The terrific terrible time portal
“Ahhhhhhh”! Screamed Hazel. She was lost but where. Hazel walked further in to the dark deep cave. Then suddenly there was a flash of light but what was it Hazel wondered. There was a big flash of light and Hazel saw a time portal. she thought she go through the time portal.
When Hazel got through the time portal she was this world where everything made out of cushions. Hazel walked on and there in front of her eyes. She saw this person made out of a big blue square cushion. the person was tall with big eyes and looked friendly.
The person asked Hazel “do you want to come to my place”
Hazel replied “yes please”
When they got there the house was this big fat sparkling cushion which could talk.
“My name is casino what is yours” said casino
“My name is hazel casino” said hazel nervously
After hazel hold told casino her name, the windows exploded flinging casino out as well. Hazel was scared what could she do? Hazel ran as fast as the wind to catch the lorry. The lorry had casino in it.
When the lorry got to it destination the men took casino out of the lorry. They started un stitching him. But then Hazel came to the rescue she got the men and beat them up. There was a Punch, Bang, Crash and clatter.
When all that was over Hazel drove the men’s lorry back to casino house and Hazel stayed there over night, in the morning hazel woke up with a surprise as, all of casino friends were they having a leaving party. as soon as the party was over Hazel left.
While she was going through the time portal. There was a sudden flash ,Hazel was back in the museum With all of here her friends. There teacher miss honey was worrying so much for Hazel to come back.
On the way home on the bus Hazel told her friend about her adventure and they said
“Don’t be silly hazel you were never gone”
Said Hazel friend. Was Hazel adventure real or was it just a dream.
2007-02-04 06:47:16 · 5 answers · asked by bratz2228 2 in Education & Reference ➔ Homework Help
Ahhhhhhh”! Screamed Hazel. She was lost but where? Hazel walked further into the dark deep cave. Then suddenly there was a flash of light but what was it? Hazel wondered. There was a big flash of light and Hazel saw a time portal. She thought she would go through the time portal.
When Hazel got through the time portal she was in this world where everything was made out of cushions. Hazel walked on and there in front of her eyes, she saw this person made out of a big blue square cushion. The person was tall with big eyes and looked friendly.
The person asked Hazel “Do you want to come to my place?”
Hazel replied “Yes please”
When they got there the house was this big fat sparkling cushion which could talk.
“My name is Casino what is yours?” said Casino.
“My name is Hazel, Casino” said Hazel nervously.
After hazel hold told Casino her name, the windows exploded, flinging Casino out as well. Hazel was scared. What could she do? Hazel ran as fast as the wind to catch the lorry. The lorry had Casino in it.
When the lorry got to its destination the men took Casino out of the lorry. They started unstitching him. But then Hazel came to the rescue. She got the men and beat them up. There was a Punch, Bang, Crash and clatter.
When all that was over, Hazel drove the men’s lorry back to Casino's house and Hazel stayed there over night. In the morning, Hazel woke up with a surprise, as all of Casino's friends were leaving a party. As soon as the party was over Hazel left.
While she was going through the time portal, there was a sudden flash. Hazel was back in the museum with all of her friends. There teacher, Miss Honey, was worrying so much for Hazel to come back.
On the way home on the bus, Hazel told her friend about her adventure and they said “Don’t be silly Hazel. You were never gone.” Was Hazel's adventure real or was it just a dream?
2007-02-04 07:07:29 · answer #1 · answered by PH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A very exciting story. Be careful to capitalize people's names.
See below:
Ahhhhhhh”! Screamed Hazel. She was lost. She but where. Hazel walked further in to the dark deep cave. Suddenly there was a flash of light. What but what was it? Hazel wondered. There was a big flash of light and Hazel saw a time portal and decided to go through it.
When Hazel got through the time portal she found herself in a world where everything was made of cushions. Hazel walked on and there before her eyes, was a person made of a big blue square cushion. The the person was tall with big eyes and looked friendly.
The person asked Hazel, “Do you want to come to my place”
Hazel replied, “Yes please.”
Hazel found the house was a big fat sparkling talking cushion.
“My name is Casino, what is yours?” Said Casino.
“My name is Hazel, Casino,” said Hazel, nervously.
After Hazelhazel hold told Casino her name, the windows exploded flinging Casino out. Hazel was scared. What what could she do? Hazel ran like the wind to catch the lorry. The lorry had Casino in it.
When the lorry got to it destination the men took Casino out of the lorry. They started unstitching him. But then Hazel came to the rescue, she grabbed the men and beat them up. There was a Punch! Bang! Crash and clatter.
Afterwards, Hazel drove the men’s lorry back to Casino house and Hazel stayed there over night. In the morning, Hazel woke up with a surprise. All of Casino friends were they having party. When the party was over, Hazel left.
While she was returning through the time portal, there was a sudden flash. Hazel was back in the museum with all her friends. There teacher Miss Honey was very worried and hoping Hazel to come back.
On the way home on the bus, Hazel told her friend about her adventure and they said
“Don’t be silly Hazel, you were never gone.”
Said Hazel’s friend.
Was Hazel adventure real or was it just a dream?
2007-02-04 07:26:15 · answer #2 · answered by Stan M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
casino
“My name is hazel casino” said hazel nervously
Capitalize Hazel Casino, and Hazel again,
Punch, Bang, Crash
Do not have to be capitalized.
While she was going through the time portal. There was a sudden flash
Between portal and there, there should be a comma, and there shouldn't be capitalized.
When all that was over Hazel drove the men’s lorry back to casino
Insert a comma between over and Hazel.
Hazel replied “yes please”
Place a comma between yes and please.
“Ahhhhhhh”!
The exclaimation mark should be inside of the quotation marks.
I'm not doing your homework for you, if your smart enough to write this, then your smart enough to edit it. It's not that hard. Spelling and conventions needs a lot of help.
read it aloud and see if it sounds right, if it doesn't (which it won't) then something isn't right.
2007-02-04 06:56:02 · answer #3 · answered by thats_hot_097 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a LOT of punctuation help. I'm not about to do your homework for you.... Some suggestions: When a sentence is a question, it should end with a question mark. A proper name, Hazel, should ALWAYS have a capital "H"... Re read it out loud. Where you hesitate in a sentence, think about adding a comma (,). It's not badly written, just badly punctuated....
2007-02-04 06:53:33 · answer #4 · answered by Patricia D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am not readin all dis ****
2007-02-04 06:54:14 · answer #5 · answered by latrell0132 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋