i devorsed my wife 3 years ago after finding out she was having an affair,we have 2 children and share equall custody i buy their clothes,pay for holidays,parties,and other recreation when they are with me.my x has now married lives in a large house and regulary goes away on holidays abroad australia,italy spain,but does not allways take the children im lucky if i can afford aweeks camping in skegness. i also live with my partener who i met 2 years ago she has a young daughter, we live in a small 2 bed council house and allways struggle with bills. i can no longer afford child maintenance. i need advice on what to do, will i lose access to my children do i have to pay.
2007-02-01 08:03:22 · 19 answers · asked by paul c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sounds like you need it re assessed if you pay through the csa ring them ,if its direct to her see a solicitor.
2007-02-01 08:07:20 · answer #1 · answered by Nutty Girl 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Depending on where you're at, you may want to go back to court.
1. If you share joint physical custody (50/50), but it is not recorded that way in the court papers, you may want to go back to court so that the court papers reflect the actual amount of custody that you have. This may adjust the total child support you owe.
2. File with the court to get an adjustment to the child support. This would require you and your ex-wife submitting financial documentation to the court. If she is making considerably more money, than your contribution may change, based on the child support calculation.
This is just my experience with the CA court system. You should check out your state/county court website to see what type of information is available.
If you do not pay your child support, it does NOT mean that you will lose access to your children. Custody and Support are two separate issues, and lack of payment of child support does not mean that loss of custody. You should be aware, though, that the county will garnish your wages if you do not pay.
2007-02-01 09:04:03 · answer #2 · answered by ms_lain_iwakura 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a similar position but reversed - I am the woman. I went to a lawer about access for my ex a couple of years ago and she said that He does not pay to see his children he gives you money towards the upkeep of them. Basically, she legally cant stop you seeing them if you dont pay.
That doesnt mean she wont. Women can be right b++++es. I would suggest having a chat. Dont bring up how much money she has and what she is able to to cos that isnt an excuse.
Ask if you can drop the money you give for a little while just to give you time to get yourself back on your feet. Meanwhile you will still take the kids as normal giving her free time with her new parnter.
If you is a reasonable woman hopefully she will agree.
Good luck
2007-02-01 08:12:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You will not lose the right to see your children. Petition the court in which your child support order originated from and ask for a hearing. You can explain to the judge the hardships you are having at this time and they will do a financial work sheet with your income and your ex's income. The judge can lower your payment to $25 a month per child until you get on your feet again. Do not allow yourself to fall behind on these payments for too long. It ruins your credit, they can suspend your license, garnish your wages, keep your income tax refunds, and even throw you in jail. So, go file for a hearing asap. You do not need a lawyer you can do this simply and easily with the judge. Good luck to you
2007-02-01 08:20:22 · answer #4 · answered by Miss Crickett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably will get half the value of the house, BUT he will also be ordered to pay half the marital debts so he will have to pay part of the mortgage payments or give her the whole value of the house. And no matter what he WILL be paying child support. As for alimony that depends on how long they were married, if she was a stay at home mom, how long since she worked last, and the reasons the marriage ended (was he cheating?). Anyway he will not be getting a windfall of cash from this divorce and he will at least have to pay child support and part of the debts.
2016-03-29 00:18:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The courts see money and access as two separate entities......
Your relationship with them is the most important in the courts eyes.......
Explain to her your situation if you have that sort of relationship
She can only go to the Child support agency if you don't pay, and they will assess what you have coming in and going out and if you can not afford anything they won't make you pay..........
She can't have what you have not got, or sort out what you can sensibly afford and just give her that and say you will no longer be helping out with holidays and parties and everything that is non essential in there life
2007-02-01 08:11:48 · answer #6 · answered by xXx Orange Breezer xXx 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you will lose access to your children it depends on what type of person your ex is, if you went to court i cannot see a judge denying your right to see your children especially when you seem to have such an active role in their life and your ex doesn't depend on your money and as remarried. From personal experiance my nephews father who as been ordered by the court to pay maintance and never does as had no action taken against him. You should try talking to your ex and explaining but if that is not possible remember they are your flesh and blood and if you treat them right they will want to see their father. Good luck.
2007-02-01 09:17:04 · answer #7 · answered by jane h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so sorry your going through it just like so many i know. legal advice is the only way, even if every letter costs £50.! no money is worth loosing access to your kids. re-assessment of payments is needed. the law favours mums (right sometimes-wrong sometimes) but when the main child carer doesn't give a stuff about the ex, especially when their circumstances have improved, most judges can see it. maybe court judgement is needed. legal aid? justice for dads organisations? good luck.
2007-02-01 08:33:45 · answer #8 · answered by mole 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't pay your child support, she can have your wages garnished...they will just go direct to your employer and take a percentage out of each check- before you even get it.
I'm sorry that you're ex wife cheated, but you still need to support your kids- they didn't have anything to do with what happened!
Don't be a deadbeat dad!
2007-02-01 08:27:14 · answer #9 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go back to court and ask them to re assess your payments. If you share joint custody this should be considered in child support payments. Remember though, supporting your chilren will be the courts first priority, not your lifestyle of your partner and her child.
2007-02-01 22:24:30 · answer #10 · answered by freebird 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
spousal maintance and child support are two different things....if x wife is remarried spousal maintance should immediately stop---u may need to go to court to do this...child support remains in effect until those children are 18 years old and yes this is your financial responsibility...now u may wish to go back to court to have this amount reduced...if u wish to remove this amount entirely then u would have to release all parental rights to your children....not a good thing
2007-02-01 08:18:15 · answer #11 · answered by sunbun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋