Lately my sex live has been great...and I can thank the internet for that. I have recently been chatting with an ex and when we chat, it's very dirty and raunchy. He gets me excited. When my husband (yes we're married) comes home, I'm like a wild animal with him and sex is great! Although I'm wanting more from him (exploring new things) the sex is still good. Even though I'm chatting and "cheating" online...it's benefitting me and my husband (who is loving this new me). Do you think that I should stop talking to the ex?
2007-02-03 07:42:02 · 39 answers · asked by qtpie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've told my husband that I want him to talk dirty with me and he just seems embarassed. He's just very quiet and not adventurous.
2007-02-03 07:50:19 · update #1
Using the internet for cybersex to get excited for hubby is good..
Doing it with your ex is BAD..
Find someone you have no history with...A stranger far away...
Someone you have never met and will never meet...
When hubby finds out, he probably won't get too upset about
anonymous cybersex...
But cybersex with an EX is going to really make him jealous & mad.
2007-02-03 07:47:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes and I'll tell you why. It confuses me why you talk raunchy to this guy who is your ex. Not only that it turns you on and when he comes home you are a wild animal. What is it that turns you on that your husband can not? I suggest you go to your husband and tell him what turns you on, etc. Secondly, if it's the raunchy and dirty chat that turns you on. Do that with your husband. Maybe you can send forth some messages back and forth while he is at work. And in general, cheating (or as you put it "cheating")is bad for any relationship. Ignoring that fact by saying "it's benifiting me and my husband" is not a good idea. You are not addressing some serious issues in the relationship.
2007-02-03 07:47:23 · answer #2 · answered by Namaste 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just can't believe some of the posts in here. Shows you why marriage is not taken seriously in some lives. But guess they think that it is okay, just like you think that is ok.
I think what you are doing is totally wrong using your ex just to get you excited for your husband. There are other ways to get you excited, but did you have to stoop this low? If you knew that your husband was this way, you shouldn't have married him. You are not being honest with yourself and your husband. What you need to do is explore your talks with him, even though he doesn't talk 'dirty' to you, there is nothing wrong with that either. So you should do that to him instead. What is going to happen when he finds out that you are different because your 'ex' talks dirty to you, rather than making your husband lose his manhood. (?)
Don't let another man get you all bothered when still your husband is better doing other things with you. You just need to show him and start it off, he will get the hang of it. You are just leading your 'ex' on. Pretty soon your 'ex' is going to want to have the real thing and you might be tempted to mess with him in person, and then your marriage will be in deep trouble. Then what will you do?
So start exploring by using your own techniques on your husband rather than relying on someone else! Sheesh, even you called it cheating! Is this what you are going to teach your daughters to do too? If you want to help your husband, maybe consider on getting self-help books of some sort, you are not helping him by fantacising about what the other man said to you! You should be thinking about your husband!
Remember those vows you made to your husband, "For better, for worse". You already broke the contract dear!
2007-02-03 08:12:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to be very careful. A lot of people believe that cheating on the net is the same, but personally I think, while it's not right, it's no where near as bad. Make sure you don't meet up with your ex in a private place or the concequences might be physical cheating.
You also need to make sure that your husband has no way of finding out where you are getting your inspiration from. Imagine how hurt he would feel.
Other than that, enjoy the better sex life, but be careful.
2007-02-03 08:11:34 · answer #4 · answered by Ang H 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have to admit that I played online for years. It was very hot and exciting and yes, I thought it added a spice that was missing from my marriage. It felt very freeing, like I could express myself more or less anonymously in ways I didn't feel free to do otherwise. The problem is, this will gradually consume more and more of your time and energy, take it away from your hubby and your life, and he will be in the awkward spot of losing his position in your life of being your #1 fantasy man without ever knowing it. Truthfully, your husband may not have a huge issue with this (I would love it if both my wife and I could have cybersex every great now to spice things up, then we could tease eachother about it). You could run it by him at some innocent moment down the road to test his reaction. A shared experience with your hubby would be an ideal compromise, huh?
2007-02-03 08:09:39 · answer #5 · answered by Paul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a problem - how would you feel if your husband was going out and buying whores, learning new things with them, and bringing it home to you? Sure, it makes your sex life better, but it's STILL CHEATING. You'd better tell him WHY the sex got better, not just let him think it's something HE'S doing. I love how people try to justify their abhorrent behavior...
2007-02-03 08:53:08 · answer #6 · answered by lookinforanswers 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think being made to feel sexy and wanted is important to everyone. The sexier we feel, the more into sex we are. You are meeting the need to be wanted and desired by your ex. My only concern would be if your husband is aware you are talking to the ex, and how he feels about it. Secrets can lead down a dark path.
2007-02-03 07:47:19 · answer #7 · answered by Shelley 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop talking to the ex. You never know, he might be telling others about this and showing them the proof. And you know how certain people love to talk and will be more than happy to let your husband know.
2007-02-03 08:00:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah. Take the quotes out of "cheating" because even though you're not actually having sex with your ex, you are betraying your husband. Why don't you try some erotica or porn to get you excited instead of bringing someone else into it. How do you think your husband would feel if he knew? I'd bet he'd feel betrayed...I know I would if I was in his shoes.
2007-02-03 07:46:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Cheating is cheating whether online or off. Your hubby probably suspects that you are up to no good but is enjoying it while it lasts. That is the nature of men.
2007-02-03 07:48:05 · answer #10 · answered by dreamgirl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋