My best friend Jessica who is also my co-wife (I didn't want to put that on the main question for everyone to know) got upset that our husband wouldn't let her drive a car for the past week so she walked to the store and bought a peice of ham from the meat department and came home and chopped it up into little chunks and put it inside her secret place. Basically, so my husband would become unclean if he had relations with her. Well, fortunately my husband went out with his friends tonight. Also, now Jessica feels really guilty and wants to remove this ham before he gets home, but says that little pieces seem stuck and I'm scared I might hurt her trying to get them out. What can we do? By the way, we can't drive so we couldn't go to the emergency room.
2007-02-01 14:29:38 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
Welcome back Little Angel, I've missed you. Did your father give you permission to ask questions again? This one is an old one. How did you get the ham out of her vagina the last time she did this? I seem to remember that oven mitts and tongs did the trick, that way you didn't have to touch the ham and get unclean yourself. By the way, have you had your ceremonial bath with your grandmother today?? And how is your grandfather? Is he still camped out in your yard? Did your husband forgive you for ruining his cd player? Has your father given you another breast exam lately?
2007-02-01 14:31:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Hell yeah she has ham in "her secret place." You are so full of it I don't know where to start. How come you cannot drive, are you like some captive slave child bride or something? How many wives does your husband have? This alone is illegal, and especially if you are a child, which you are certainly acting like.
Anyway, there is no hope for your "co-wife". She will die because the rotting meat inside of her will become bacteria infested and soon she will get a high fever and develop e. coli and die. Your best bet might be walking to the hospital and see if there is any way a miracle can be done to save her.
2007-02-01 14:43:34 · answer #2 · answered by SuzyBelle04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hope she didn't want kids. Whats wrong with you people? A woman's vagina has its own unique pH balance.Sometimes when we aren't feeling all that "fresh" like after our period or intercourse, it's because our pH balance is off a little.Think of the vagina as a delicate Eco system, now shove anything foreign, especially organic matter, up in there and leave it to stew and your gonna have one stinky skank in bed with you and your hubby. Maybe he can swap her for the skank he went out to bang that night. Honestly, what man wants to go out with his buddies when he's got 2 skanks at home, unless he's looking for more skanks. Aren't you a woman? You should know this stuff.
2007-02-01 14:47:15 · answer #3 · answered by daddiesslut88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG! Back when I was in high school, we did an experiment with ham. We put a cube of ham and left it in water. It was disgusting to see what came of it. You could actually see the parasites moving on the outside layers of the ham.
And she just put that in her body. Looks like the only one she's hurting in this situation is herself. I've never heard of such a thing.
Couldn't you have thought of somehting else?
All I can say is...... PUSH REALLY HARD.
That is just gross!
2007-02-01 14:41:06 · answer #4 · answered by Nunya 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok, first of all that was really dumb. you should never put things in that place. all i can say is have you tried a douche? maybe it will help flush out those things. I dont think i'll ever look at ham the same way again.
2007-02-01 14:33:15 · answer #5 · answered by insyracuse99 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the immortal words of Kunkee:
"How hard it is to put out a bag of crap that is on fire."
At first i disliked you because you were lying. Now that it's established that you are full of crap, you are better than the novels you buy at Rite Aid for a dollar.
You do know what a Rite Aid is, right?
2007-02-03 13:45:53 · answer #6 · answered by Libby G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I guess she learned her lesson. Sounds like ham is the least of both of ya'lls problems.
2007-02-01 14:35:09 · answer #7 · answered by K G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Little Angel strikes again?
Tell me, how did your relatives like their breast milk mac and cheese? Are you still embarassed about lap-tinkling your husband?
Jeez, how mentally ill does someone have to be to believe this?
2007-02-03 12:29:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's going to be an embarrassing trip in the ambulance when it starts to rot. Tell her it's supposed to smell life fish not pork(that's what I hear anyway).
2007-02-01 14:35:22 · answer #9 · answered by unicornfarie1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't drive I seriously doubt you can be on the internet, or even a computer for that matter.
2007-02-01 14:34:54 · answer #10 · answered by Always Confused 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋