what do u do ?when you find chaos in your life?

Question

i was very happy but about 6 month iam very sad. someone betrayed caused i lost my favorit job .because of his act iam very sad and feel pain and anger in my heart .i think i cant never comeback to happy life again :(

Answer 1

The worst enemy of chaotic circumstance is resolution by way of deductive reasoning. Find the root of the chaos, and eliminate it.....The job market isn't booming, but if you have a prayerful mode of looking at things..God will help you.

Answer 2

You need to understand that life is way to short for you to feel this way! Except the fact that something bad has happened and move on. If it's that horrible it may take a little time, but there isn't anything in this would that can keep anyone on the "Unhappy Side" of life. I know someone that has lost first their dad, then older brother, then mom, then job, got into a vehicle wreck and lost his brand new(2005 at the time) Chevy Tahoe, and he has put all that behind him and focused on the now and whats to be. All without having to see a shrink, just a little bit of time with a good friend. And he is only 21, so buck-up and in the words of the great Bob Marley, "Don't worry, be happy. every little thing is gone-a be all right".

Answer 3

You are going to have to get past that anger. It is not hurting the person who deserves it, the person who betrayed you. It is hurting you. You actually win when you forgive them, it's not letting them off the hook. You will know better than to trust that person again, and in the future they might ask something of you and you are going to tell them to go jump in the lake. But until then, let go of the anger, figure out and find a new job you would like, maybe better than the last one.

I'm sorry you were betrayed. But look at it as a silver lining, and figure out the really good and better life you will make for yourself because of it.

Answer 4

I turn to the one person who is going to be with me regardless of what anyone else in the world decides to do. I turn to God. If your happiness is dependent upon others or the actions of others, then you're going to continuosly run into this issue. Realize where the true source of happiness comes from and all of the chaos belonging to the world will stay in the world and not in your heart.

Answer 5

Hi!......

First off im very sad to hear that you feel very sad at the moment and the reason you feel sad..........
But to answer your question and maybe help you, by thinking that you cant come back to life isn't going to help......i think you have got to try to think positively..........when one door closes, another one opens!! im sure you are very intelligent.......just try to be happy and forget what happened and perhaps learn from your experiences.......I hope this helps.......please feel free to email me on [e-mail]

Answer 6

Please don't think I'm being flip. You would benefit from going to www.The secret.com and watch the movie on line. It will help you get centered. If you have any problem finding it just email me. Or you can buy the book.

Answer 7

Oh, I've been through worse things than that! I still love life!!! You have to give all your problems to God. It will be okay. Then and only then will it be okay!

Answer 8

i stop everything and redirect myself from the chaos.

Answer 9

i turn to drugs but i wouldn't recommend it

Answer 10

When some chaos come into a person's life,
they to choose to love other people in this way!!

Love vs. Attachment

What is the world is the difference between loving a person and being attached to them ?
Love is the sincere wish for others to be happy, and to be free from suffering.
Having realistically recognized others' kindness as well as their faults, love is always focused on the other persons welfare. We have No ulterior motives to fulfull our self-interest, or to fulfill our desires; to love others simply because they exist.
Attachment, on the other hand, exaggertes others' good qualitities and makes us crave to be with them. When we're with them, we're happy, but when we're separated from them, we are often miserable. Attachment is linked with expectations of what others should be or do.
Is love as it is usually understood in our society
really love ? or attachment ? or even possibly for some, only lust.
Let us examine this a bit more. Generally we are attracted to people either because they have qualities we value or because they help us in some way. If we observe our own thought processes mindfully, and carefully - we'll notice that we look for specific qualities in others.
Some of these qualities we find attractive, others are those our parents, or society value.
We examine someone's looks, body, education,
financial situation, social status. This is how most of us decide on whether or not the person holds any true value to us.
In addition, we judge people as worthwhile according to how they relate to us. If they help us, praise us, make us feel secure, listen to what we have to say, care for us when we are sick or depressed, we consider them good people, and it is this type of people we are most likely to be more attracted to.

But this is very biased, for we judge them only in terms of how they relate to "us", as if we are the most important person in the world.
After we've judged certain people to be good for us, whenever we see them it appears to us as if goodness is coming from them, but if we are more aware, we recognize that we have projected this goodness onto them.

Desiring to be with the people alot who make us feel good, we become emotional yo-yo's -
when we're with these people, we're Up, when we're not with these people, we're Down.

Furthermore, we form fixed concepts of what our relationships with those people will be and thus have expectations of them. When they do not live up to our expectations of them, we're very disappointed, or may become angry !
We want them to change so that they will they will match what we think they are. But our projections and expectations come from our own minds, not from the other people.
Our problems arise not because others aren't
who we thought they we're, but because we mistakenly thought they were something they
aren't.
Checklist: "I Love You if __________ "
What we call love is most often attachment.
It is actually a disturbing attitude that overestamates the qualities of another person.
We then cling to tightly to that person, thinking our happiness depends on that person.
"Love, on the other hand, is an open and very calm, relaxed attitude. We want someone to be happy, and free from suffering simply because they exist. While attachment is uncontrolled and much too sentimental, Love is direct and powerful. Attachment obscures our judgment and we become impatient, angry, and impartial, helping only our dear one's and harming those who we don't like. Love builds up others, and clarifies our minds, and we
access a situation by thinking of the greatest good for everyone. Attachment is based on
selfishness, while Love is founded upon cherishing others, even those who do not look very appealing to the eyes. Love looks beyond
all the superficial appearences, and dwells on the fact that they are just like us: they want inner peace, happiness, and want to avoid suffering. If we see unattractive, dirty, ignorant people, we feel repulsed because our selfish minds watn to know attractive, intellectual, clean, and talented people. Love, on the other hand, never evaluates others by these superficial standards and looks much deeper into the person. Love recognizes that regardless of the others' appearances, their experience is the same as ours: they seek inner peace, to be happy, to be free from sufferings, and to do their best to avoid problems.
When we're attached, we're not mentally and emotionally free. We overly depend on and cling to another person to fulfill our mental and especially our emotional needs. We fear losing the person, feeling we'd be incomplete without him.
This does not mean that we should suppress our emotional needs or become aloof, alone and totally independent, for that too does not solve the problem. We must simply realize our unrealistic needs, and slowly seek to eliminate them. Some emotional needs may be so strong that they can't be dissolved immediately.
If we try to suppress them or pretend they do not exist, we become anxious, insecure, falling into a depression. In this case, we can do our best to fulfill our needs while simultaneously working gradually to subdue them.
"The core problem is we seek to be loved, rather than to love. We yearn to be understood by others rather than to understand them. In all honesty, our sense of emotional insecurities comes from the selfishness obscuring our own
minds. 'We can develop self-confidence by recognizing our inner potential to become a selfless human being with many, many magnificient qualities, then we'll develop a true and accurate feeling of self-confidence. And
then we'll seek to increase true love, without attachments, to increase compassion, to cultivate patience and understanding, as well as generousity, concentration and wisdom.'

'Under the influence of attachment we're bound by our emotional reactions to others. When they are nice to us, we're happy. When they ignore us, or speak sharply to us, we take it personally and are unhappy. But pasifying attachment doesn't mean we become hard-hearted. Rather, without attachment there will be space in our hearts and minds for genuine Affection and Impartial Love for them.
We'll be actively involved with them.
If we learn to subdue our attachments, we can most definately have successful friendships and personal relationships with others !! These relationships will be richer because of the freedom and respect - the relationships will be based on. We'll care about the happiness and the misery of all human beings equally, simply because everyone is the same in wanting and needing inner peace, happiness, and not wanting to suffer. However, our lifestyles and interests may be more compatible with those of some people more so than with others, and that is alright. In any case, our relationships will be based on mutual Love, mutual interests, and the wish to help each other in life.