where do you get your ideas from? i am 17 and i recently started to write songs. i thought it would be tough and it is for me. could anyone gimme some pointers and by the way here is the first song i wrote and i wanted to know if you think its any good -----------------------
these voices in my head
make me feel so alone
all these painful thoughts
that i can tell no one
oh lord please save me
i need to reach the light
oh lord please save me
lift me up from this night
with no love left in me
i no longer feel myself
if i can't break thse chains
soon i know i will fall
oh lord please save me
i need to reach the light
oh lord please save me
lift me up from this night
oh how i want to die
and leave this empty shell
i watch my life slip by
as i slip into the dark
lord my end is here
i feel death oh so near
when these words leave my lips
i know i'll speak no more
2007-02-01 05:22:23 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Music
Decent lyrics, but whats the melody like?? Chords, time sig, etc
2007-02-01 05:27:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not really something you look for or try to do. Good lyrics just come to you. Live life like everyday means everything and you should be able to accumulate enough emotion that you won't be able to contain it. Some of my best songs I've written while heartbroken only to realize later that whatever it was that happened really wasn't a big deal in the scope of things. But what I felt at that moment was most assuredly real, even though it was fleeting. You can tell when someone means what they write because you can feel it and a song is like a personal little moment immortalized and put into a form that everyone can share with you. Despite however much you feel like no one else could ever feel like you felt at that moment, be it happy, or angry, or on the verge of tears, there is someone in the world that will be able to sympathize and appreciate the song for being what it is, a beautiful depiction of of a strong emotion that they have at one point felt.
Your song is pretty good if not a little rhyme-ee. Learning the musician rhyming tecnique would be helpful. You can alternate rhyming patterns and use words that sound the same but aren't exactly . An example would be something like "butter" and "another" or "antidote" and "choke". Those are just examples and probably not the best of that, but you get the point. Overall though I really do like your song because at the moment I can relate.
2007-02-05 06:09:33 · answer #2 · answered by Veladesity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best word I can use to describe those words is pedestrian, and I'm not talking about walking.
If you want see top-shelf stuff by a 17 year old, go and buy Matt Johnson's "Burning Blue Soul", made in 1980, and read the lyrics.
Johnson has since recorded his albums under the name, "The The". This is the sort of depth worth striving for.
----- ----- ----- ----- -----
"Like A Sun Rising Thru My Garden"
The sky is glowing with anticipation,
And casts a shadow across the nation
A dust is rising from the heat of the sun
I'm drinking... for the thirst to come.
But I am, contemplating oneness
Summer's here... but I hardly noticed
There's no reason to be singing
There's no reason to be here at all
Occupation, I don't have one
I'd lie in bed, until the cows come,
I'm snowed up, inside my window,
Buried in sand up to my elbows
But I am, contemplating oneness,
summer's here... but I hardly noticed.
There's no reason to be singing
There's no reason to be here at all
World wars and the fate of nations
The sky is glowing with anticipation
I'm wasting away with worry
And my heart just skipped a beat
But then again...
I felt much calmer
I opened up a can of instant karma
A yoga posture for self awareness
And the devil rides out of your life
.
2007-02-01 07:19:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The way you've given it to us, it's just a poem. A song is the sum of the lyrics, the melody, the instrumentation and the performance. You could perform your poem as a polka and it would sound like a comedy number!
2007-02-08 21:33:07 · answer #4 · answered by Flup 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when I write a song I tend not to infer things like death, killing [myself or others] remember what happened when the Beatles wrote Helter Skelter, people got murdered. songs influence the listener, so be more careful with your words. having said that , you seem to be well on your way to the big time...good luck
2007-02-05 21:53:03 · answer #5 · answered by thesingist 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever you go through something in life that has a deep emotional attachment to you and you can't sleep without getting it down on paper, that's when your real emotions come out and people can relate to it.
You have to experience life and pain in order to get the real feelings out.
2007-02-01 05:28:10 · answer #6 · answered by ♦ Phoenix Rising♦ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried the Samaritans? Great lyrics though, should be in Eurovision, with a jolly little dance number, I can see it now.....
"Looord, my end is neaaar (bing a bong, bing a bong)
Seriously, keep up the good work and CHEER UP, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!
2007-02-07 00:35:40 · answer #7 · answered by Benny Zuko, The All-Knowing cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds a bit religous for me.but good clean fun.i also write trad and modern.ie sit down and work on a song or play it and what comes out is it.but i like yours you must have more . i have lots of unused riffs etc.give me a call.
2007-02-05 23:46:12 · answer #8 · answered by hairy balls s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a song writer but I must say your lyrics are mighty depressive xxxxx
2007-02-01 05:27:21 · answer #9 · answered by starlet108 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my sweet Lord. Who said Ian Curtis was dead?!
2007-02-01 13:20:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋