It is as follows: Marcia sat quietly in her seat, barely listening to her teacher droning on from the textbook.
I think I might have some word choice issues there, bit I don't know how to fix them. Thanks :)
2007-02-02 11:39:16 · 9 answers · asked by al5645al 2 in Education & Reference ➔ Words & Wordplay
Okay, so so far this is what the paragraph looks like: Marcia sat quietly in her seat, in a totally different world then the one with her teacher speaking monkey from the textbook. Suddenly, she tuned back in and looked down at her own copy of the textbook. Something her teacher had said made no sense. (Although I'm still debating the first sentence)
What do you think?
2007-02-02 11:53:09 · update #1
Try rearranging your sentence structure and add some better vocab! :
Barely listening, Marcia sat quietly in her seat whilst her teacher droned on from the thick textbook.
2007-02-02 11:52:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Marcia sat quietly in her seat, in a totally different world then the one with her teacher speaking monkey from the textbook.
2007-02-02 19:43:35 · answer #2 · answered by Jennie N. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As Marcia sat quietly in her seat, she barely listened to her teacher's monotonous recital of the textbook
2007-02-02 19:52:28 · answer #3 · answered by Work Hard, Make Money, Enjoy Life... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds good to me except for a few things. You don't really need the comma though. Its a comma splice because the part after the comma isn't a complete sentence. Droning should also be drone. It should say...
Marcia sat quietly in her seat barely listening to her teacher drone on from the textbook.
Other than that, its a good sentence. : )
2007-02-02 19:46:47 · answer #4 · answered by dvd_clapp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marcia sat quietly in her seat, but her mind was in another world, as her teacher droned on .
2007-02-02 19:50:00 · answer #5 · answered by ramy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could write: As her teacher droned on from the textbook, Marcia sat quetly in her seat, barely listening.
As for the word choice, instead of barely you could say hardly listening, barely concentrating on her teacher etc.
You could say Marcia sat quietly at her desk, instead of seat.
Hope this helped!!
2007-02-02 19:47:26 · answer #6 · answered by gossipqueen 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sitting quietly at her desk, Marcia was worlds away from her teacher and the monotonous text.
2007-02-02 19:48:22 · answer #7 · answered by ADR 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Settled at her desk, Marcia's thoughts drifted away from the teacher's reciting of the textbook.
2007-02-02 19:45:17 · answer #8 · answered by Steph [♥] 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As her teacher lectured from the textbook, Marcia's thoughts wandered elsewhere.
2007-02-02 19:48:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋