I dont want to live anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!?

Question

I dont want to die, but I dont want to live, I have no support, I dont belong anywhere, Ive tried therapy, meeting with groups at church, bought books on recovering from abuse and neglect from parents, have prayed to God, meditation, life has become unbereable. I am foreing so I just dont fit in, the lonliness is killing me, I just dont belong and know people here just could care less if one mexican less lives here, I feel as if I was invisible to everyone else. Cant stand my life anymore!!!

Answer 1

always remember that GOD does not make junk and he loves you even when it seems no one else does besides you have a mission to complete thats why you where put here in the first place and you havnt finished it yet so he is not ready for you to die

Answer 2

Quote- "I just don't belong and know people here just could care less if one Mexican less lives here..."

You can't blame this on being Mexican and being here in the US. My sis just got back from Mexico and said the native people there were simply wonderful people and very happy living there. She asked why it was that so many of the ones that are in the US have a bad attitude and constantly trash the US and speak of how they LOVE Mexico. Can you not go back to Mexico?

If you have had abuse and neglect from your parents you must seek help. You are obviously depressed. Don't stop praying, try a DIFFERENT church, book, therapist, etc. It takes time to find the right help. Hang in there and try this - SURELY you have SOME blessings in your life no matter how small.? Thank God for those and more will come your way. I have been where you are mentally and there IS help for depression. Some days, I'd just look at my beloved dog and cat and their unconditional love would overwhelm me with HAPPY tears, despite the bad things I was coping with. Also, confide in a friend. If you don't have one, make one! Good luck to you- you WILL survive this depression if you don't give up on seeking help.

Answer 3

I recently felt this way and considered the same thing. Things get better. You are being stripped down for a reason, to create space for so much more. Believe me I know.

Just keep your eyes and heart open for the next couple of weeks. But try to see things from a new perspective. There is a new perspective there you can't see just yet. The problem is you can't help viewing your present based on what has happened to you in your past.

That is gone now.

Take a look all around you (360 degrees) and find something. And talk to a friend, or a hotline. That's what I did.

It's the loneliness that kills you. Am I right? :)

You're unique.

You are your life's purpose. Don't worry :)

Answer 4

I just wonder what you do during the day or other times. Therapy and self help books can be hard work. I am not trying to trivialize your pain but sometimes making a list of simple things you enjoy or can at least do- like go for a walk, take a bath, watch a movie, can help. I read a book once on depression which suggested going for a walk every day, he said "I am not asking you to enjoy it. I am just asking you to do it". Eventually you might start to enjoy it. Sometimes even just one friend can help- it can also be difficult and confusing meeting many different people for short periods of time. Also I don't know how long you went to therapy for- maybe it wasn't long enough. Nurturing yourself is important but we are all human and sometimes need care from others or simply interaction with others too. I don't know how you went with meditation but if you are feeling like you describe a lot I imagine you found it difficult, if so don't do it now- maybe later you can but now is the time for nurturing not too many challenges or things at which you might "fail"- this will only make you feel worse.

Answer 5

I know this is going to sound typical, but.....don't do anything stupid to yourself. When I was younger, I thought the exact same things as you do right now, and I actually tried to kill myself, thank-God I didn't succeed. I have a wonderful husband and two beautiful boys that I love more than this whole world. If I had killed myself I wouldn't have any of those things now. I think your looking at things too bleakly, when you go to these functions, are you really trying to be there, or are you looking for more excuses to be miserable. You do have to give a little. I'll bet there were lots of people there trying to make you feel welcome, but your just so far into depression that you thought too much about the "meaning" of what their saying other than just trying to enjoy the company and the conversation. I think you need to try the church or meetings again, but this time give it a real honest to goodness try. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised, and try to get involved instead of moping in the corner. You can do this I know you can......just try, your future husband and children are depending on it

Answer 6

I am sorry to hear that you feel this way. Life in America can be hard for a mexican. Some of us do care though. I know that you may feel its hopeless, but it is not. When you get a little older you will see it differently. I was always helped in my times of desperation by "THIS TOO SHALL PASS" and "THAT WHICH DOES NOT KILL ME WILL ONLY MAKE ME STRONGER!" And then I got strong in mind and body because those who hurt me would not win the fight. Those who tried to put me down inside a lttle box and tell me who to be and how to act would never win. I became the boss, in control of my life. i realized that if I gave up then they would win and there is no way I would give them that satisfaction. You should live, and strive, and forget them, make your own life!!!! You have put up with so much you know you deserve it. Whatever nationallity you are is not important!!! you are human that is a fact and no one is like you. Maybe you even have a story to tell and could help others like I want to!!! Don't give up, pass on my words to similar people. I will check to see if you post again.

Answer 7

Honey, there's this thing called "positive thinking". To live life meaningfully, you need a purpose in life , a goal. Then you work towards it.

Life is a gift. It needs to be lived well. Stop focusing on the negative , look at the brighter side of everything.

If you're a religious person, turn to God - it will work wonders, and you will not need anything else to find fulfillment .

Find something that ignites your passion - a hobby , a friend ...

I suggest you try one of Norman Vincent Peale's books - it shows you how positive thinking will change your life and your outlook. It's worth the effort, try it.

Answer 8

I AM SO SORRY YOU ARE FEELING SO SAD ,and I WISH i could think of something to say that can help,you say you have tried church,try another church their are so many keep visiting them ,you may find one you love , don't give up praying ,god hears your you prayers it may not be answered right away but just have faith and put your problems in his hands and ask him to help you and give you strength and he will help. said you tried therapy, so have I 'HAD SOME GOOD ONES AND SOME BAD ONES , try another one, I HAVE A GOOD ONE NOW THAT i see for my depression, I also had abuse from my grandfather, but you have to get help from counseling to help you deal with that, I'm still trying and am on medicine that helps with that too, I think most ever one in this world has problems but we have to just keep doing what we have to do, that's just a part of life ,and you can't just give up, their has to be something you enjoy; make a list ;bet you can find something ,THEIR IS SO MUCH OUT THEIR TO DO YOU JUST HAVE TO make your self get out and then maybe you will meet a friend, maybe you can go back to school if you didn't finish , don't know if this helped I HOPE IT DID . but the thing about not caring about one less Mexican is not true I CARE ABOUT YOU OR i wouldn't;t of answered this. I REALLY HOPE YOU GET TO FEELING BETTER, MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND HELP you find happiness.

Answer 9

you didn't give your age or situation, but About six yrs ago I was in a very similar situation. I was going down a path of self destructive behavior. A friend asked me if I would help him coach a baseball team. I really feel that this saved my life. I've coached youth baseball ever since and I couldn't live without it now. I'm not saying you have to have a vast baseball knowledge to be happy, but maybe find something good and positive to do with your time. If you volunteer to help those less fortunate than yourself it may give you that sense of purpose you are looking for

Answer 10

oh my princess I know you are feeling.. I have thoughts like this all the time too.. You just have to keep reminding yourself that you are a very special person and think of all the good you could do in the world. Decide to be the one that helps people just like you. Go to the city council and ask if they have welcome groups, or would they like to start one.. be the force that drives it! You know how hard it can be for you, how many others are feeling just like you? Volunteer at a shelter or somewhere where you can be reminded that there are many more people worse off than you in the world... Don;t be the one that gives in... be the one that makes the most of the situation! Don;t ever give up, don;t ever give in.. use the emotions you have for good... I have a feeling you were put on this earth to accomplish great things, you just gotta find where your strengths lay.. I have a great feeling about you! GO get em girl!

Answer 11

Just live your life one day at a time. Try really hard to think and do positive things for others. When you help dig someone out of a hole you can sometimes find a place to bury your troubles. As you grow older you will be able to find your place in life and just keep going. Think positive - be thankful for your life and try to make the world a better place for you and those around you. You can't help what happened too you - done by others - you can try to escape and make your own life when you can.