I've been in a relationship since I was 16 and is now 18 years long. In certain aspects he can be very sweet and loving and things are great and everybody is happy. But he is very critical of EVERYTHING and usually very insulting. Nothing is ever good enough. When these things are brought up to him he turns it around and makes it feel like your fault and that you are over-reacting or being "stupid". This inspires a lot of self-doubt. How do you know if it actually IS you or if it's really emotional/mental abuse?
2007-02-02 04:54:12 · 10 answers · asked by red_writer2007 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Added Note: I've left twice before. He convinced me to come back by a) convincing me that he's changed or b) making me feel like I didn't try hard enough and that it's all in my head. The self-doubt comes in because I wonder if he's right and then I'm afraid of making the wrong decision.
2007-02-02 05:04:25 · update #1
I would have to say this sounds alot like my marriage (which I'm getting out of, by the way)
No one has the right to tell you that your opinions are stupid, and no one has the right to make you feel that way about yourself. Emotional abuse is just as bad as physical. The man you love shouldn't hurt you in that way. Hell, NO ONE should hurt you in that way. Some people are easily influenced, and some people are good at completely breaking down another person...even if they don't notice they're doing it.
Perhaps you should talk to him about it. Tell him it's hurting your feelings. If he brushes you off, and tells you that your opinion is stupid or that you're crazy...perhaps it's time to reevaluate your marriage.
Good luck.
2007-02-02 05:03:58 · answer #1 · answered by Tiffany D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out run, mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. If you are asking the question you already know, you just want validation. You have it I am validating that you are in an abusive relationship.
Why would you want to stay in a relationship that a guy is constantly yelling at you, calling you an idiot and less degrading names.
Eventually the oral and mental abuse will turn to physical abuse.
My dear there is not enough love in the world to take and be in that kind of relationship. There are many men that are not like that, as a matter of fact I am willing to bet there is one in your life right now that is asking you "Why do you let him treat you that way?" because I am sure that he does this to you in public also.
Don't become a statistic, get out now. You will be surprised as to how much better you will be and sleeping at night will be a marvel.
You should leave even if you have to move back in with mom and dad. I am sure that if you told your father or brothers if you have any, there would be hell to pay.
My point is if you can not tell your father how he is treating you then there is something wrong with the relationship.
I hope this has been of some use to you, good luck.
"FIGHT ON"
2007-02-02 05:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by Skip 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a mental / emotional abusive relationship. I think you already knew that though, or you wouldn't have posed this question. There's not much you can do outside of hitting him in the head with a frying pan (joking, of course), but if he won't change his ways when you ask him nicely too, then maybe it's time you left for a few days and see if that gets his attention.
2007-02-02 04:59:16 · answer #3 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is emotional and mental abuse and do not doubt it for one moment. He is selfish, self-centered and wants to think about only himself therefore beating up on you makes him feel better about himself. He is in control. At work, he is not in control and this way he can control something and that is you. You are living with a very insecure person that suffers from rejection and probably self-hatred. You two need Jesus Christ in your lives.
2007-02-02 05:04:23 · answer #4 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like both mental and emotional abuse. Any time some one make you feel like less than a person you really need to consider your options and whats best for you as a woman I have been thorough it and I know how it makes you feel. you need to give this relationship some serious thought.
2007-02-02 05:10:47 · answer #5 · answered by tameka r 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like emotional/mental abuse to me. One perosn cannot be 100% at fault. If someone is making you feel that way then they are wrong and their actions are abusive.
2007-02-02 05:00:26 · answer #6 · answered by rcbricker33 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it all depends on how it makes you feel when you hear him say these things. If it hurts, then yea I would say its abuse. If you can relate to what he is saying and understand that its only words of encouragement then I think different. Dont let anyone put you down or discourage you! If they really cared about you they wouldnt try to hurt you!
2007-02-02 05:10:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
all the behaviors you describe are emotional/psychological abuse. psychological abuse is what that's indexed as in maximum medical definitions. the 2d source indexed is expounded to infants, however the kinds of issues indexed are the comparable in spite of age.
2016-09-28 08:02:33 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like hes a jerk to me..
my ex did that a lot too.. he'd make me feel bad about myself.. and he seemded to blame me for all his problems.. like how he bought his car to impress me.. and was quite an expensive car ..
just other things like that.. blaming me all the time..
i finally got sick of it and left him..
life is way to short to be unhappy
and if you think about it do you really want to spend the rest of life living the way you are?
you deserve to be with someone who makes you feel special and loved.. and important .. thats what real love is..
i hope you find it
2007-02-02 04:59:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is a jerk, leave him
2007-02-02 05:10:07 · answer #10 · answered by Joe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋