My now ex hurt me very bad, which ended our relationship. It had alot to do with a one night stand he had before we met. He got her pregnant and she had the child. He knew off the bat, he wanted nothing to do with her becuase he didnt want a child with this girl, he didnt respect her, it was a few hours of fun, which I know is true. But b/c of this he suffered a deep depression, he comes from a good family, well educated and was ashamed. He even wanted to commit suicide. He was 26 at the time. I told him he should seek prof. help, but he only wanted me to be there for him, andI was. I helped him come to terms with it, and he decided to meet his child. Well, he decided to end our relationship, becuase he needed space to figure things out, but he said to hold on to us. But I found out he developed feelings for the mother!! When I confronted him he was very cold and hurtful, like I never meant anything to him. Well, as time went on I knew he was getting to know her, but that all fell
2007-02-01 03:53:32 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
fell apart because she lied to him saying she was raped and molested when she was younger. Her mother dies when she was young. I feel seh manipualted him with the child and all her BS stories to keep him around. Now, we tried to talk but he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. I was the one that was always there, and I know he knows this. WE truly loved one another at that time. And said we would always remain friends. But now, he stopped completely with me. I forgave him but I never gave him a moment to think about it all, I persisted alot. I will admit. I knew this girl would do this to him, but he made the choices in the end. Do you think he regrets it?? He wont talk to me anymore:(( So much for remaining friends, like we had always said. I feel hurt about it all, butI can see his situation as well.:(
2007-02-01 03:54:37 · update #1
YOu sound like a sweet person - mwah! No, no matter what happens, you don't reject someone who loves you. That he has done this is a terrible injury to you and as sickening as it is, you need to realize he is capable of doing this. And he HAS done it. He can't undo it, and neither can you.
I think you are well advised to move on and never look back. I know that's easy to say - sorry for your pain.
But no, that is NOT normal and you do NOT have to put up with that to have love.
2007-02-01 08:02:50 · answer #1 · answered by All hat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry this happened to you! But you really need to keep in mind that this information was not a surprise. You knew about this when you got involved with him. Now, since that choice was made, it's time to pull yourself out of the mud and start taking baby steps. Life is not about the destination, it's about the journey! You took a journey with this man and it was nice! You shared a moment of your lives together that he nor anyone else can take from you. Cherish your moments together, and don't be so greedy about wanting more. That is something that TIME will show you when your ready. He will come back to you. Just step back and look at the situation as it was. Learn and grow from it and take this time to rediscover what a beautiful person YOU are! Then, when he does return, you'll be a better, stronger, more aware person in your next journey together. Or someone else will come along and you will be prepared for that journey. Don't dwell on the past, learn from it, feel your pain, allow yourself that time to heal. Then one morning you'll wake up feeling ready to take your first baby step. You were good to him. Now be good to yourself.
2007-02-01 12:10:55 · answer #2 · answered by frigidx 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's ready to move on and be a father to his child. Obviously he has a sense of morality. He was depressed and suicidal over the thought that he created a life he wasn't a part of.
You need to let him go. He's made it clear that he wants the family he created. I hope it works for the sake of the child.
Get out, make new friends and try to quit obsessing over this. He's made his choice.
2007-02-01 11:59:40 · answer #3 · answered by katydid 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have said that you are ready to move on, you are mistaken. You need help getting your life looking forward not back to what happened or what might of been. Seek help, you are an injured party. A band aid now will keep this from getting out of hand.
2007-02-01 12:07:34 · answer #4 · answered by whatevit 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well F**K him..
If he wants to be with trailer trash then fine. Do yourself a favor and forget that you even had this guy. It sounds like you want a pat on the back or a high 5 for being there for him. Well you don't get thanks for being genuinely nice and caring. Quit giving a S**T......I don't know find someone better there are tons of guys that don't have kids and messed up X's or one night stands. I don't understand the need for the raped and molested victims to tell their story to everyone who comes into their life. Yeah tragic, but gross......I wouldn't want to be with a girl that got molested for 6 years of her life by her uncle......Come on...Find someone better and let him have that old used up thing.........
Good Luck.
2007-02-01 12:09:50 · answer #5 · answered by trey6z 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hey girl men are always liars don't be surprised and about the girl well alot of girls are bitches like that just take care and try to find you're self a man who actually respects u and loves you don't try to talk to him if he does blow him off then hell notice what he lost by leaving you
2007-02-01 12:03:14 · answer #6 · answered by moniquita 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i would say move on. he just needed a friend to help him heel and you was the friend. you was the victim. just try your best not to think about it and know that there is someone out there for you. just move on. that's all you can do.
2007-02-01 12:03:59 · answer #7 · answered by tonib1989 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋