Do cultural and familial 'shoulds' (you should be ______) determine who are to the world? Do you ever...

Question

Do ever feel like a phony? Have you overcome these outside influences and escaped the box 'they' put you in? How?

Thanks!

Answer 1

The only "should" I've conformed to is my families. I should be a good person, thats it. It was never spoken, more through actions and such.

As for culture, I should be this pretty, model thin, housewife, that gets married, has 2.5 kids, a dog, and a house, supports her husband no matter what, and does not even think about divorce.....

what I am....I'm a 23 yr old queer femme, my partner is a ftm male, not married as it's not legal, no kids, not possible (Cause I'd be rich if that happened! lol), we have one dog, but many other pets we love as much to. I do support hym no matter what it is hys dreams are.

How did I over come this, but looking at the people that wanted something different, telling them who I am, and if they don't like it, or don't want to be around me after I tell them who I am, they can walk away, good riddance, as I don't need people around me that does not like me for who I am.

I like the quote.

I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

Answer 2

The bad news is, yes. The shoulds do not form who you Want to be but they do form who you are because of the inner conflict.
The Conflict... would be that most people want what they cant have and usually culture or family limits the access to a variety of things...

Answer 3

Yes, I did. I was child of the '50's and '60's. We changed everything our dear parents held so sacred. And it was good.
You must follow your heart and be true to yourself. Just remember, first, do no harm.

Answer 4

My pappy say I should be honest, & stop stealin'. He right outta his mine.

Answer 5

Yes it is assured. IM or email me after checking this out below. http://unbound.biola.edu/