ok so i am 22 and my husband 21. we have been toghter 3 yrs and married 6 months.we both have good jobs in the filed that we plan to work for a long time and we own a house and 2 cars so ithink we are pretty stable.... we are wanting to start our family but some people areound us are not very supportive and are sayin that we are to young, why would we want to ruin our marriage and realtionship... it is very hurtfull that people you want to be supportive are saynig such horrible things when all we want is a lil support and prayers... i have pcos so it is going to take awhile to start our family,we are going to have to some more test and treaments before we are able to conceive. so if you think we are to young please tell me so and why you think that way.... if you dont think we are to young tell me why you think we are old enogh to havekids and how to tell them that we want their support through this...
2007-02-02 12:34:50 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
ok one thing.. don't listen to anyone opinion on how old you should be to start a family.. i stared mine at 20.. now at 25 have 2 wonderful children... you will never be 100% ready or financially capable it is all in your heart and between your husband/partner and yourself on whether you want to take that step, and fill a void. Creating a family is a wonderful thing.. who cares what everyone says.. you are both mature adults that can make very good decisions.. From what I can see you have everything a child needs( love, support, stability). Here's a little hint all of the people that are twice your age or older telling you that your too young... should look in the mirror, several decades ago it was a normal thing to start families in the late teens and early twenties. it is healthier for a woman to produce children earlier in life rather than later. Less health risks for mom and baby. Plus that lower chance of developing cirvical cancer. My wishes and Prayers are with you.
2007-02-02 12:47:52 · answer #1 · answered by kat 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Age has nothing to do with it in my opinion. I think that if you have an environment that is supportive of starting a family then by all means no matter what your age is go for it. Especially if you are both in agreement on both wanting to start a family not one person persuading the other. If a couple is financially secure, has a stable environment (including a lasting relationship, marriage is a bonus not a necessity) and are ready to enjoy the process then why not? If you are ready then definatly start trying, especially as you know it will take longer. Once everyone around you sees just how badly you are both wanting this to happen they will come around. Good luck to both of you! My husband and I got married 2 years ago and just recently started trying thinking it would just instantly happen, and it doesnt all the time just "snap" happen. We're both 24 and thought it would come easily, hopefully this week it'll work :o) My prayers are with you both.
Good luck!
2007-02-03 01:30:46 · answer #2 · answered by frostedbetty 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
After you become an adult , age is only your concern no one elses. However , as a person who got married older and got pregnant soon after let me tell you there is NEVER a "good" time to have a baby . Some people are more prepared than others .
Just try to be as ready as you can financially ( save at least 4 months combined salary ) , Get life insurance and good health insurance for you and your spouse , Save for the 12 weeks minimum you'll be off of work ( in addition to the 4 "emergency months" ) , work out costs of food, diapers, daycare, health insurance and save this money for 6 months ( you can use it to buy all the stuff you need but wont get from your baby shower)
Emotionally , talk about it , alot . Agree now about things like religion , schooling, discipline , duties ....so these do not "pop" up after baby is here . Maybe get a dog and raise it for a year from a puppy ( but only if you also want a dog , not as some big guinea pig ) and discipline and treat the dog as you would a baby ( within reason) .
When you can accomplish these things take it to your families and tell 'em to stick it ! You are a big girl now !
2007-02-02 20:47:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't really think it is anyone elses business when you start a family if you think you are ready and can support it. I got married at 19 (I turned 20 the next month) but my husband and I waited over four years to start a family. The only advice I would give you is that we really enjoyed just having the us time and making our relationship even stronger and enjoying the only time for the next twenty years that it will just be the two of us. You might wait a year just so you can have some fun just being married and loving each other. But if you are absolutely convinced that now is the time then do what you think is best, it is your marriage and your life.
2007-02-02 22:24:49 · answer #4 · answered by I love sushi 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't have to listen to those negitive oppinion. I am the same with you. I just got married about 6 month now. And we are ancious to start a family. It all depending on you honey. If you are ready why not. I am 23, age don't matter, and plus you are married wat are you worring about. We all here support your opinion. beside you and your hubbi have a stable job. THere is no one that can stop you. Oh yes also, having a child don't break your marriage apart. It even bring you more closer together. The baby is the string in your relationship to hold you together. He/she is a bundle of joy in your and your husband life. And i heard alot say this too. with our age rite now if you have a kid in the future you will always look young. :) by the time you get older you will be more relazed and not all up tight. i am not saying its not good to have baby late. Its ok age doesn't matter. but i have seen profs of those who got preg young.
2007-02-03 04:03:06 · answer #5 · answered by swtkupid 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you are ready. You sound stable in many ways. It is nobody's business and if the people around you love you and care about you they should support your decision to start a family. Since it may take some time to become pregnant you should begin to look at your options now. It took a woman I know 7 years to conceive. Don't wait, especially if you feel like you want children now. Good luck!!
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2007-02-02 22:57:16 · answer #6 · answered by luvmykids 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think late 20s is the best time to have kids. That just comes from my own personal experience though. As long as you feel stable in your marriage and in your finances I think your ages are fine. It would be nice though if you could have at least a couple of married years together before starting your family. Good luck!
2007-02-02 22:01:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i don't think it's about your age, but your maturity, andyour ability to take care of a child financially, physically and emotionally. Ifyou think that you've both got all of your bases covered as far as that stuff, then you're probably both ready to be parents... but that doesn't necessarily mean you're ready to have a family together. You have been together for 3 years but only married for 6 months. And along with the basic status change of commiting yourselves to each other for life comes a change of the actual dynamics of your relationship too. Give yourselves time to really enjoy being a husband and wife and really fall into those roles and be secure in them before you bring someone new into the family! Because once you have that baby, there are two very different roles for both of you to need to handle (being spouse AND parent). If you can give yourselves enough time to be secure as a spouse, it will be that much easier to balance both roles, because they won't both be "new".
2007-02-02 21:08:48 · answer #8 · answered by Cyndi Storm 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
me and hubby had our first when i was 23...we had been married 21/2 years. I think teen pregnancy is a little young, but your the perfect age. plus, your supposed to have kids when your young so you have the energy to keep up with them. I support you guys 100%. Don't listen to what those people are telling you. If you two feel its the right time, then go ahead and God Bless.
2007-02-02 20:53:18 · answer #9 · answered by angie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sounds like you're already ahead of the game to me!! you are married and stable. if you think you will have trouble conceiving, it is never too early to start looking into your options. we found out when we were 21 that we couldn't have biological children, and as hard as that was to hear and deal with, i'm glad we found out young so that we were able to know our options ahead of time. as to what others think...it's not their life and not their business. you and your spouse are the only ones that will be changing diapers and paying for college. if you decide to go ahead, don't broadcast to everyone your intentions. everyone thinks they can weigh in on your life, if you don't want the negativity don't include everyone until you are pregnant. then they only have the choice to be happy for you or keep their mouths shut. good luck in making your decision. (BTW we have a 3 year old daughter that we adopted, but didn't tell the nay sayers until we brought her home from the hospital. they all fell in love with her just like your friends and family would too!!)
2007-02-02 20:48:25 · answer #10 · answered by mcneely96 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋