How do i console a friend?

Question

I've just found out that a friend of mines 25 year old brother was killed last night whilst getting out of a taxi!!! I dont know what to say to her that will comfort her... She said 'Its not meant to be like this'

Answer 1

theres nothing that you can say to relieve her pain. just be there her and let her vent and cry and do what she has to to accept and grieve and move on.
just be there.

Answer 2

Nothing you say will ease the pain of losing a loved one, just be there for her. Let her cry on your shoulder, let her talk about him, send her some flowers and tell her how much you love her, and that you are there if she needs you.

There are no words that can comfort at this time, I know from experience - I lost my dad 8 years ago and I cant think of a single thing anyone said that actually helped, but having my friends around to talk/cry with did help. Just remember that birthdays and christmas are gonna be hard for the first couple of years, it brings all the memories flooding back, and can be difficult to cope with, especially xmas as everyone is happy and celebrating, I remember feeling so angry with everyone the first xmas after losing my dad, I had lost the most important thing in the world to me, and people were laughing and joking and singing and carrying on as normal. It was very difficult to deal with.

Let her lead the way, people deal with grief in very different ways, some openly howl and cry, others keep it in and try to push it to the back of their mind, they just dont want to be seen to be not coping.

all the best, its a hard situation to be in, just treat her as you would like to be treated yourself.

Answer 3

it is a very hard situation i lost my cousin i n a road accident last year my friends were so good to me they all phoned me and text me to say they were thinking of me my 2 best friends came around and hugged me and said if i needed to shout cry scream or laugh they would be there for me i knew i could rely on them just be there for your friend tell her that you will always be there and if she needs anything you will be there be a good listener that is an important part of grieving and when the months go by still ask how she is dont think because the time is going by that she is better my friends still ask how i am and now how i am feeling there are some web sites your friend could look at when she feels up to it she can see she is not the only one going through that awful tradgedy pass on my condolences and tell her to keep strong it isnt easy but she will get through it

Answer 4

this is so tragic and we have been in a similiar situaion as yourself recently, at the moment there is realy nothing that anyone can do or say that will make this lady feel better, apart from being there when she wants you there and not being there when she wants to be alone, you could perhaps find her a bereavement counsellors tel no and leave it for her for if or when she needs it. alot of people in this situation tend to not talk about the deceased person cos they think it may be too painful for the loved ones left behind but it will help her talking about good times they shared so you could perhaps do that with her or listen while she talks about him. i wish you and her all the best x

Answer 5

Jules In lost my mum 4 weeks ago, and my friends were there for me in every way, phone or text her, just say your thinking of her, maybe suggest in a few days time to go for a walk, just to get her out of the house. maybe invite her to yours. Her grieve will be painful and people deal with grieve in different ways. She may not want to speak to anyone. You may feel she needs space, but don't forget her, send a card or flowers. My grieve is still so raw and painful, but my friends have been great.

Answer 6

Sometimes saying nothing is worse than saying something. You are her friend and she does need support and friends should be there for friends. Be candid with her and tell her that you're there for her and anything you can do for her just ask. Tell her that you're so sorry to here about her brother. Just being there for her will help her through this.

Answer 7

Sorry but there is no consolation that will reduce the sorrow and shock for your friend. All you can do is be there when she wants you, but you must let her grieve in private. I know, since I have lost a husband to cancer, and then a dear partner to a fatal heart attack.

Answer 8

The worst thing you can do is try and think of something to say, as you possibly, and hopefully, have not had to experience this yourself. Just be there for her, make her endless cuppas and make sure she keeps her strength up during the funeral. Hope she gets through this. x

Answer 9

Wow. That sounds somewhat undesirable. i will save you in my prayers. i could recommend telling him it has not something to do with him, if the only element he's rather stricken approximately is that she cheated on him. (in my opinion, i think of i could be stricken extra by the actuality that she dedicated suicide, yet consistent with probability not be able to admit it to myself yet, simply by fact it is so undesirable.) some human beings only opt to have 'relaxing' and don't likely be attentive to a thank you to love. i'm not asserting that grew to become into definately her, even nevertheless it would desire to be why she cheated on him. i could only save praying, and consistent with probability use this as an commencing for telling him that a courting with Jesus is the final variety you're able to have, and Jesus will in no way go away you. His love is extra sensible than any human's. i could invite him to Church, and if that doesn't artwork, see in case you may get a DVD of an extremely solid sermon, in the adventure that your Church makes them. My Church does, and that they are in basic terms a dollar each, so as that would desire to be an decision if there is an argument approximately not wanting to definitely flow to the Church itself. God bless! :)

Answer 10

you just need to be there for your friend in her time of need. you should lat her grieve and vent her anger how she needs to i.e crying,shouting,screaming.just being there to hold her will be a great comfort to your friend and if she needs to constantly talk about her brother then just listen

Answer 11

Just be there for her when and if she needs you. She will need you in the lead up to the funeral and after. It hits most people like a ton of bricks after the funeral so my advice to you is just to be her rock and be there for her.