Suggestions for helpful grieving after losing a pet?

Question

I recently had to put down my 18 year old cat that had been in my life for 17 years and I would very much appreciate some helpful grieving tips that might have been helpful to you. It's been a very hard week...

Answer 1

My cat died about 6 months ago, and he was very close to me.
It was really hard for a while. I would curl up at the bottom of my bed, becuase it always smelled like him. (I know that's a little pathetic), also I had a funeral service in the backyard with my family. There's still a little memorial piece of black granite (my friend works in flooring) there. I also (this is a little pathetic too) took his collar and hooked it on the belt loop of my jeans for about a week, I got some strange looks, but it really helped. Now it just hangs on a buletin board in my house.

The other thing, is don't blame yourself. My cat died of kidney failure, and I blamed myself for not noticing sooner. The vet said I did all I could, because it progressed very quickly, which is true, but I was still blaming myself. I strongly recommend trying not to do that.

I eventually got a new cat, mostly because my other cat was getting quite a bit lonely, but it took about two months before I was ready.
Good luck.

Answer 2

A pet can be a very important part of a person’s life and it is natural to grieve the loss of such a special friend.

Unfortunately, many people may not understand how one feels about the death of a beloved pet and may not extend the sympathy and support a person needs at this time.
The Pet Grief Support Hotline at the University of Florida College of Veterinary Medicine (Gainesville, Florida 32610) understands how important it is to feel supported during this grieving period.

The loss of a beloved pet can affect you the same as the loss of a close friend or family member. Because your pet was a part of your home life and daily routine, your feeling of loss can be very pronounced. You may go through a grieving and mourning process much the same as if a beloved person had died.

The Pet Grief Support Hotline was started at the University of Florida College of Veterinary Medicine in 1991. The phone line is staffed by volunteers, many of whom are students at the university. Each volunteer receives training in the methods of grief counseling and support.

When you call, your message is recorded. A volunteer will pick up the messages once a day; typically in the evening. If you call after the volunteer has checked for messages, your call will returned the next evening. If you know of others who may benefit from this service, please feel free to give them the phone number.

The telephone number is [phone], Ext. 4080.

The Florida Pet Grief Support Hotline operates 24 hours per day, seven days per week throughout the year. The Hotline operates both nationally and internationally. There is no charge for the service; the Hotline is totally dependent upon donations.

The Hotline is supported by the Florida Animal Health Foundation, the University of Florida Student Government, the Board of College Councils, the University of Florida College of Veterinary Medicine, the World Animal Care Foundation, and private donations.

Answer 3

First, I am so sorry for your loss.. Not too many people understand what it is to lose a pet, especially one that you've had for so long.
There is a wonderful poem that you might want to look up on line, you might find it on www.poetry.com it's called Rainbow Bridge, it's about are special 4 legged critters, and what it is to lose them.
It is a very comforting poem so I do recommend you pull it up.
My roommate has a Lab that is going to be 15 and she simply won't get used to the idea that one day Rumor will not be with her. My advise to her is this.
You are a wonderful pet mother, if you were not your dog would have been gone long ago. Be thankful for so many wonderful years with your pet.
I say the same to you. You were obvisously a wonderful pet mother, and I am certain your kitty was so thankful to have you, as you were to have your kitty.
Everything you are feeling is normal, it is no different than what you would feel had you lost a child.. for some people their pets are indeed their kids.
Again I am sorry for your loss, and I will lift you up in prayer, than you will find the comfort you need to make it through this.
God Bless

Answer 4

First, i would like to offer my sympathy. It is very hard to lose a pet that has been a part of our lives. When you are in grief, whether it is for a pet or human, you will go through certain stages:
Denial (this isn't happening)

Anger (why did this happen to me?)

Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)

Depression (I don't care anymore)

Acceptance (I can deal with it)

Please allow yourself all the time you need to go through these 5 stages (and maybe even repeat some of the stages a few times).

Answer 5

I had to put one of my horses down last fall, and that was awful. First, try not to let that doubt creep in as to whether you did the right thing. You did. Second, pay tribute to your pet to making his/her burial site nice. Get a nice little sculpture or headstone, and plant some flowers in memorium. You may also try to seek out live chat pet forums online so you know you're not the only person to feel this way after a pet passes on. All best to you. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

Answer 6

Everyones grieving is different. The best way for me was to get another cat. I still to this day miss my cat that I had to put to sleep and it's been 4 yrs. But having my new cat which I got a week after I put Mickey down helps. I see some characteristics in Nugget my new cat that I seen in Mickey, and It makes me think of the good times I had with Mickey, and the new good times with Nugget

Answer 7

I raised Boston Terriers for 10 years and when my exwife and I separated she took off and left me with 7 out of 12 to raise alone. Every one of them was just like a child to me and over the years have gotten sick and had to be put down one by one. The last one hurt me the most of all. He had the sweetest disposition and manner about him. The only thing I can tell you is to take it one day at a time and to feel good about the time you had with your pet. My last one has been gone now for 3 years and I will always miss each and every one of them. Get another cat. I know it's not the same, but it may help you to release some of the emotions that you are finding hard to deal with right now. I know how you feel.

Answer 8

I am so sorry for your loss. I had to put my cat Ash down too, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I'd found her as a stray and took her in. She had another cat that ran around with her and started hanging out around my house after I took in Ash. I loved on him a lot the first few days after Ash was gone, it was so sad, because you could tell he was looking around for her and he was sad that she was gone too. I ended up taking him in shortly afterwards, and it helped me feel a little better about things. My vet gave me this poem. I used it as the centerpiece for a collage of pictures. I hope it helps you too.


Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Answer 9

Have a funeral. You don't have to bury your cat in your back yard, or pay for a burial plot. But, when my cat died, we put up an angel bird feeder in memorial and said our goodbyes...

My mom has two dogs who are buried in cemetaries. It's all personal choice. But a funeral helps with the grieving process, and gives you somewhere to go when you just want to say goodbye.

That angel birdfeeder has been in the backyard for three years, and we fill it up every summer. It's our tribute to a friend lost.

Answer 10

My dog died last summer and I was very close to him. I remembered all of the good times i have had with him and had a little funeral service with my friends.
Friends can also help you get through the grieving process. they can help you reflect on all of the happy times that you have had with you pet.