She found a panty liner that is not hers. I have never cheated on her ( since we have been married ) and told her that our cat may have taken it out of the bathroom trash. It could be her mom's I told her. Is there anything I can do or say to make her believe me. I wouldn't be asking this question if I were guilty.
2007-02-03 03:04:04 · 26 answers · asked by jjayferg 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She needs to think about this one. A panty liner behind the bed? What does she think you did peel it off someones panties and toss it.? And what have you done to make her think that if you were to cheat, would you be that low to bring the person into your house and do it in your own bed? I think that if she doesn't believe you then it is her job to take the pantyliner and go and ask everyone who has used your bathroom is it theirs. lol. What else can you do?
2007-02-03 03:12:50 · answer #1 · answered by *queenfairy1*Antioch California 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough one. Might I suggest by asking your wife's mom whether she'd actually discarded a panty-liner at that time - it might be slightly embarrassing asking an older woman about this, but there's a lot at stake and you don't have to say everything about why you're asking (i.e. you don't have to say that your wife is suspecting you, but you can say that you were surprised to find a panty-liner behind the bed and that you suspect the cat). Also, is the cat in the habit of disturbing the bathroom trash? 'cos you have a better case if it is, and such an object would definitely attract the cat's attention.
Best of all would be if your wife's mom could recall the day (even the time) that she discarded it - e.g. was she visiting that day, as opposed to living with you permanently - and you could show that you weren't at home that day/time. (I don't suppose there were any visiting female friends around that time? if not, don't make up a story, 'cos you've started honest and you want to stay that way).
This really is a tough one and I wish you well.
2007-02-03 03:17:23 · answer #2 · answered by mrsgavanrossem 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah it really does suck when you have actually not cheated and you get accused of it!! But you can't blame your wife for thinking it right? Say one of your friends was emptying his pockets in the bathroom garbagecan and the cat found a condom wrapper and brought it out to play with.....would you question your wife?
Trust is an extremely hard thing to maintain in a relationship and to re-establish once it has been broken...almost impossible. Give it time. Don't be mad at her for not forgiving you or trusting you right away. You know you did nothing wrong and that should be enough.
2007-02-03 03:27:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will still be asking if you were guilty (maybe)
does her mother live with you
when was she last wear panty liner
since you know you did nothing tell her and it is up to her to trust you or not
because the more you force the issue the less she will beleive you
2007-02-03 03:26:28 · answer #4 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously, you know nothing about it since you asked this board the question.
I would sit down with her and make a list of all of the women who've been in your home over the past month (hopefully the trash hasn't been behind the bed longer than that) and have your wife go to each of them and explain her worries and see which one will say "I use that brand and it is probably mine".
You can't do this task for obvious reasons.
2007-02-03 03:13:23 · answer #5 · answered by Lois M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my gosh! Has she had any friends over? Maybe one of her friends left it in the trash and the cat got it. My cats get into everything - including stealing my husbands wedding ring (kind of like you - not so good for him!). If you've never given her reason to doubt you (in marriage as you say), then she needs to let it go. Then go buy a new garbage can for the bathroom, one the cats can't get into! Best of luck!
2007-02-03 03:10:06 · answer #6 · answered by Carey L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a cat that used to drag my bras around the house when I was gone. Only you know if you are telling the truth. Is there any reason why your wife suspects you of doing something? In a good marriage, the suspicions wouldn't arise.
2007-02-03 03:39:56 · answer #7 · answered by Lake Lover 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats very interesting i must say. but what i can tell you is to let her cool down about the situation instead of keep badgering her about it. give her a day or so and stop trying to think of under what circumstances it got there. i you know you're not guilty once she calsm down approach her confidnetly yet sincerely. Be youreself and be genuine. I believe you and she knows you a lot better than I do so just tell her the truth
2007-02-03 03:17:47 · answer #8 · answered by Tia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cats do anything for a laugh, don't they? I believe you buddy. My cat does the same strange rituals. Just make sure those things make it to the curbside trash, and are not left out where cats can get into them.
2007-02-03 03:14:27 · answer #9 · answered by Luvy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a lot of different views on this board, some just not worth mentioning others hold a lot of clout. Have your wife read this board with its many answers, if she still doesn't believe you there really isn't much you can do about it except maybe counseling or if possible, just dropping it and moving on.
2007-02-03 03:42:17 · answer #10 · answered by javagirl329 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋