I think I might be gay.?

Question

But I read stuff, like hate on this site, and wonder how people can stand to tell other people they're gay.

I'm only 15. Does it get easier?

Answer 1

Since you are 15, you may not be sure if you are gay or not; but that is something only you will know in time.

Once you tell someone a part of yourself that you have felt needed to be hidden, you no longer have to hide it from them. The more people you tell, the less you have to hide who you are. The less you have to hide, the more you realize that you are not the only one with these feelings.

I ended up telling other people who I was when I couldn't stand hiding who I was any longer. Instead of hiding, I was honest. Almost everyone I told was glad that I was honest with them. I have found that honesty is better than hiding.

Once you don't feel that you have to hide, you don't care about what other people say. They say these things because they do not know any gay people and are only afraid of what they do not know and do not understand.

Once you tell someone who you are, it gets easier everyday because that is when you care more about yourself than about what other people think.

Answer 2

It's like this. I'm 16 (almost 17 now) and I've been dealing with it since I was 12. First you tell you friends and they're usually ok with it. Then it gets out and the whole school finds out. Sure people say stuff about you behind your back, maybe laugh at you sometimes, but after awhile you get used to it and don't care anymore what people think. Eventually you'll be fine. I'm perfectly content with who I am and I could care less what some immature anti-gay person thinks. That's their problem. Although, telling family members is a bit more difficult, but they get used to it. Hope that helps. Good luck! If you have other questions my aim is ZumanityDelights. You'll be fine.

Answer 3

Telling someone you are gay is never easy. You need to ignore any of the negative comments that you recieve on this site. Those people are ignorant, and do not understand. I want to tell you that I am gay, and just recently told my parents. I am 20. I haven't told any of my friends yet. That should give you an idea of just how hard it is. It's not as though I believe that my friends will hate me, it's just the anticipation and concern about what they will think or say. Remember, there is nothing wrong with being gay. It is completely normal and in fact people are born gay. I know how difficult it is to come out to people, but I do think it will get easier as time goes by. Look at me, I'm 5 years older than you and still haven't told my friends. You have to give yourself time to come to terms with your sexuality. Don't be in any rush to tell others about it. Take all the time you need, because everyone is different and has their own feelings about it. Don't worry, I'm sure everything will work out fine.

Answer 4

The best thing to do is wait until you are more sure of your feelings and more comfortable with yourself. I started out by telling a couple of my best friends. They actually shocked me by telling me they already knew. As time went on I told more people. And it did get easier. Everyone in my life knows now. I figure that if someone has a problem with it, it's their problem not mine. I'm not going to hide who I am because of what other people think.

Answer 5

Dude instead of saying you are gay go with BI. You are way too young to decide you are gay. Think long and hard, this is something that will change you forever. Plus just because you get an erection from something about a guy doesn't mean you are gay It happens to a lot of people your age and even older.

Answer 6

It varies. I came out to my friends at about your age -- and rather doubt that there was anyone who didn't know when I graduated high-school -- yet I was voted most popular male in my class, most fatherly, most caring, and most talkative (always did have a big mouth) by my classmates. This was in a small rural school in a highly religious area. How did it happen? I love people, always did, and never hesitated or was phased. People quickly decided that who I slept with was incidental, and stopped worrying about it.

If you do not like confrontation and fear people, I wouldn't tell anyone but close friends now. It does get better however. The bigots are the bigots -- do not fear them, in fact, laugh at them -- there is nothing they hate worse; or, do as I do -- and answer factually, making sure you ONLY answer if you know more than they do on the topic they are using. They don't like that much either.

As you get older you will find (at least if you are in the north you will find) that almost no one cares. That is one of the reasons that those that do care are getting more hateful and more violent. Over 85% of all people from 25 years of age down -- support equal rights for gays. Repeated and numerically huge studies have proven that. So, people who DON'T support you in your age category, have to make even more noise. (the exact percentages will vary by geographic area, with far more phobes in Deep South and some parts of mid-west than in Northeast or West coast.)

Those people fall into two groups in my opinion. Group one consists of peole who were taught to hate -- often for religious reasons, but equally often out of ignorance -- some of them will get better. Group two -- the often more virulent group, are homosexual themselves, but hiding, and using their violent homophobia to make sure, subconsciously, that no one guesses. That has been pretty well proven by studies as well (see link below). The handful of conservatives were quick to assert that it wasn't really homosexual interest but disturbance that led to such a huge percentage of the homophobic males becoming aroused when exposed to male/male porn -- and what can I say? Sure, I get aroused all the time when something makes me angry?.... No, I just can't carry that sarcasm over. The reality is that at least something like 60% of the homophobic men in the study were at least bisexual themselves, which matches expected predictors actually -- the only homophobic boys I knew when I was a teen -- have ALL now at least come out to me privately when I've visited home -- usually cause they still live there and they hoped to get me to have sex with them -- but they have come out to me. This study therefore did not surprise me (and no, I wouldn't touch them -- I have a lover and am happy -- they are married to women they feel nothing for and are not. *grin,* that's what courage got me and cowardice got them.)

What you need to do right now is love yourself. Know that you are wonderful and awesome just as you are. You can do anything!!!! Believe in you, always, and be honest to yourself. Whatever you are is wonderful, just as you are. Before you know it you will have a cute boyfriend. Then think what fun you'll have.

I hope that I have helped a little, do not hesitate to email me if you want to talk.

Kindest thoughts,

Reyn
[e-mail]

PS and ignore Jack -- his answer is based in ignorance. I knew I was gay when I was 8 -- I just didn't find out the name for it until 11. You are NOT too young to know what you are. There is no deciding involved, except to decide whether to love yourself as you are or not, and you should.

PS wow -- still reading the other responses. Maildad or his friends will try to convert you. If you need it here is my site address -- take a good, thoughtful look at the sections under Bible if they start telling you that the Bible is the Word of God. It is good to be protected internally from the extremists. http://www.rebuff.org

Answer 7

Honey,nothing in this life is easy but it can get better so pay no attention to the homophobic gay bashers who post their bull crap on this site about the sins of being gay is and blah blah blah.
If you do figure out that you are gay then all I can say is to accept yourself and love who you are.

Answer 8

Be loud and proud,
the people on here that don't like us, are the ones you don't want to be around anyway.
Being gay is excellent, and you just wait till you find Mr. right then you will know what heaven is like.
Take care

Answer 9

Believe it or not, not everyone is like the homophobes on this site. Peole are becoming more open minded and accepting differences a little more each day.

Answer 10

I told my friends way before I told anyone else, such as my parents. I was 15 as well; I'm 17 now. Telling them and seeing how they reacted helped me to tell other people. I also knew my parents would take it relatively well. If your friends are really your friends, and your parents love you unconditionally, you shouldn't have any problems at all.