Should I go to my Ex wife's mother's funeral? I haven't communicated with my Ex in 8 years.?

Answer 1

If your ex has remarried or you guys ended it on bad terms don't. If you guys ended things very civilly or if you share children you can stop by the wake and pay your respects. If anything the best way to play it is to send a card and maybe some flowers expressing your condolenscenses.

Answer 2

I think it depends on your relationship with her family. If you haven't spoken in 8 years there must be some reason. If you have underage children who have requested your presence then go and stay in the back if you don't feel comfortable. If your presence will bother the grieving family then just send a condolence card to your ex.

Funerals are for the living. Do what you feel would be best for all parties involved. A lot of time the only time you ever see people is at weddings or funerals so it would not be un natural for you to pay respects to your ex mother in law.

Answer 3

I would say it depends on the relationship you've had with both of them after the divorce. If you had a bad divorce and don't even talk to your ex then maybe just sending flowers would be nice. But if you've managed to stay friends and do still talk then I think she would appreciate it. Especially if you were married for a long time.

My parents divorce was brutal, and 13 years later they still don't talk to each other. And when my grandfather died 6 years ago during my first pregnancy I asked my dad to go because they were all pretty close. But he didn't go and no one really expected him to I guess. Although, he did send flowers from his whole family to the funeral home and even though my mom didn't show it I'm sure she thought that it was a nice thought.

Sorry to hear about your ex's loss.

Answer 4

Did you have a good relationship with her when she was your mother in law? Do you think you are on "good" terms with your ex? Do you have children together? If you have kids, you might go, but sit in the back, and if your ex seems upset with your being there, I would just offer your condolences and leave, so you don't upset her anymore than she is right now. Of if you don't go to the funeral, perhaps you can go to the visitation or memorial service. If you decide to do neither, I would still send flowers.

Answer 5

The fact that you are contemplating this action tells me that you cared for her mother. With that in mind, the best thing you could do is to contact your ex-wife and ask her if you can attend. Express your sorrow and condolences to your ex-wife, and let her know that you would very much like to attend her mother's funeral to say goodbye to her mother.

Please keep in mind, that if your marriage ended badly, your ex-wife may not wish to have you there. If that is the case, you need to respect her wishes. Perhaps you could send a condolence card and some flowers.

Answer 6

Why not. It's out of respect. If you had a good relationship with your mother-in-law then it's only a respectful thing to do. You are a adult and this is a adult situation there shouldn't be a problem. At this moment in time when one passes it shouldn't matter if its your ex's of if it's a man down the street. Just go and pay your respect and leave.

Answer 7

Depends on your relationship with the ex's mother and your ex. My mother would never want my ex at her funeral. She has absolutely no respect for him so him showing up would be an insult to her.

Answer 8

It depends on the reasons for the divorce and if you have kept in touch with your ex-wife's family. If you have kept in touch since the divorce, or if any of her family were the one to tell you of the death/funeral, then you could attend. You could also attend if there was no animosity between your ex-wife and her parents.
Your question suggests you had respect/affection for your ex-MIL so I say you could attend the funeral.

Answer 9

You know what, these are the really difficult questions in life. I went through this also and finally decided to attend.
It is a matter of how well you got along with your mother-in-law and any feelings you had for her. If you loved and respected your mother-in-law you should go. If she was an evil woman than you do not owe anone an automatic appearance.
Of course you need to temper your final decision with "how will this affect my ex-spouse." I think if it is clearly going to turn in to a disruptive shouting match you need to stay away. If she won't mind or might even appreciate, then you are free to go.

Answer 10

If you feel about your ex mother in law the way I feel about mine, then go. My goal in life is to video tape my ex mother in laws autopsy. I want to see what is inside that THING to make her the way she is. (BTW, I'm a forensic photographer, and legal videographer so it's standard routine to me.) My ex MILs idea of fun is cleaning toilets. The only reason she closes her eyes during sex is because she can't stand to see people having fun.