nearly a week ago, my boyfriend broke up with me. he's never really trusted me and we have always had arguements about rumours about me and other guys...ive never EVER cheated on him. people have never spoken well bout me cos of things i did in my past (some true some lies) a month ago he confessed that he had cheated like a year ago cos he thought that i did the same. but i ended up forgiving him. we were great together, no more fights or anything. a week ago we started talknig bout the guys i had been with, and things i had done, which were quite embarrassiong so i just denied everything i got really nervous, and he "caught me". now he hates me and thinks im a lying *****. i regret it so much, but i had my reasons. now he doesnt believe anything ive ever told him. and ive only lied on my past! i sent him an email 4 days ago explaining everything, saying sorry and that i really loved him. i really really love this guy, and wud do anything to b with him.i please help!
2007-02-01 23:41:37 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
know i should move on, but he's just so so special to me...i love him so much...i really wana try fixing things up. duno, im just a person that thinks people commit errrors and that they can be fixed. i dont want to let go of someone so special so easily...
2007-02-01 23:42:05 · update #1
OK forget him, ok its not a great relationship. but do u think i will ever get to talk to him? i really dont wana loose him. i dont wana loose him as a friend/person... i just wan b able to phone him and say hey! hows ur life?
2007-02-01 23:59:41 · update #2
righto where is he i'll make him love you or ill open a can of whooparse on him,you didn't tell him about us did you?i'm only trying to lighten you up a bit as the truth hurts more.once you tell a lie do you really honestly believe that you have the right to expect anyone to believe you?and when it comes to emotions you can times the right answer by1000.the hardest thing to win back is trust.and i'll tell you now,it never returns.two ppl in a relationship can fool themselves that they can regain trust once it's been broken but it doesn't happen.and two wrongs dont make a right.it's bad enough that one partner cheats but when the other one does the same thing in retaliation that makes them twice as bad.your past is none of his business,the issue is what's transpired between the two of you in your relationship.and visa versa.the best advice i can give you is no tit for tats,no arguing what he done is up to him to fix,you just suck it in and say.my past has nothing to do with you and i'm sorry for whats happened (whatever the situation your talking about is)i do appoligise etc.etc.and i want to try again.leave it at that the rest is up to him.if he can't admit he's wrong also and apoligise and try to fix it he's not worth having.and if you both don't learn from this and take some good advice then neither of you are worth having for anyone.sorry to be so blunt but thats the way it is.
PS.trust is also something friends should have.
2007-02-02 00:07:14 · answer #1 · answered by BUSHIDO 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm afraid that his not trusting you will never get better. It seems you both have too much emotional baggage to continue a relationship. It will always be a sore spot between you. It's better now to cut your losses and go on to someone that can trust you. One thing I've come to realize is that the person who can't trust, can't be trusted. Many times you feel something negative about someone it's because you feel that same negativity in yourself. He can't trust himself so how would he trust you? Let this guy go and figure out his problems and you need to do the same. Plus (sorry this may sound harsh) you need to take a long look at your life. If there are many things in your past that you've done that cause issues in your relationships then you need to make some real changes in your lifestyle.
2007-02-02 07:52:14 · answer #2 · answered by i have no idea 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look ,,, you shouldn't want to talk to him again ,,,, You don't have any control over what he thinks or believes ,,,,, He's either going to believe you or he isn't ,,,, But the way he sounds he's not worth all this crap he's put you through ,,, If he felt about you the way he should then it shouldn't matter what you did in your past ,,,, If he felt about you the way he should he'd be bending over backwards proving to you that he love you ,,,, You need this guy like you need another hole in the head ,,,, You'd be better off with a broken leg ,,,, You don't have a relationship with this jerk ,,,, He's too wrapped up in himself ,,,,, A relationship should be fun and exciting ,,,, not what you have with him ,,,, Just move on ,,,,, there are plenty of fish in the pond ,,, Go fishing ,,,, Find someone that is fun to be with and will treat you the way you should be treated ,,,, He will probably come trouble and problem free also ,,,,
2007-02-02 13:59:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is feeling his own guilt and trying to put his guilt on you. Which probably means he has cheated more than once and still is. His guilt is eating him alive. So in his heart he knows what a piece of crap he has been and feels you are doing the same. It is wrong for him cheating on you it is NOT WRONG for you to have a PAST everyone does. You can't change the facts of your past and really it isn't any of anyones business. So from now on you don't have to tell all of your secrets. When someone loves you for the right reasons because of your qualities and appreciates you your past isn't an issue. Unless you murdered someone. We all make mistakes and learn from them but don't let people pull you down by judging you. Have self respect hold your head up and for the one's that see you as you truly are will be your friend and/or lover. Trust is the main thing in a relationship. Don't be in a relationship where you are always defending yourself especially when you haven't cheated. You shouldn't even have to explain your past and be caught telling a white lie because it isn't anyone's business. If it was we would all be stoned to death!! Don't beg and cry to him be strong and let yourself heal inside. He has alot of issues with himself he is struggling with. Something that you can't change and make better. You can't fix people-just be you and let someone love you the way you should be. Good Luck!
2007-02-02 08:17:00 · answer #4 · answered by holliemay 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Been there, so i can tell you from personal experience,if your past has dirt, from the beginning your relationship is in a world of hurt.Guys tend to not trust us for doing the same thing they do all the time.Crazy right, but truth is you can fight as much as you want, but he'll always be thinking about the other guys.Go ahead and try again maybe god will bless you, but honestly do you want a man who doesn't trust you.Good luck, and trust it ain't the end of the world.
2007-02-02 07:58:04 · answer #5 · answered by pvy_crazy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry you're feeling like that.
If it is worth fighting for, keep trying for a while at least.
It sounds like jealousy has already poisoned it to me though, and if he never really trusted you, I think you probably should be moving on.
I tend to not pressure my girlfriends into telling me all about their past loves and others, because it might make me jealous or try and see things that are not there. I think the fact that you ended up discussing your past (it sounds like in detail) is probably not a good sign.
I hope you get what you need, whatever you decide that is. Best of luck.
2007-02-02 07:47:14 · answer #6 · answered by Whateverandeverandamen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I bought the "Text you ex back" ebook and it has been a real help through possibly the hardest time of my life. It's an intensive guide that explains hot to bring your ex back using simple text messages. This is the site where you can find the whole system http://getyourexback.toptips.org
2014-09-24 14:50:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but this relationship sounds like a world of boring mistrust, insecurity and feelings of inadequacy.
Everyone has a past, everyone is entitled to a past and if two souls connect in the right way then a past is irrelevant. It is the present and the future you look towards.
2007-02-02 07:47:22 · answer #8 · answered by LadyRebecca 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree.. he'll never trust it .. i was sort of in the same situation with my ex.. i didn't lie.. i think i omitted some things.. and then he remembered me saying things.. that i was sure i said something different.. and anytime we argued he always brought it back to that.. even if it was something else..
do yourself a favour and just move on and remember to be more honest in your next relationship..
if you can't trust your boyfriend not to judge you by your past then perhaps he's not the boy for you
2007-02-02 07:47:11 · answer #9 · answered by steph 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave him... He is no suitable for you... Don't ever go with a guy that doesn't trust you... No matter how u love him, if a guy dun trust you, I see no point for you to love him so much just find another one but I know it is tough...
2007-02-02 07:51:59 · answer #10 · answered by Kyoko 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋