This past two weeks have been quite problematic for my boyfriend and I. It all started since the time, he has been told that he won't get promoted by his boss. He told he had a fight with his boss about it and is really not happy with it. He has been very strange since! He has been distancing himself. I took it personallyHe told me that he is sorry for neglecting me but he needs to distance himself. He said he needs to look for a new job. I find it very hard though that he has been so distant with me? I even accused him of seeing someone else as he told me he needs to be alone. Last night he called me and he told me that I only bring him more troubles and more worries. He said I don't support him. He said that these kind of troubles have been happening too often and he is tired of this. He said that he does not think I am the right girl for him? I asked him if he wants to continue, he said yes but he said something has to change really fast as I cannot suffer this way. What should I do
2007-02-02 23:38:15 · 10 answers · asked by Elisa N 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well this is gonna sound brutal but wake up girl and realise that not everything is about YOU. Have some sympathy and understanding, your man is obviously very down at the moment and dissapointed that he hasnt got the job he wanted and all you can do is accuse him of seeing someone else. Partnership is a 2 way thing and sometimes you gotta take the back seat for a while and concentrate on him - imagine if the roles were reversed ? Would you then want him calling you up and demanding attention ?? He is just trying to sort his head and his life out by the sounds of it and you need to step back and give him space to do it. Let him know you are there to support him but leave out the 'needy' act for a while - he'll respect and love ypu alot more for it xxx
2007-02-02 23:44:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Right now your boyfriend is going through alot and I'm sure has alot on his mind. He is probably not feeling your support because of the cheating accusation. It takes a very mature person to share the feeling as he did with you. Let him know your their for him when he needs you but give him the space he is asking for (No questions asked) Sometimes the best thing you can do is just back away for a bit I know its hard but trust me if you dont you will loose him. Good Luck honey
2007-02-03 07:48:02 · answer #2 · answered by Amy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't mean this ugly, but in a way, he's right. You are NOT very supportive. He is going through some hard times, and all you're concerned about is YOU. I don't blame him from distancing himself from you....who wants to get kicked , when you're down! You need to ease up on him, or you're going to lose a good man. I don't think that's what you want, or you wouldn't have asked this question. As I said, I'm not being mean, but somebody needed to give you a "wake-up " call! Love that man....he NEEDS you right now!
2007-02-03 08:24:54 · answer #3 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
give the poor man a break. let him breath. give him some space to find the answers to his difficulties.
putting pressure on him is of no help at all. he needs that like a hole in the head.
it seems to me he's only getting grief, not support out of this relationship.
maybe you're more concerned about your own feelings, rather than helping him through this bad patch.
i would focus on him, not my own thoughts.
don't they call that love?
2007-02-06 20:45:46 · answer #4 · answered by rhin0692002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yar I had suffered the same last yrs the only thing u can do is keep patient
try to understand him means leave him alone ie to say never tell him to do any thing what ever he say just agree happily with out argue even if it hurt you this all you have to bear for some time until his problem are over give him some time.
yar hamare elation to tut chuke the unhone hame na hi problem kahi thi nahi resta todne ka karan
hame ye sab samaj ne me ek sal laga ab ham hamesa unhe ye hi jatate ha ki unki kushi mae hi hamare kuse ha i told him we can be good friend we care for each other never complain control your self your emotion vo khud ap k pas ayega but will take time
2007-02-03 08:24:01 · answer #5 · answered by jaya l 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask him to tell you exactly where you could improve. What sort of support is he talking about.
You need to get into his head... drag it all from him and work on it. He is asking you for help. You will lose this guy if you don't take note on what he's saying. He's feeling very very down.
2007-02-04 19:43:41 · answer #6 · answered by Curious39 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my ex told me he was needing a bit space and moved into a bed-sit but i found out later that he never used it, ( the bed-sits belonged to my friend) he was 44 and he had been seeing an 18 year old for a while so that would explain his mood swings, he had the balls to cheat on me and move out to be with her but never had the balls to tell me the truth, i just hope that's not what is happening in your relationship, good luck xx
2007-02-03 07:59:40 · answer #7 · answered by MAD FEMALE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it seems like he is looking for an excuse out of the relationship, you can see though just leave him alone and let him be by himself, you will just have to move on..
2007-02-03 07:48:21 · answer #8 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to be super supportive right now.
Tell him your sorry for accusing him of seeing someone else and that you want to help him in any way you can.
Good Luck.
2007-02-03 07:49:45 · answer #9 · answered by eyes_of_iceblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he sounds like he needs yoyr help and support for the future, things in his life is changing and he needs your help and support to achieve what he wants and make the right move.
Be there for him encourage him and make him feel speciala nd you support what ever he choses to do.
2007-02-03 07:48:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋