My girlfriend left me after 3 years to whom i thought was my best friend?

Question

So, 2 days before my birthday i get a call that my now ex is not feeling the same she used to. Now i knew that i might have drawn her to this point because she had just turned 21 and was exposed to bar life, an lately she has been going out and im the typical over protective jealous boyfriend cause im worried about her and dont want anything to happen. Well, i thought that is what drawed her away from me i think wrong, well on her 21st my friend that i thought was my friend admittly drunk that he was in love with her and do any whatever to break us up. Well 2 months later we broke up. later after we broke up to find out he had always been there when i wasnt not knowing if anything is happening but once we broke up suppsoively they started sleeping with each other and now they're still together over 1 month past break up supposively. ive given her space trying to keep it short on comunication. id love to have her back but why? and she wants to be friends but how? Could she love me again

Answer 1

you seem like a really nice guy, i think u could do so much better! u just need to get over her!! here are some hints!!

Bond with other Singles.
At any given time, you probably have a mix of friends in loving relationships as well as those searching for love. Don't be afraid to look-up single friends you haven't seen or spoken to in awhile and make plans for Friday and Saturday night. You'll stay busy on the weekend and maybe even rekindle an old friendship.

Start a Social Hobby.
If there is a hobby or activity you have been meaning to try for the first time, or take-up again, this is your chance. Focus on activities that allow you to meet new and interesting people. Examples might include a cooking class, sports league, or bridge club.

Go Easy on the Next Person you Meet.
Beware of continuing unfinished business with the next person you meet. If you didn't have a chance to truly close the door on your last relationship, don't project your open issues on the next unsuspecting soul. See the new person as a clean slate and allow the relationship to unfold with no connections to your past.

Don't Sling Shot your Ex.
It can be very tempting, particularly on lonely nights, to look up your ex or accept an invitation from your ex for a rekindle. The more you fall back on your old ways, the harder it will be to truly move on. Don't fall for the short term satisfaction of a night out or easy hook-up at the expense of stirring up all the hurt from the breakup.

Apply What You've Learned.
Take out a journal and write down everything that went well versus what could have been better in your relationship. Be honest since you're the only one looking at the entry. What could you do better next time? What positive traits did your ex possess that you should look for in the next relationship, or maybe even incorporate into your own style?

Talk About Something Else.
Everyone goes through a period of venting to their friends and family about what went wrong and how your ex deserves to go straight to prison. It's okay to do a little venting, but spare your inner circle from an endless tirade for months at a time. Commit to yourself that the next time you call a close friend, you'll focus exclusively on them. This will help you get out of your head for awhile and start feeling normal again.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

You're as angry, confused and sad as I am. Difference is, I've been though this before, notably this afternoon.
Look. She's been hiding her feelings from you. She's been uncommunicative. Now she wants to be your best friend? Same as mine, only we've been together ten years. And as of today, she's gone. BUT she still says I'm her best friend. But would a "best friend" do this to you?
No, she can't love you again. Yes, your future with her is dead. But -- and I'm trying to come to grips with this as I type it -- your (our) future is new. New. Now, you and I have a hard section road ahead of us, and the first few miles will be rocky. And in the end, it will be better without her.
I don't feel any better typing this. It's going to take a long time. I wish I was someone else. But that's all junk. Just for now, I'm going to take one step at a time. Go to work, find a new place to live and move there. No pleading. No begging. All that just makes us look and feel worse. Let's just live somewhere else, and continue our work in the world. That's my solution, anyway. Now if I can just get this hole out of my chest--

Answer 4

I know I'm not answering the anser to your question but this is what I think... I think that so far you have done a good job so far, you're not acting vulnerable, and you're keeping the lines of communication open. I don't think you should get back with her because of what your friend said and because of the situations that followed thereafter. Things happen for a reason. It may not always be what we like or want, but it is something that is meant to happen. Goodluck

Answer 5

You answered your own predicament, why would u want her back. You need to move on & find another girl or work on urself. Just think, how can you possibly think that you & her will have a strong loving relationship with all of the baggage from your 1st time around (i.e. her sleeping & dating your friend) & she obviously doesn't want to be with you.
GOOD LUCK
You seem like a really nice guy, so find a really nice girl!

Answer 6

She could love you again. She'd probably also leave you again for someone else. Want that?

Move on.

Also, your friend deserves an *** whooping for screwing his buddy over for a chick.

So take care of that, then you'll feel better. Then MOVE ON.

Answer 7

I dont think it matters if she ever loves you again she is not worth it and neither is your supposively best friend all i know is you need to find some one who you know you can trust and I dont think that she is worth.

Answer 8

the total *****!! my ex bf did a similar thing, and i told him to stuff his friendship. She needs to be shown she can't use you, and even if she could love you again would you really want her to??

Answer 9

Move on. Don't waste any more time on her. Lost Faith Is Never Gained.

Answer 10

Maybe she can love you agiain , but you shouldn't trust her. Suggestion: Dump her.