We broke up for various reasons. He liked women friends, I didnt like him having women friends so he hid them from me. He didnt have affairs but I didnt like him having a seperate life that I wasnt allowed to know about. How do we reconcile such differences? Now I am alone with my daughter and he is alone with no one. All because of my inability to allow him to have women friends. What can I do to get over this hurt?
2007-02-01 07:16:09 · 31 answers · asked by jennyve25 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
also I did NOT have male friends, and if I did I wouldnt socialize with them behind his back because he got jealous.
2007-02-01 07:24:19 · update #1
also he made these friends after we got together, has admitted he finds them attractive and does want to spend time with them alone..not including me. He didnt tell me about them I busted him hanging out with them after he was away from home for quite a while and not awnsering his phone.
2007-02-01 07:28:34 · update #2
u have every right to expect to be the one and only, i myself would think it quite strange if my boyfriend had women friends. he should have no life your not allowed to know about, those who have nothing to hide hide nothing, and how do u know he didn't have affairs? he shouldn't be having women friends, that's a slap in the face for u, an insult. u can't reconcile the differences, unless he is willing to give up these women.
2007-02-01 09:10:36 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should have let him have women friends but they should have included you also! So if you all went out together that would be fine. Or they could come over to your house as long as you are there. If you have a problem with that then you might have a problem! ! ! If you just didn't like him going out or spending time with a female alone I think you are justified! Your husband shouldn't have wanted to spend time alone with other women!
10 years of happy marriage and we share all friends male and female!
2007-02-01 07:20:33 · answer #2 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My best friend is a man and this comes from years and years of going through heartbreaks and divorce when two people have grown up around each other and been there through some of the hardest parts of your life talking and giving advice to each other and can keep a bond of trust no matter who comes or goes in our life and no matter what others say about the two of you that is true friendship.
2016-03-29 00:11:21 · answer #3 · answered by Rosa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all i agree with you...men can never have just female friends, if they do its always cause they want something more from them attention, sex, whatever, this i learned the hard way... second of all i think you should just forget him and move on with your lives...he will never change thats who he is, if he cant get enough from you he will always be going elsewhere and eventually it will lead to something else...my suggestion is just move on and find someone who is into you and only you and doesnt need other female relationships...it was your ex's loss and i bet he will find someone else soon with all the female attention he gets elsewhere, so dont even worry about him being all alone right now...just be strong and move on yourself you will be much happier in the end.
2007-02-01 07:28:27 · answer #4 · answered by ღCCღ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I understand. We are jealous. But, girl friends are not bad as long as you know them and they are not going out together alone. invite his girl friends ovewr get to know them well. If they are married their husbands probably feel the same about your man being friends with their wifes so invite them over for dinner and you'll be cool. Girl friends for a guy is not all that to make about it speacially if you broke up because of them. That's dumb. Call him tell him your sorry and jealous and that you will try to comprehend him. He won't tell you about his friends because you dont let him. Give him confidence and trust. You will be the happiest cuple that is what I did and we don't argue not once.
2007-02-01 07:22:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
You should be happy to have a fella that relates well to women. Also be aware that many women would be jealous of such a situation. Get back with him and keep a supply of chill pills handy ...
2007-02-01 07:22:00 · answer #6 · answered by zappafan 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I feel like if he really wanted to be with you he should've dropped the women friends. But also if you trusted him he should be able to have female friends.(especially if they were his friends before you two got together) The bottom line is that both of you should try it again and compromise. When I got married I kept my female friends, my wife had to get used to them, but I know not to make any more female friends, though.
2007-02-01 07:21:51 · answer #7 · answered by carlos b 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I assume you have no male friends then.
You need to trust in a relationship and he has not given you any reason to doubt him. You will be alone the rest of your life unless you learn to trust.
Sounds more like jealousy on your end.
You have created this situation on your own and you are the only one that can make it right.
2007-02-01 07:22:21 · answer #8 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You needed more self confidence, and one spouse shouldn't try to control the other. Did you have any friends that were men? Maybe you need to get back together. Forcing people into extremes causes them to lie. I.E. you forbade him to associate with women, but women can be wonderful platonic friends. You should have been friends with them too, instead of being jealous.
2007-02-01 07:19:55 · answer #9 · answered by Year of the Monkey 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Why not be friends yourself with his other female friends? I think you just feel left out. It is partially his fault for not including you but he may not realize that you would accept being in his circle of friends. I am sure his friends would like to include you if they knew you wanted to be with them. Tell him!
2007-02-01 07:23:04 · answer #10 · answered by dreamgirl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋