My fiance and I are arguing. I think that a man involved in a serious relationship shouldn't go to strip clubs because it is disrespectful to the other person. He says it's no big deal and it's ok to go with the guys for a few drinks and I shouldn't get so upset over it. Am I being rediculous?
2007-02-01 05:42:24 · 33 answers · asked by hailesellase 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I've been to a strip club before so I know what they're like
2007-02-01 05:49:14 · update #1
I agree with some of the answers to the fact that I wouldn't want my fiance to come home to have sex with me when he's all horny from looking at strippers. I want him to have sex with me because I make him horny.
2007-02-01 10:01:49 · update #2
To hossferatu's1776whatever's comment, I did not pressure my fiance to propose to me. It was completely out of the blue I wasn't even expecting it. I'm not poo-pooing anybody's answers (unless they're absurd) I really want to know what you all think that's why I'm asking.
2007-02-01 12:03:53 · update #3
You are not being ridiculous. You are within your rights to ask your fiance to refrain from going to strip clubs. If YOU think it is a big deal, then it IS a big deal. No good can come from visiting strip clubs. A bunch of drunk, horny men, surrounded by scantily clad women and prostitutes... this is not a healthy environment. If your fiance doesn't respect you or your wishes, there is a serious problem. Your fiance may be a sex addict. I ought to know, I am a recovering sex addict.
2007-02-01 05:48:45 · answer #1 · answered by Jack Chedeville 6 · 4⤊ 2⤋
no you are not hes selfish these men just dont get it when your in a relationship your not supposed to go out and pay to see other naked people I used to be a hostess in a very well known strip club called scores and the stuff ive seen all these pigs that were married coming in paying hundreds and thousand of dollars to see these women take off there clothes it would make me sick thinking omg what if when i get married my husband will do that to me then there are the super pigs that go to the "backrooms" or vip sections where they pay extra for well extra if you dont believe me google scores prostitution it was in the news last week how cops were offered sex for extra money now why would a happy man in a good relationship that has a good girlfriend,wife etc.. go to a place like that then it makes us think is that what they want? Am i not hot enough?? Does he want other women? there are people that will disagree with me and mostly men but it is my opinion that any man that is in a serious relationship has no business in a strip club if hes "happy" with his women that is so0 selfish and disrepectful think of this how would he feel if you and the girls went to Chippindales?? Hed prob $hit himself they dont think about our feelings and its messd up so No you are not wrong its how you feel and as your man he should respect that and your bond should mean more to him then some sleezy trashy dancer that is only looking to get all of his money from him and go home
2007-02-01 05:53:39 · answer #2 · answered by bkgrl718 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I am willing to bet you give him the stink eye when you catch him checking out a girl on the street (and believe me, he does). Like so many people have said, men are visual creatures. FACT. You just need not be so jealous. Trust is the one issue to have in a marriage... and you are not even married yet. Honestly, who gives a flying F*ck if he's looking at another girl. He Chose you, RIGHT? Or did you pressure him into a proposal, too? Stop being so insecure and let him have a little fun.
On another note,,, if he's spending the rent money to go to these strip clubs, then yeah, you should be a little piss'd. But if it's his money and he wants to go a few times a year, then who cares? Believe me, there are prettier girls out there, and some of them actually take their clothes off. And a lot of GUY's (and some girls) pay to see that........time to let a guy be a guy, honey.
yes, you are being rediculous. Be a modern woman
2007-02-01 06:15:31 · answer #3 · answered by hossferatu1174 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I know I am a guy so you may not like my answer. I think it is OK. The biggest thing to make a relationship work is trust. I personally think a couple should let their partners do what they want too. For example I like to go to bars and watch live bands. My wife hates it she complains all the time but I was doing long before I met her. I think if you trust him you know he wont cheat on you. I don't think a woman or men should try and change their partner if he does something you don't like and he did it before you met him you should except him for who he is. If he truly loves you he wont cheat on you. Besides it is almost impossible to have sex with a stripper unless you pay her a lot of money. Many woman will let there man go to the bars with their buddies but they won't let them go to a strip club. It is a lot easier to have sex with a girl that you met at a bar than to have sex with a stripper. Another thing is if he goes to a strip club he will be horny and when he comes home to you he will want sex so it is good for you. I think you should just trust him and if he truly loves you he will not cheat. On the other hand if there is something you want to do he should let you do it too.
2007-02-01 05:57:58 · answer #4 · answered by ♫Rock'n'Rob♫ 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I go out with some guy friends every couple months, but that's just me. It totally depends on what you think about strip clubs. If you end up taking others' advice and going to the club just once for the experience, you might end up hating it even more and then the argument would get even bigger. I would tell the guy to go to the bar for some drinks and then go shopping together at Agent Provacateur ;)
2007-02-01 05:51:32 · answer #5 · answered by jerk19magnet 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was recently in Vegas with my fiance for a wedding, and I ended up going with the guys to the bachelor party at a strip club. Of course I always thought the worst in the past when they were at the strip clubs, so I was eager to see what REALLY goes on there.
It was pretty tame! The men are NOT allowed to touch the girls at all, so no worries there...and if you go with them, the strippers actually pay more attention to the girls than the boys.
I got my fiance and I a 'group' lap dance with a very beautiful woman, and he told me later that it was the best strip club experience he ever had.
I think every now and then is fine, and now that I've seen it for myself, no worries!
2007-02-01 05:48:48 · answer #6 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
I dont like when my husband goes when he is out of town on business because he keeps a lot from me and then I find out later what happened but I think if they are honest about it then it may be okay. I went with my husband and we had a wonderful time, he enjoyed it more with me there so maybe go with him in the future if he insists on going and see how it goes. I dont mind the whole "strip club" part that much, but when he goes alone and is paying for lapdances and private rooms and things then I have a big problem with that and he isnt honest about it so then I have to wonder, ya know? But when we go together it is really really fun!
2007-02-01 05:48:52 · answer #7 · answered by MommyOf2 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If your man loves you, he would have no desire to see other women naked dancing around on poles. He can have drinks with his buddies at other places which are decent. He's being disrespectful to you. If he loves and cares about you and the relationship, he will stop going. If he doesn't stop going after he knows how you feel and how much it upsets you, then he doesn't love you.
Alot of these guys responding to you are saying your man will be honry and come home and have sex with you. Why on earth would you want to have sex with your man who got horny over another woman????
2007-02-01 05:55:04 · answer #8 · answered by Pinky 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
In Atlanta, there are many strip clubs and one of them is for both men and women. The men sit on one side looking at the girls and the women sit on the other side watching men. There's nothing wrong with it besides, he can't touch those women but when he gets home, who gets all of the benefits? You do. He loves you and he wants to be there for you. If I were you, I'd be helping him go to these clubs. Just think about it. He goes, gets all hot and bothered then comes home to find you there waiting for him. Maybe with a candle light dinner or glass of wine wearing a sexy night gown. What's the first thing that is going to go through his mind?
I don't think I need to tell you who gets the benefits.
2007-02-01 05:54:25 · answer #9 · answered by Kevin A 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I am a married (for over 27 years) man. I have never been to a strip club and never intend to go to one. Personally I feel that these activities are disrespectful to the women working there, any partner a man might have, and also shows a lack of self respect. One would hope that at some point the patrons of these establishments would realize that women really aren't objects for their fanasies but actual walking, talking, thinking human beings who have the same feelings that they do.
2007-02-01 05:48:14 · answer #10 · answered by toff 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋