Can you say how long it takes for a victim of rape to start having sexual relations again?

Answer 1

Whenever the victim stops feeling like a victim and starts feeling like a human with needs again.

Answer 2

It depends on your support group and how the victim feels both physically and psychologically. Like having a death of a close relative (husband/ parent) so the rape victim goes through a process of mourning and anger - until finally forgiveness of one self - (that is the biggest issue - until you forgive yourself - it was not your fault! you are not whole). When all these issues are resolved then you are ready to be part of society - though trust will probably be an issue. Most rapes are done by someone you know and even possibly like.

Answer 3

smarty: The "when" depends on a lot of factors. These being the degree of mental (psychological and emotional) damage, physical damage and the quality and amount of professional rehabilitation undertaken. Rape ... like incest is pure "soul" murder. Oftentimes, its victims may NEVER be able to relate to a member of the opposite sex (partner) "normally", again ! It is just THAT serious of a crime. Personally; if I had the legal power, rapists and child molesters would be executed - put to death for this. A rape victim is "dead-men" walking, for life and the perpetrator lives to stalk and rape again, another day.

P.S. ktlyneeee - my heart goes out to ya! You have come a long way in your recovery ! You have NOT allowed your perpetrator to steal your life from you. Keep up the GREAT work in your recovery !

Answer 4

some people start soon after, but that doesn't mean there wont be any obvious problems with intimacy or being able to fully undress themselves etc.... and some people don't have sex for a long time after, it can, in some even change their sexuality.
every person who is raped reacts differently so its all most impossible to give an exact answer but like i said almost always there will be problems in sex, intimacy AND relationships, and those problems can go on for years, especially when not dealt with.
i think when someone is raped, it is always best to give themselves time before they start having sexual relations again because it can have an impact on their recovery and mental state. and they should never put pressure on themselves to please others or to "get over it", getting over rape and its effects can take a long time, and often involves having to rebuild their lives.

Answer 5

It took me 6-7 years before i even thought about having a boyfriend (i was raped over a course of 3-4 years when i was a young child) i had my first boyfriend at 14 but even after we started going out i didnt do anything but hug him until after 8 months! We have now been together for 2 and a half years and i am a lot more opened up to him. Being raped just completely shatters your trust of all people and leaves you with a lot of damage.

Answer 6

each human is different a woman could have sex the same day as being raped in some cases.
so long as there is no physical injury and i would hope you have a std check then when ever you feel like it .
a woman who does not want sex for some time after being raped and she does not have physical injury is most likely having trouble understanding that just because some lunatic nut case raped her does not mean all men are like that or that what happened to her was even sex. sure the parts hitched up and all but the minds of the rapist and the victim sure wont match up so just try to understand that your husband or boyfriend is not seeking to have anything that is remotely similar to what the horrible rapist did . what the rapist did is to my mind not thinkable really i cant begin to comprehend what nut would ever do such a thing .
anyway i hope you are all right and that you remember that sex and rape are light years apart from each other.

Answer 7

This is a very hard question to answer but i will have a go, I myself was Raped as a child and to this day i can not have proper sex i hate certain parts of sex and this ruins relationships.
I have a very under standing partner who also had the same trauma as a boy and he is the same cannot stand been body close to much so my message to people who have partners that have been through this is have lots of patience and love beacuse you cannot rush. may take a life time. Look at our web site http://breakingthesilence2006.com

Answer 8

It is different for every victim. For me, I felt like I needed to regain "control" because that is what my rapists (yes that is plural) stole from me "my control".
So I went out in less than a week and went wild!! I would go to a bar and just pick a man and go with him. I did this for quite awhile, about a month a half (not every night). Till I thought I was in control of WHO WHERE and WHEN. Then I wasn't a victim anymore.
But that's just how I handled it.

Answer 9

listen to my true story. in the year 2005,i lived in rome as an ignorant boy from third world country. one day some catholic men invited me to thier house for party.there and then four of them over powered me and raped. the fifth man was covering this abuse with a video camera. all these things were meant to destroy my future. i later left that country to another western country where i had finally settled down with a woman as my wife. honestly i hv forgiven the italians for this even though i may not easily forget. today i have started having sexual relation.

Answer 10

it all depends on the person.

for some victims who are married or dating they might have sex sooner- since they are with someone they trust. Vs a single victim who has to first find someone to trust in general, then trust for sexual relations after being raped

Answer 11

It depends on so many things - the nature of the experience, the personality of the person to whom it happened, whether they have a supportive family and friends and whether they have a supportive and understanding partner... probably lots of other things as well, including the whole expereience of reporting the incident and how it was dealt with (e.g. court case etc).

It is really important for the 'victim' to talk about what has happened to them with someone they trust (e.g. friend, counsellor) at a time when they feel it is right. They should not be forced into releasing their memories and emotions at a stage when it is difficult for them to cope (i.e. too early).

It can take months, but also it cold take years or decades.