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If we are both equal, then why do people use phrases like "young ladies are not supposed to...." and "that's only for little boys, not girls"

2007-02-03 17:31:40 · 8 answers · asked by Koko Butta Kream 4 in Social Science Sociology

8 answers

I didn't raise my three children differently.

Right from the beginning my aim was to raise them as humans first. I did try to encourage them to like their gender, but "encouraging them to like what they happened to be" and treating them differently/raising them differently two completely different things.

My belief was always if you raise little humans who like who they are their genders will take care of themselves at that time of adolescence when gender pretty naturally asserts itself.

They're grown now, well balanced, appropriately "masculine" or "feminine" (depending on whether the person in question is one of my sons or my daughter) - and my approach worked pretty well if I do say so myself.

In all seriousness, if children are raised with emphasis on their gender and with preconceived ideas about what that gender ought to do and be, they are short-changed when it comes to developing that balance that makes a person of either gender a whole human. They're also short-changed when it comes to having all types of intelligence nurtured.

What so few people seem to realize is that gender (for most children at least) is such a fundamental part of a child's being parents generally don't need to fear that if they don't emphasize and nurture one gender or the other in superficial ways that the child's gender won't assert itself when the time comes.

A child who nurtured in a way that is aimed at nurturing a human first and who is helped to like who he is and what he is will naturally associate that human he is with the gender he is; and it all works out pretty well as far as I've seen.

2007-02-03 18:45:16 · answer #1 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 3 0

Some of it is stereotypes ingrained into our minds from when we were children, and some of it is simply because boys and girls are different. There have been experiments done where a set of children, both boys and girls, were raised exactly the same. They played with asexual toys, were dressed asexually, were disciplined the same, etc. When they placed all these children in a room with a whole bunch of gender specific toys, the results were very interesting. Most of the boys went right for the trucks and laser guns while the girls went for the dolls and playhouses. There is something that goes even deeper then simple upbringing that makes us who we are. On a genetic level boys and girls are different, in fact, a boy has more genetically in common with a male chimp then he does with a girl. This shouldn't surprise anyone, the boy has an entire chromosome that is different. This isn't bad, it isn't good, it simply is. They are different, but equal. They respond differently to how we raise them, it is only natural that we raise them as separate individuals.

2007-02-03 18:00:06 · answer #2 · answered by wordweaver_three 4 · 2 0

This is something lasting from the times when human society was still in the primitive stages. Not to say we're possibly still in that stage, but males and females were simply expected to be different because they are genetically different. Males tend to have more testosterone, which has masculine qualities and females estrogen with the feminine qualities, and society just decided what method of raising the person would fit best for their hormones and birth sex.

2007-02-03 17:38:38 · answer #3 · answered by onlyoneinall 2 · 1 0

nicely, i'm a mom of four, 2 boys, and a pair of ladies, 17 365 days previous boy, 12 365 days previous female, 7 365 days previous boy and 3 365 days previous female. the basics of parenting are the comparable, love, being concerned, potty education, self-discipline ect.... yet you besides might might desire to examine the features of the newborn, and there character. There are ameliorations in elevating each infant, whether or not they're the two a boy or a female. There are not any 2 infants alike. My oldest, grew to become into an exceedingly self sustaining infant, he needed in basic terms a sprint extra self-discipline, he have been given into each little thing!!! . Now my 2d infant, she has been completely self sustaining considering that start, she hated grass, bugs, each little thing!!! Now my 0.33, grew to become into the comparable simply by fact the 1st, he has a warm head!! Now my final, is a spit fire, she gets into each little thing and is as clever as my little boy and he or she is only 3!! i think what i'm asserting is, the newborn facilitates you come to a determination how they are going to be raised and who they are going to be. desire this facilitates.

2016-09-28 09:49:16 · answer #4 · answered by benisek 4 · 0 0

it is the way we are taught by society. Even young infants are brought up differently by gender. A male child is taught to be tough and not show emotions. To stand up and fight , a little girl however, is encourged to express feelings and show emotions. Even if this is not a parents intention small children are conditioned at a very young age to behave in certain ways according to their gender.

2007-02-03 17:41:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Discrimination persists. So the correct way is to push for legislative correction. On a practical level, get the men to wear cosmetics. Get the girls to stop painting the faces and wear only pants. And stop grumbling like a woman as a first step. Then all will be equal.

2007-02-03 17:50:27 · answer #6 · answered by Lee T 1 · 0 1

tradition. thats how our grandparents were brought up, they passed it on to our parents and it just goes on. and the other thing is people cry out for equal rights etc, but then you find those same people getting all pissed of when their boyfriends dont open their car doors, or they dont buy them roses or something like that. if people really want equality, then they should be willing to change as well. things wont change if people keep on screaming equality, but cant open their own car doors. and also little boys dont cry, let kids be kids and maybe one day things will change.

2007-02-03 18:02:00 · answer #7 · answered by firefly 3 · 1 0

I raise my girls and son the same, but I realize my daughters are tougher than my son. Men are different than women.
I believe girls and women are a lot more tougher by nature and i feel the need to pull away from my son more to teach him to be as tough as my daughters are. Society will be hard on a soft easy going male, his heart and head is not equipped to be as adjusting as a female. So being taught to be tough is all boys have to be sent out into the world to compete. I think my male friends are just more lovable and puppy like than my female friends, so I think there is a reason to be tougher on boys. On the other hand I thinks girls will be tough and challenging naturally.

2007-02-04 07:20:43 · answer #8 · answered by katy 1 · 0 2

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