feel sad or even left out...but saying that makes me feel incredibly selfish. what can i do to just be happy for him and not be sad over the fact he's having a baby??
2007-02-04 11:06:49 · 6 answers · asked by Tani 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Sounds like you either "have feelings" for him or you are jealous because you want a baby. Just be happy for HIM AND HIS WIFE. Your turn will come, someday you'll have YOUR OWN spouse and child.
2007-02-04 11:17:22 · answer #1 · answered by Psalm91 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Do you feel upset over this because you maybe have some romantic feelings towards him you didn't realize you had? If he is strictly a male role model and father/brother figure, there shouldn't be any sad feelings over this. It sounds maybe that you think he will not be there for you as much now that a baby will be in the picture. And that is true. They are time consuming and he may not spend as much time exclusively with you. So, what to do? Be happy for him because he deserves to have a child with the woman he loves. Why not plan on spending alot of time with his whole family and offer to babysit when the baby is born. This way you get to see him as much but you also get to be around the baby he cares about. And I bet you'll bond with the infant, too, if you spend some time caring for him or her! Good luck.
2007-02-04 19:18:26 · answer #2 · answered by Gayle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Ting Err, in part but she really didn't go far enough. I would agree that you are most likely feeling that you will be left out from his attention once the child is born. That is really quite normal. Your out, to feel happy for him will be the decision that you make to be happy for him. You can also reverse this for your own benefit by being there for him. He may very well begin to feel left out as the baby begins to take up more of his wife's time. Being available to just listen to him will be a major help for him because he will need someone who will just listen. Your point of view, and understanding both his feeling of being left out, and her need to care for the baby will be a plus that neither one of them have really thought about, much less planned for. Hang in there and wait things out. I believe that you'll find that you will have a friend for quite awhile to come. While you are at it, do expand your base of people you look up to. Having a good mix of friends and people to draw on for answers will do you a lot of good.
2007-02-04 19:26:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you a guy? If so, that's explains alot of things. It might be jealousy. If so, I don't think you can look up to him anymore as a "role model" because how can you hate(dislike) your role model? That's weird! Maybe just look for another role model, one you're not jealous of. And don't worry, kids aren't all that great! Enjoy yourself! You might find out in the end that you really don't need to look up to anyone but God!
2007-02-04 19:23:55 · answer #4 · answered by Suzy Suzee Sue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Walker Texas Ranger
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZjXva-LhOA
2007-02-04 19:11:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you like him and you think that his attention will be on his new born soon, so you feel left out
2007-02-04 19:09:42 · answer #6 · answered by Ting Err 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋