In what ways can a woman help a man she is close to with emotional problems he has? What kinds of things should she do, and what should she not do? How should she approach the matter? What are things women can help men with, and what, if any, can't they?
2007-02-01 18:12:18 · 4 answers · asked by fslcaptain737 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I am already aware of The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura- good answer, but so other people don't put it...
2007-02-01 18:46:23 · update #1
Read "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schlesinger. It is a great book filled with answers to the questions you asked and many more. The main idea of the book is how women can help the men they love.
2007-02-01 18:37:05 · answer #1 · answered by A dad & a teacher 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When your man is going through emotional problems, a woman has to support and comfort him and not criticize and blaming him for what he is going through. The woman should be strong and be able not to show her fear of what her man is going through. Instead of her also showing shock of what the man is going through, is supposed to comfort him that problems are normal things in life and he should take them lightly. Most of the times men while going through emotional problems lose their temper easily, as a woman by his side should swallow and control her temper. She is supposed to lead him in the right way of solving the problem by discouraging him of damaging thoughts.
2007-02-02 04:02:40 · answer #2 · answered by Mama A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the best things a woman can do is just listen when men seem upset, without voicing criticisms, judgments, or advice until a man finishes what he's saying. Men get a bad rap for not listening, but in my personal experience, women don't listen at all. Two sentences into expressing myself, and a woman interrupts, talking about her own problems (perhaps, in a competitive way), asking for details, or telling me to relax and get over it. If I speak up about it, I am made out to be deaf, in spite of the HOURS I spend listening at once. Men seem like they are not listening, but they are really processing what you are saying. It just takes a while to sink in, because we must brood on it later. Men like to list all their main points before getting into detail about any one. Men often pause to collect their thoughts, so wait a bit if you think they are finished. Interruptions can frustrate a man, causing him to forget things he wanted to convey, leaving things unresolved and festering. Many men hold on to childhood issues, because of the constant suppression of communication. This is compounded by advancing age, because a man is supposed to be over it already. Abuse, molestation, or military experiences will be particularly difficult to deal with. How can a man get over it, if no one will let him speak? If a man feels that no one will listen, he eventually will not bother trying to talk. Men often are not looking for sympathy, to be agreed with, or to be excused for their behavior, just understanding. Baby talk and other forms of condescension will not help, either, especially if they are done for the purpose of mocking the man, rather than a genuine but misguided attempt to help. Having one's feelings and experiences trivialized in this way is very demeaning. Because of Feminism and the burden of giving birth, some women seem to feel they have a monopoly on pain. Even if you feel this is true, don't convey it to him.
2007-02-02 02:55:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
as a women i believe that a women should just use common sense to guide her in helping a man emotionally. she should be able to offer support if he needs it in dealing with what he is going through. be the shoulder he can use to lean on. the things that she should not do it support him doing the wrong things like doing things that can harm him. she should be able to talk to him about the things that he is going through. encourages him to talk about the things that is in his mind be supportive and listen. she should definitely ignore his feelings and what he has to say. it is important if it is bother him. she should listen and comfort him but she shouldn't suggest anything unless it is needed or ask for. giving comments at the wrong time can make things worse for him and the situations. if they can help him then they should only be there to comfort and listen to his problems.
2007-02-02 02:47:30 · answer #4 · answered by Candee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋