My husband left me and our 3 children 2 weeks ago. He is now in FL and not sure if he will come back. He says he will take care of the children but doesn't want me to file for child support. He's not working yet. Says if I do he'll sue me for half of everything. Just got a new house (3 months ago). Could I lose it and everything I have worked for? House not in his name. Finances are not jointly in his name. We were married in NY, house in PA. Where do I stand legally? He abandoned us and I'm left to care for our children in everyway (all under 10). We've been married for 8 years.
2007-02-02 02:33:08 · 8 answers · asked by Kim M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Although he may technically be able to claim 1/2 of the house, this is unlikely to happen. He isn't on the house because you obviously didn't need his income to qualify for the loan. This house was purchased for the benefit of the children. Judges are not just hard noses, they will use their best judgment in deciding joint factors such as this. You NEED to file for custody, child support and Alimony.
I was able to keep the house in lue of spousal support. But I originally filed for Alimony...and this was the was the alternative I suggested. It worked.
Hire an attorney, a good one will cost at least 3 grand, but It will save you in the long run.
2007-02-02 03:11:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, he should support his children.
Second, if the finances are all in your name, and you have all the money, then what are you worried about short term.
I would research what CS you would be due based on his income prior to moving, and tell him that if he is sending that amount every month, starting immediately, that you would have no reason to go after him for child support.
However, if he is not willing to provide that, or starts using lame excuses about no job, that you have no choice but to do what is best for your kids.
There are men out there who voluntarily pay child support. I was one.
I think it's worth a few weeks time to see if he will be a stand up guy before getting lawyers involved.
So give him a week or two to start paying. If he doesn't, ignore his threats, he would get 1/2 regardless, so if he wants to pay a lawyer to get what he would get anyway, let him throw his money away.
Keep your powder dry until you really need to use it.
I wanted to add that the point about filing for divorce in FL is a good one.
If NY laws are more in your favor, there is no reason you cannot file today.
That doesn't mean you are going to divorce him. But it does block him from getting his venue for the divorce. You can file and let it sit, not acting, or acting as slowly as possible if you want to reconcile.
So I further recommend researching the divorce statutes and see which venue is more advantageous to you, NY or FL.
2007-02-02 02:40:27 · answer #2 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know the marriage is over and it sounds like it is. You need to file. He does not want you to file because it sounds like he does not want to pay child support. He may send you a little money here and there. If you file he will be held responsible for paying support. The state will take into consideration that you have the children and you need a home for them. So I don't think they will take the home from you. He abandoned you after all. You need to see a lawyer and get legal advice. Don't listen to your husband he wants to get out as cheep as possible.
2007-02-02 02:41:24 · answer #3 · answered by Janst 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to file for child support asap!!! This is very important and a must... Hire an attorney now... They are his children and he is responsible for them just as much as you are. He needs to get off his behind and get a job now! Do you have a job??? You will need to get a full time job and he needs to get a job too and pay child support.. You are also entitled to alimony from him... Spousal support until you divorce him. He has used you from the start and is still using you now even from a distance and this is not fair to you and the kids. Go after him legally now! Do not wait or hold off any longer.
2007-02-02 03:03:24 · answer #4 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may be trying to establish Florida residency so he can divorce you down there. Rather than litigate long distance I suggest that you consider filing for divorce ASAP in the state where you two resided before he left. Don't let him bully you with threats of financial reprisal. He has already shown his colors by leaving you and young children behind.
2007-02-02 02:38:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st thing YOU MUST GO FILE FOR CHILD SUPPORT! no matter what he says even if hes being ligit with you(it can backfire) and you wouldnt lose the house ,you have the kids . not knowing the laws were you are though ,you may have to pay some for his expenses that he joined in in the house but you may also not have to. and trust me do this and everything legally!!! and with you having the kids he will probley lose everything not you. good luck and its going to be hard but in the end youll be fine. and DONT LET HIM BACK!!
2007-02-02 02:40:47 · answer #6 · answered by rocs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GO TO AN ATTORNEY NOW!!!!!!!! and get counseling--don't let him scare u
Texas is where I live...and we are a community property state...so in Texas yes he could get half wether his name appears on any documents or not assuming that purchse was made after the wedding date.
2007-02-02 02:37:08 · answer #7 · answered by sunbun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'd say u have to go to court and sort this out.....
2007-02-02 02:36:34 · answer #8 · answered by laydenirvine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋