i love a gal so much....she also loves me..but her parents wont agree...i hav talked with my parents..her paretns wont agree as she is from different city n diferent caste.....wel i want to talk to her parents...wel she loves me..but she doesnt want to go against her parents(as if she comes with me her parents wil split for sure)
there are two case.....
if her parents wil say no(which is for sure,,,,no doubt abt that)
1.she wil come with me..her parents wil most probably split....she wil b with me witout a soul
2. she wil b get married to some one else her parents decide..i wil b without life....
please help me out...
2007-02-04 00:17:46 · 8 answers · asked by buddy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i m here only..ask e me if u hav any thing to ask...
2007-02-04 00:22:42 · update #1
wel its nt being together..if she wil b with mewithout soul..n her family shattered..is it rite thing...i m unable to think anything...
2007-02-04 00:24:13 · update #2
wel i m nt givin up...but i knw her parents they wil never agre.as soon as i talk with her parents..they wil jus pul her back from her job,.........n she wil b married to soem one else within few days....
2007-02-04 00:29:19 · update #3
wel i m nt givin up...but i knw her parents they wil never agre.as soon as i talk with her parents..they wil jus pul her back from her job,.........n she wil b married to soem one else within few days....
2007-02-04 00:29:40 · update #4
i cant help caste system..can u help me??
2007-02-04 00:31:30 · update #5
wel we r independent....but when she wil marry me goin against her paretns..she wil b with me without her heart..she wil feel guilty as that wil break the relation ship between her parents(her father wil never talk with her mother).....she wil with my wihtout her mind....n her parents wil nver forgive her....
2007-02-04 00:34:24 · update #6
wel she is in another city from her native..i m in another city from both o the cities (her parents,n her)
2007-02-04 01:32:38 · update #7
i am stil waitin for answers..
2007-02-04 17:14:39 · update #8
From what I understand, there is a strict guideline to the caste system..
But those are only guidelines and rules are meant to be broken when it comes to love.
2007-02-04 00:54:24 · answer #1 · answered by Andy L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your writing says "I am a lazy person." Now add to it the fact you obviously aren't listening! She is from a different CITY. Her parents regard her being in your city as temporary, they didn't bring her up to never see her once she got married. Have you considered moving to her parents city? As for the caste thing, if it's not such a big deal then why haven't you spoken to the parents?
How do you know it's just "her" parents where the problem lies? It might rest in part with your parents too! I suspect you will say this can't be true because they are a higher caste than her parents, which is exactly the problem. The fact is, this attitude on the part of your family was very obvious to her family, they may not know you, but they will have a pretty good idea on how well you have been educated!
Why should her parents agree to her marrying someone who presents themselves in public as "uneducated"? If you don't believe me take a copy of your question and put into Microsoft Word and do a spelling and grammar check.
They have spent a lot of money to give her a good education, and then along comes an "uneducated loafer" who wants to marry their daughter and make it so they never see her again.
I think you and your parents have already made a big mistake by adopting this attitude, but you could try and make amends.
My advise is to approach her parents remembering you are a potential son in law, not a person of a higher caste. If they aren't happy with you, and I suspect they aren't (why should it surprise you), and this lady means so much to you, you will need to show them you are the genuine caring person they would like their daughter to marry. You will probably need to "lower caste" as well.
You both will have to consider moving to her parents city and you will need to get a job there so they can see you truly love their daughter and aren't going to take their daughter away.
Whatever you do, DO NOT mention "caste" to them, or even hint it unless they bring it up.
2007-02-04 09:12:20 · answer #2 · answered by Bad bus driving wolf 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a Romeo and Juliet movie.....When one is controled by parental guidance, it is difficult to please both sides and the last thing you want to do is to be disconnected from the family ties. Very often, culture and caste systems seem to be strong in determining the 'fate' of a couple...
I think that if you both are independant and mature enough to make a decision, then your love will seal the marriage and that is what is most important. But it sounds to me like your girlfriend will eventually comply to her parents as her fate seem to be in their hands . So you would not have much of a choice. Try talking to them again and find out the reasons why they dislike you??? If all attempts fail then the decision will have to come from both you and your girlfriend. Only you will know the situation and take action on it....Only you know what is best for yourselves. But be prepared for the worse and what you would want to do about it....good luck....
2007-02-04 08:31:20 · answer #3 · answered by singirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...Buddy? You are romantisizing love all out of proportion. Perhaps you should read all about what causes attraction, love feelings effect on the brain etc....so you can gain perspective FIRST.
http://homepage.mac.com/helenfisher/Sites/articlespage/a2.htm
There are no one true loves....so many possibilities. If she doesnt want to upset her parents, she's not ready to leave and make adult decisions for herself. She may never be......often women use parental intervention as an excuse (ie its not me, its them) to get out of a situation they dont really want....especially if they fear your reaction if they told te truth. You seem hell bent on dying if she doesnt love you...so I cant say I blame her.
Rejection isnt the end of the world....love and feeling love returned is just natures way of showing you the joys of bonding....so that you will realise that life has meaning...not for ONE but for whoever you eventually connect with that suits you better. You WILL love many before you get to 100 years old.
If dying is on your agenda you MUST realise that this is an immature way of dealing with life.....which means you are not ready yourself to have a mature and loving relationship.....so you need to let go of her and grow more emotionally...NOT GIVE UP! Love yourself more, so you are ready the next time love comes along. Study buddhism a bit.....and learn the noble truths of life....acceptance or the meaning of life;
http://users.aristotle.net/~diogenes/meaning1.htm
2007-02-04 08:40:40 · answer #4 · answered by Scully 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is almost Romeo and Julietish you have life long discession to make. I do not envy that the caste system will determine your fate.Do you honor tradition or do you break with your culture and become more modern in your culture. very difficult in order to pass your cultures history down also depends on the caste system.
2007-02-04 08:26:59 · answer #5 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi,
try a united front the two of you go to her family and talk. stay calm when you talk to them because they will try to separate her from you to make her do as they want,so you have to keep her with you. explain to them how you feel and how hare it is in this day and time to really fall in love.remind them of Romeo and Juliet stories all over the world and how they have turned out. believe me when i say that there are those king of stories nearly in every country. tell them hoe much the two of you care for each other,hoe much the two of you respect each other.
2007-02-04 08:41:54 · answer #6 · answered by Sonya K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awwwww you poooor thing ok what you do is...
you go to her parents and tell them just what you typed and more if you have to tell them your heart.. that will work for sure.. what ever you do DONT GIVE UP...
2007-02-04 08:25:06 · answer #7 · answered by lvn the rodeo... 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you two love each be together
2007-02-04 08:21:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋