Heres the situation my friend is getting married to a guy but their having problems she doesnt want to be tied up were she has to sit around and wait for him to get home from work but he wont let her out.He thinks she is cheating but she really isnt.In fact the truth is he is cheating cause he thinks she is.But thats not it hes cheating with his cousin. Not too mention he is 19 she is 17. He also cheated on her with a 13 yr old girl. Should she dump this sorry loser?
2007-02-01 08:39:07 · 26 answers · asked by AlyKat 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh i forgot to mention one thing my friend is also having his baby. he doesnt know the baby might not be his. How should she tell him?
2007-02-01 09:12:18 · update #1
Suffice to say, marriage is a sacred bond between 2 people (as you already know). It comes down to how much this guy really loves your friend. From the looks of it, the guy does not seem to care much for her. Your friend will have to stand up to her fiance. If she does not, she will end up in a very bad, unhappy marriage. If such a relationship is based on cheating and subordination, such a marriage will not last. She will need to turn the tables and confront him. If he still is doing what he is doing and how he is acting, she has every right to leave him, though emotionally sad she may be (at first, but hopefully as she becomes more independent, she will be a happier person with self-empowerment). Not only that, but a marriage should be where both people should have equal say and equal rights. In order for her not to get bossed around, she will need to stand up to him and most likely, should break up such a relationship. She deserves better. But it is her that needs to take the initiative of leaving this relationship. The more she postpones this, the more hurt she will be. I would have her talk to her fiance and tell him that such a relationship will not work. She needs the courage to leave him. But in order to do this, I would suggest you ensure her and let her know that you will stick by her side forever more. She may need to learn to start living on her own [again].
2007-02-01 08:57:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is wrong on so many levels!!
He's a cheater, and possibly the worst kind. First, cheating because he thinks she's cheating on him is LAME. Secondly, cheating with his cousin? That's nasty AND wrong. Then cheating on her with a 13-year-old girl? Does he know he can go to jail for that? I sincerely hope he's using protection. Either way, he's a disgusting human being that needs to be left alone before she gets caught up in something she cannot get out of.
And to top it all off, he's controlling, if I'm reading this right. That is the true mark of an infidel, not a man that she should marry by any means.
Tell your friend to give back the Engagement Ring, and get as far away as possible from him.
2007-02-01 16:50:33 · answer #2 · answered by Andrew B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she needs to dump him. Who wants to be with someone who you can't trust, does she really want to live with that for the rest of her life? Also, it is not good if he is controlling her, minor situations like that can lead into bigger problems in the long wrong.
Tell her that there are so many other men out there that will be dieing to treat her with better respect and loyalty. Im sure she deserves it.
2007-02-01 16:42:41 · answer #3 · answered by katherinebrown06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! he is already controlling her by not lettign her go out! why get married when you dont have the most importatn thing in a relationship TRUST! she needs to leave asap. she is too young to be gettign marriedn anyways. why marry a contorlling and most likely abusive pedophile. he slept with a 13 years old! she definately needs to get rid of this loser! tell her everything you know. love is blind so she may not be seeing all of this right now. marrying him will be a mistake. he does not respect her nor trust her she needs to leave NOW!
2007-02-01 16:42:58 · answer #4 · answered by laa dee da 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
his past is the best way to see what he will do in the future, he is also controlling,what she sees in him now will only get worse once he has her trapped in the marriage. she should end it with him, as if all the signs are there now, this is showing her the out, its up to her if she takes it or not. she would be a fool to get mixed up with a man like this, but as they say love is blind. he is a player, and will be a player maybe for life, makes for a very sad marriage.
2007-02-01 16:47:08 · answer #5 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wants a husband, not a jailer. This at least at 25 years of age, not at 17. At 17 she needs to live her own life, ALONE!!!
2007-02-01 16:42:46 · answer #6 · answered by JADE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to run far far away from him. I would also look into reporting him to the police for statutory rape of the 13 yr old.
2007-02-01 16:44:49 · answer #7 · answered by kreativekate711 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend needs a HUGE reality check!!! Why OH WHY do woman think they can't do better!!!???? If she chooses to stay with that man....she's in for a very miserable, lonely and sad life. Your her friend....if you haven't already told her...tell her that there are men out there.....GOOD MEN....and this guy is definitely NOT one of them! She has her whole life ahead of her....why tie herself down to someone who won't appreciate her!
2007-02-01 16:44:36 · answer #8 · answered by Miloree 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Call the police. He is a sex offender!
2. Yes, she should. Your friend can do better than that loser.
2007-02-01 16:41:58 · answer #9 · answered by Blanca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's totally up to her to break up with the guy, regardless of everything.
If her self-esteem is sooooooo low that she can't recognize the lose/lose situation she's in, then all YOU can do is be there for her when she cries or is ready to leave him.
2007-02-01 16:49:34 · answer #10 · answered by Ella 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋