I was so messed up I could not walk straight and I ended up kissing a guy friend. This was months ago, but I still geel guilty about it even though it would have never happened had I have been straight. It never happened again and it was so quick. I told the the guy that it was a big mistake and we were just too messed up to see it at the time, and he knows I am in a happy and loving relationship with my husband and I dont want to lose him for anything. If I could take the whole night I would, but to be honest, it has opened my eyes to how much I actually love my husband and I miss him more and more every day. Please help if you have this same situation and how you dealt with it. I dont want to tell my husband because I will lose him over this dumb dumb mistake. I love him more than anything.
2007-02-02 02:38:39 · 21 answers · asked by sunshine 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, that's cheating. How would you feel if your husband made out with another woman?
2007-02-02 02:43:53 · answer #1 · answered by Classy Geisha 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are right it was a dumb dumb mistake. But you had a choice in all of this... You did not have to get wasted, it lowered your inhibitions, which we all know alcohol does. You put yourself in a position of compromise with this guy, and yes you chose to kiss him.( it wasn't that quick, you used your tongue) These actions were deliberate. That is why you are so guilty.( Why were you somewhere without your husband getting drunk?) If you absolutely know you will never choose to get that drunk again(especially without your husband) and if you know for sure that there is no way your husband could find out,(someone else may tell him) and if you can keep this secret in the vault for ever and ever,( without theguilt eating away at you) then I think you should never tell him. If you have any doubts about the 3 previous things, then you must tell him and suffer the consequences of your actions. I think at worst your husband will be devastated, and lose his trust in you. It will take alot to rebuild that trust, and you will never be able to take away the pain from his heart. I hope this all works out for you really. Oh and to answer your question about cheating? Yes what you did was cheating.
2007-02-02 03:02:40 · answer #2 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My advice 2 u is stop drinking the way u do because u have no control of what u do when u r drunk. A lot of people go through what u went through and yes it is considered cheating. If u want 2 get wasted then do it with ur husband at least u know u can kiss him and not feel guilty. And 2 get over it u just have 2 let it go because if u tell ur husband then u can 4 get about ur relationship because he will never ever trust u again. So good luck and stop drinking.
2007-02-02 02:51:27 · answer #3 · answered by Baby Gurl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Cheating, is a bit strong, remember this was a 5 day Test and if you went back over the entire match and calculated the amount of time "wasted" it would amount to over an hour, so to single out the last 10 minutes is isolating things a little, if Ponting could get his fields right we would have got another 10 overs at them
2016-05-24 05:02:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, were all human we all make mistakes. You were cheating though, I think it is best to tell your husband, if he loves you like you love him, he will understand. The problem with not telling your partner is that you may not feel guilt straight away but eventually it will come and when the time comes for you to tell them they will wonder what else you might have been hiding - even if that was your one and only mistake. Be honest with your husband, he would expect that from you, just like you would from him. I wish you well.
2007-02-02 14:23:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell yeah it's cheating, how could it be anything else?
So you are using liquor as your EXCUSE huh? What kind of women drinks to the point where she cant walk and ends up "frenching" her "guy friend"?
You need to tell your husband and if your relationship is strong enough then you should survive this but if you already have issues then this might just be the final straw.
It's bad enought that you are a cheater.... dont make it worse by being a liar too...... you owe it to him to tell him.
2007-02-02 03:26:36 · answer #6 · answered by RedEye 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Don't get that messed up in the first place that you can't walk!
2. You should feel guilty!
3. You should be out with your husband instead of other guys!
4. If this is common practice for you it will eventually lead to problems. Trust me I know. I have plently of experience with my wife doing this crap!
5. If your husband did this would you forgive him, if so, forgive yourself.
2007-02-02 09:38:28 · answer #7 · answered by eaglepoint1a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course it's cheating, and it's a dumb mistake. Since you miss your husband, I assume he is away (military?). Don't tell him about your little lapse. In the future, don't allow yourself to get into a situation where you get wasted with another guy. Make sure you always have a trusted girlfriend with you (preferably one who doesn't drink or at least can control her drinking) to help keep you from making a stupid mistake while under the influence.
2007-02-02 02:50:03 · answer #8 · answered by SA Writer 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well it is cheating but on the scale of cheating it's like a 2 on 10. Your husband probably wouldn't leave you for this, but he would probably be quite uncomfortable. If you want to ease your guilt you should tell him, but be prepared that it may really hurt him. So you might be stuck just keeping it inside. My thoughts are that if drinking does this to you and you really are married, then you shouldn't drink outside your home.
2007-02-02 03:08:31 · answer #9 · answered by stripedbook 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's cheating.
And you know it. He knows its cheating as well...
You aren't here really asking for advice. You already said that telling him loses him and you don't want to do that. You have already decided to continue to lie to him.
You want validation. An excuse. You ask for other women who cheat to help you get away with it. To help you anesthetize what conscience you have. So you can continue to lie.
Sorry, some mistakes are fatal. And you made one. You have two options in my eyes, neither of which are pretty.
1) Tell him and he leaves. I wont cry for you, you did it, not him.
2) Silence whatever morality you have bothering you. Killing ones conscience is not a terribly good thing to do.
Save your marriage or save your soul. Pick.
2007-02-02 03:11:56 · answer #10 · answered by jw 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Frenching isn't cheating even if you are cold stone sober. A kiss is just a kiss.
Look what is physical is just physical. What is in your heart is what is in your heart. Your heart still is with your hubby.
As long as you didn't deprive him of his wants then what you did didn't take anything away from him.
Just be a giving spouse who is in her mates life to make it the best that it can be.
2007-02-02 03:00:28 · answer #11 · answered by JRSK007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋