This guy I worked with I became friends with.. but he slept with a girl who I liked. He has a girlfriend for 8 years now and she still doesn't know what he did.. I now have the ability to email her if I wanted (I found it out). Should I out him to her? I just don't like him and I think id be happier to ruin his life.
2007-02-03 15:43:46 · 51 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why does he get to live like a king and I have to sit back and watch?
2007-02-03 15:49:25 · update #1
After all HE was wrong
2007-02-03 15:49:34 · update #2
Yes I will do it anonymously.
2007-02-03 16:07:09 · update #3
Get over it. Don't stoop to lower levels to feel good about yourself.
2007-02-03 15:46:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I almost want to say yes, go ahead and out him. However, when people are willing to cheat, I have learned from experience that they almost always self destruct over time. They will either get caught, become heartless in their relationship or be outed by someone. Guilt always plays on their heartstrings too.
If you don't like this guy and you'd be happy to ruin his life, why are you calling him an old friend? Friends don't ruin each others life.
It clearly sounds to me like this guy is NOT your friend but more of an acquaintance so this shouldn't be your reservation.
BEFORE you out this guy and put a roadblock in his relationship you should think about the repercussions against you first. You will be successful in screwing up his relationship but it is an 8 year old relationship... if you screwed up my 8 year relationship I can assure you I would make your life a living hell. I'm sure you're thinking you'll out him anonymously, if so, that should work.
As I get older, I'm 27, I believe in Karma more and more. Good things and bad things always seem to come back at ya. Good luck!
2007-02-03 15:58:56 · answer #2 · answered by webaddict 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At the risk of sounding like an idiot, why would you tell her? Honestly, this guy's relationship with his girlfriend is between those two, not all three of you. Yeah, he slept with the girl you like and that makes you mad. So he is not a friend to you, at least not anymore, so why waste your time getting mixed up in his business?
You can move forward with your life and find another girl. Don't worry about him. He now has to juggle two girls and the consequences, and I assure you there will be consequences, there always is.
Let this girl find out what her boyfriend has been doing behind her back on her own. It sucks to find out bad news from someone who wants revenge and is watching it all from the sidelines. Just walk away. He made a mess of his life, you don't need him to risk making a mess of yours.
2007-02-11 08:36:44 · answer #3 · answered by Shorts 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The girlfriend deserves to know that her boyfriend has been cheating on her. However, VENGEANCE is a sorry motive for telling her this, because it feels like the intention is to hurt rather than help someone.
If your goal is to hurt someone, you should leave the situation alone.
If you genuinely care about how he is treating his girlfriend, and believe that she should have all of the information so she could make appropriate decisions for her well-being, then you should tell her about the cheating.
You will encounter a lot of people who will do things that you don't like or that you find hurtful. Revenge really isn't the solution, and often times comes back to hurt you more than satisfy you. I really think you should find more productive and adaptive ways of dealing with your negative feelings.
2007-02-03 15:55:28 · answer #4 · answered by ms_lain_iwakura 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I slept with this girls man and would spend time with him and her child. The reason: revenge.
A couple years back she lost my dog after I let her stay in my home when she was down on her luck and just blew off not looking for my dog because it was raining. I kicked her out.
the next time I saw her she had a man and a baby and I knew the guy was into me so I started to ask him to come over and mow my yard or help around the house. I ruined her whole life the way she crushed me by losing the only thing important to me.
My advice to you.....it did make me feel better when it all came out which is messed up but the revenge really was sweet.
2007-02-03 15:51:19 · answer #5 · answered by l'il mama 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Do it or not. It doesn't matter bc that's not what's important here. First deal with your feelings that came out of him sleeping with the girl you like. Have you always been envious of this guy becuse he takes chances and acts on ideas you only dream about? I don't think it's him you hate I think it's something inside yourself: lack of guts, not a risk taker? Why didn't you tell that girl you liked her b4 he got to her.
Second, his girlfriend doesn't need that news. Eight years is a big investment in a relationship. If he isn't gonna cheat again and that was just a moment of indiscretion then let their relationship live on.
2007-02-10 12:02:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if you had a woman and some other man slept with her would you want to know? and that said do you have any evidence or is it your word against his. Without evidence you may be better off keeping your mouth shut and do not forget if he is your co-worker he can get you fired easily. If you want to tell then get real evidence and set up another job. and you may as well go after his woman while your at it. She could use a man that will not cheat on her.. you are not the cheating type are you?
2007-02-03 15:53:20 · answer #7 · answered by sphericaluniverse 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Grow some balls! The girl that you like slept with him as well! What goes around comes back around! This girl slept with a guy who has a girlfriend.....and you still got issue over that.... you should be happy... finding out what kind of female she is!
2007-02-11 12:10:28 · answer #8 · answered by Lady D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the high ground and forget the matter. If you haven't forgotten about it in 8 years its time you did. Plus these sorts of revenge actions have a way of backfiring, maybe he has a way of getting even with you! Move on.
2007-02-11 05:19:56 · answer #9 · answered by pilot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same problem years ago, I told his girlfriend, ended up sleeping with her later that night. Her revenge to him. I lost 2 friends that night. Let it go. He will get caught without your help and you will be happier with yourself in the long run. Cheers
2007-02-08 13:26:00 · answer #10 · answered by jeff c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wasn't yours to begin with, so you have no right to put yourself right in the middle of their business. If you were at least her boyfriend, it'd be a whole other situation. However, she was free, he took his chance, and if he gets caught on his own, then it's his problem. Also, think about his girlfriend. If they've been together that long, don't you think she'd be devestated? Don't ruin a relationship of another person just because you're a little jealous.
2007-02-03 15:50:04 · answer #11 · answered by David H 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋