My name or his?

Question

I am pregnant and my boyfriend and I were discussing whose last name the baby would have. We plan on getting married eventually. We want a wedding, but right now we need to focus our money on the baby.

Answer 1

it has to be his or he will have to adopt his own child once you are married we was told this because we wasn't married when we had our first child

Answer 2

Jeese wot year are we in?? Its 2007 ppl!! I'm damn annoyed at the person saying ur child will be a bastard i mean seriously get a life!! Give the baby ur name and then when u get married the baby's name can change! Who-ever said the father has to then adopt his own child is simple!! That is not the case. Congratulations on ur pregnancy girl!! Ur in a COMMITTED and loving realationship with a new baby on the way so enjoy! I am with my fiancé 7yrs now and am 28wks pregnant wiv our first child (more to come hehe) we've been engaged for 3yrs now with no signs of a wedding anytime soon!! Unless that is anyone out there has the money to pay for it????? Didnt think so... Until then the baby is having my name then his if/when we find the money to pay for our wedding :-) Hate when ppl think that because ur pregnant then u HAVE to get married i mean come on they can't be serious!!!!

Answer 3

Not that you want to mention this to your boyfriend, as to what your reason would be if you choose to use your name, but I'd say you've got to ask yourself if you really REALLY & truly believe that you'll get married, and that you're getting married because you love eachother and belong together & trust eachother, not because you're having a baby together. If that's the case, then you should seriously consider his last name. Unless there's a chance he will take your last name when you get married (it's uncommon, but it does happen...).

If you're not 100% sure about the marriage thing, then you may wish to consider your own last name. Personally, my son (due any day now) is going to have my boyfriend's last name, we plan to get married too, but even if we don't get married someday, I want him to have his father's last name as a reminder to him that his father loves him no matter what happens between us. I personally will never let my son forget that I love him, but because I can only control my thoughts & actions and not my boyfriend's I would be concerned that he may think just because mommy & daddy don't love eachother, maybe one of us doesn't love him, and since I won't let him believe I don't love him, I'm afraid that role could fall on his father without us intending it to. Does that make sense?

Also, I would try to consider both last names when choosing a first & middle name...if the name you pick sounds great with your last name, and then you get married and change your child's name to match yours & your husbands and the names sound "wrong" together, you may have some regrets...

You're smart not to rush into your wedding right now, no matter what the reason, be it money or just needing more time...if you're meant to be together, waiting 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years or 20 years won't make the slightest difference.

Congratulations on your coming little one too!

Answer 4

Well you can do what but i would put the child's last name as his cause after all that is what your child is (whatever the fathers last name). At the time when my child i was not married at the time to my son's father. I did put my son's last name as his.
We have been together since we were 15 years old and we had our son at age 21 and got married at age 26 (now 27). Even though you do put his name on the birth certicate at the hospital it will not go through to the state until it is run by the county attorney in which both parties agree on paternity and then the fathers name will be put on the real birth certicicate. So see my husbands name was not put on my sons birth certicate until he was 6 months old.
But the one they give you at the hospital had his name on it.
If your going to be together or not your child should have his fathers last name for many different reasons including that he will know his fathers side of the family if things should not go great with the 2 of you.

Answer 5

Since you are with the father of the baby and he is going to be involved in the little ones life, then I think he should take the daddy's last name. You said you will marry him eventually, so you three should share the same last name.

Answer 6

I would put his. I am kinda in the same position as you, except I already know that my baby will have my boyfriends last name. If you plan on getting married then go with his. Either way your boyfriend will still be his/her father, even if you break up, but if you get married your name will change (unless of course you keep your maiden name).

Answer 7

You can always change the baby's last name later if you are to marry the guy. Think about it and hard is this the peron that you are going to spend the rest of your life with? Are you going to want to answer the question of why your child has a different last name if you are not with the guy?

Answer 8

Personally, I would go with his last name. Especially if you both choose to get married down the road. This would also void out a lot of paper work that might be waiting for you down the road when you chose to have his last name for your child.

Answer 9

I don't know where GraceP lives or who told her her husband would have to adopt their son if he took his mother's last name but someone really fouled up on that one. As long as the father's name is on the birth certificate he wouldn't have to adopt his own child, regardless of who's last name they used. If that were true then a mother going by her maide name would have to adopt her own child at birth if the child were to have the father's last name and I've never seen that happen either.

Answer 10

until you are married let the baby take no name because it is not fair both ways.or you can mix your name and see what comes out just until you are married

Answer 11

i am in the EXACT same situation as u and i am giving the baby (hopefully a HER) my last name. its no problem to change the babys name as long as u do it the same time as you do yours when u get married. if u wait and change urs and the baby's seperately then its a hassle.