Do you define your character or is it defined by others?

Question

It is very easy to say that you are a smart person or funny or even attractive but by who's standards? if you use the standards of society to defind yourself then your identity is rooted in what others perseive of you. but if you don't use the standards of society to define yourself then what makes your perseption of yourself real?

Answer 1

I think it is a little of both, that you need to strike a balance between defining yourself and sitting into societal norms. I mean more power to you if you can be unique, but if you're so unique no one can relate to you of course you are going to feel alone. I think what makes your perception of yourself real is when you feel comfortable spending time alone, but you also enjoy spending time with others. Again, life is all about the balance.

Answer 2

Well, if you use society's standards to define yourself then you have a big problem, because you need to both be aware of how others see you, as well as have a good image of yourself. The most important thing is developing your personality by your own standards, because in the end nobody's opinion is going to matter as much as your own. Everybody can love you but if you hate yourself then you're still unhappy. I think it's important to be happy with yourself and at the same time strict, don't let your personality become something you wouldn't like in someone else. As for society... I say that if they can't accept you for who you are, you shouldn't associate with them. They're narrow-minded people who need to free their minds from the "Sheepflock" mentality.

Answer 3

I think you must be aware of your beahior as comapred to others but you must also be alert to the responses of those around when you are socializing and communicating. Perceptions happen all around us and we make judgements based on comparisons a lot. I think that you can categorize people but you cannot read thier mind and know for sure where their true self fits in because they could be putting up a front. The problem is societies rules are still broken or we wouldn't have crime and so there are behavior issues that we come to examine. It is a good idea to observe people but don't worry so much about what others think unless you are doing something really offensive. You have to live with your self so only you can be at peace with yourself. What you think is more imoprtant in the end.

Answer 4

Ha. Very confusing question. I'm going to say that in the end, does it really matter what others think of you? Okay so in general the opinions that you have of yourself, will be different than the ones of others. If you define yourself as beautiful, others will view you as ostentatious. If society today says that beauty lies in blonde hair, then those who change their hair color just to be what society wants are just trying to survive the best way they can: by being what society wants. True, if we use society to define ourselves then we have fallen prey to the opinions of others, which is why I define myself and what others say doesn't affect me. But, in order to define myself, I have to first understand what society wants, then I can either agree that that is what I am, or evaluate myself based on what I want to be and who I think I am. Not what ever society says. In the end if you believe that your perception of yourself is real, then isn't it? Isn't your opinion the only one that will matter in the long run?

Answer 5

these standards are based on the "common" eye but beauty as well as everything is in the eye of its beholder. Further more it really is hard to actually try to explain this that makes sense. An identity is based on a balance between the two. In a famous person's (forgive me for not remembering) quote, it is mentioned that when two are in power, one tend to control the other which leads to answers like "what do you think of yourself" and "Your friends should tell you." This also is the result of self consciousness and identity crisis. lol...getting away from the subject..>.<

Anyways a conclusion of yourself fall into three categories : 1 ) thinking higher than you really are (conceited) 2 ) thinking lower of yourself (low self esteem) and 3 ) being honest. Depending on which category a person's perspective of themselves is considered real.

As mentioned before..there really is a balance in what people think and what you think. In a larger perspective, you should rule over the perspective over yourself but other (like a self conscious) is like a little reminder to cool it when needed...

I hope this helps...cause when I read over, it was really confusing

Answer 6

i am myself and people either accept me for who I am or they just don't have anything to do with me. I am a very well liked person. funny, fun person to hang around and be with, but i like to have my time alone with my cats. I enjoy making people laugh and making them smile, trying to see them enjoy life as it is to short to waste it away!

Answer 7

You define ur own character and other help if they think ur loud and mean good friends should tell you!

Answer 8

What you think of yourself.