how can i get out of pay child support if i give up my parental rights can the courts throw me in the slammer

Question

theier two children in question one i have an the other my ex has i didnt want child support from her but she's so mean that in return i gave her the house and got an apt. and gave her the car and bank savings i m just dont believe in being mean but her however has been so mean to me selling the house and up and moved leaving our son without contact with her and his brother and get this she filed for me to pay child support....i refused not to be ugly to my child at all....it her way of controling me all over again...both children have trust funds set up for the future and life ins. she cashed mines and my sons in thats with her.....i cant even efford a lawery so the advice i get seems to be double standard from public defenders....telling me just dont pay child support and the judge will automatically drop your parental rights.....that didnt happen instead the court went after my licens and taxes now were taking public transportation and i dont kn ow what to do ...! help

dze what do you mean declined by my ex do you mean she can say i dont wantn him to give up his rights

is giving up my parental rights a criminal charge in which the courts can haul me off the jail for or put it on my clean record or will it put my son who is with me in danger if im in court and hes at daycare and they maybe lock me up for saying im giving up my parental rights with no payments!

yah he the pdefender did tell me that he knew i didnt know any better and he told me outside the courtroom verbal not on paper and told me not to worry about it just dont pay it they'll terminate your rights and as a matter of fact i do have a court paper not from him but from the court that reads on the last page that i was ordered to pay and if i didnt my parental rights will be terminated thats what brought me into the conversation with my pdefender about that part at all and come to think about it now he seemed like he just wanted hurry up and go where ever he was about to drive to anyway! this is the truth

in macon,georgia

Answer 1

every state is different (slightly) about the guidelines; so check the links below. just click on your state and find the section you need.

also, just because one child is with one parent, and one with the other does not mean child support will not be ordered. the childs needs, daycare and incomes of both are considered.

for instance, if one parent makes a lot more money then the other, they may be ordered to pay child support or daycare costs.

its not a double standard, you are entitled to legal aid....
if you need legal help, contact your local Legal Aid Office (or what ever they call it in your state). they are in every state and most counties. they go on a sliding scale, so its free to most. they can at least tell you what to do and how to fill out the paper work you need for court. look in the phone book, call the county court clerks office, or your states Bar Assoc for the number.

if they took your tax refund, you must have owed a large amount of arrears; its what they do today because of the years of deadbeats who didnt pay (caused the government to pass stronger laws. the states and federal government are tired of people not paying for their kids).

in any case, get some advice and get it straitened out. any monies that are wrong will be adjusted, so stay strong. the last few links are to help you.

http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/calculators.htm

http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/states.htm
http://www.divorcehq.com/spprtgroups.html

http://www.divorceinfo.com/statebystate.htm
http://www.divorcenet.com/states
http://www.divorcesource.com/
http://www.divorcecentral.com/
http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/calculators.htm
http://www.helpyourselfdivorce.com/child-support-calculators.html
http://family.findlaw.com/
http://www.divorcehq.com/deadbeat.html
http://www.divorceinfo.com/
http://www.divorceinanutshell.com/
http://www.lawchek.com/Library1/_books/domestic/qanda/childsupp.htm
http://family.findlaw.com/child-support/support-laws/state-child-/
http://www.supportguidelines.com/resources.html
http://www.supportguidelines.com/articles/news.html
http://family.findlaw.com/child-support/support-basics/

http://www.ncsea.org/
http://www.nfja.org/index.shtml

FACTS AND REGIONAL FEDERAL CS OFFICE INFO
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/opa/fact_sheets/cse_factsheet.html
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/newhire/fop/passport.htm
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/newhire/fop/fop.htm
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cse/newhire/faq/faq.htm
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/oro/regions/acf_regions.html
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/programs/cse/extinf.html
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/programs/cse/
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/grants/grants_cse.html
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/index.html
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/region2/index.html
http://www.govbenefits.gov/govbenefits_en.portal
http://www.fedstats.gov/qf/
http://www.fedworld.gov/gov-links.html

http://www.mowaa.org/
http://modestneeds.org/
http://freecycle.org/
http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn.nsf
http://www.redcross.org/where/chapts.asp

Answer 2

If a public defender REALLY told you that I would go to the Judge, but you better have PROOF that they told you that. I don't think you do. No public defender in his/her right mind would tell you that and if they did they wouldn't document telling you that. See that advice would get them in alot of trouble. Anyway boy have you screwed up. You shouldn't have given her anything except through a court of law. It isn't being mean, it is just keeping it straight and documented. From what you said there is no proof that you gave her the house. Come on it could have been her's by how you say it. Same thing with the car. Really though you pay what the Court tells you or you go to jail. That is how a Court of Law works. You don't lose the parential rights. You can sign off of them BUT you still have to pay Child Support. That child doesn't cease to exist because you won't admit you are the father. It still needs supported.

Answer 3

Play the game back at her. Sue her for child support for the child that you have. Im sure she hasnt been paying it.

If you cant prove you gave her the house then neither can she. Sue her for your share of the proceeds of the sale of the house and also for half of the car. If she cant prove you gave it to her then you get half the money and can then easily make the child support payments. If she proves you gave her the house and car then you are no worse off and she has proven to the courts how generous you have been and just how greedy she is.

She sounds like a vampire and will suck you dry of everything (including your soul) you have.

Same game different arena -- my ex- tried to sue me for the income from a border I had in the house while the house was being sold (she believed she was entitled to half the money as it was earned by a possession of hers). I counter sued her for her half of the mortgage payments she had not been paying. She soon dropped her suit. So did I -- Im not vindictive but wont be pushed around either.

Dont defend yourself; attack her through the courts.

.

Answer 4

I almost feel guilty for responding to this sense there are a lot of dead beat dads out there; but your story sounds like a few others I've heard.

Try to catch up on payments long enough to get your license back; then move to another state with lax follow thru.. I think virginia and/or tenessee are possibilities.

But what you should probably do is to take her back to court. But be clear in your mind that your perception of events is rational. Judges tend to side with the mother out of tradition, etc without factual, demonstratable evidence.

You might also post a more specific question as to wether there are legal organizations that provide free or cheap help. At the very least lawyers should give free legal advice as to the potential of your case. If they don't, go to different lawyers.

You might even look into forming such an organization yourself. As long as this issue is going to consume so much of your life, it would certainly be more enjoyable and constructive to turn it into a cause.

Answer 5

Somewhat like yourself....during my own divorce....I gave alot up for the "ex."

But, enough of that...lets address your issue.

It takes a lot more than not paying child support to "drop parental rights." The hard lesson that COULD be learned here is that if a judge DOES order child support and you don't pay....then YOU can be found in contempt.

Not having the funds to hire an attorney, your next best option would be contacting legal aid within your community or state and get their help.

Hope this does help you and...

Best wishes!

Answer 6

I could give you a lot of advice (I'm a paralegal). Or I could share the horrors my brother has been through. He, too was married to a daughter of Satan. But you've already gotten some good advice about the system and legalities. There is one thing I want to share with you.

Please do whatever you have to do to fight losing your parental rights. I'm also a foster mother. The pain and anguish children in this dilemma suffer follows them every minute of every day of the rest of their lives. No child should ever have to experience the ultimate rejection - a child by his Dad. You, too will live to regret your decisions / indecisions.

There are many websites devoted to fathers' rights. Possibly a sympathetic pastor would help. Believe it or not, children's welfare services do not like to see this situation either. If you play your cards right, they could become an ally.

Do anything, do everything. Keep records of all visits and phone calls, dates, who you spoke with, etc. Should the worst happen, you will always be able to show your children that you tried to move heaven and earth to keep them. Good Luck and God Bless...

Answer 7

I'm sorry that you and your ex can't be more civil to each other in regards to finances and your children.... coming from someone on the other end of her situation. Divorce is so ugly..... My ex not only did'nt pay child support( our daughter now 25 solely raised by me); but managed to avoid a court order to do so and after filing with d a's office managed to convince them that he could only pay $5.00 mo. and they had the ordasity to accept that.. however, when I protested with order in hand , he was required to pay... He avoided and a couple months later the idiots refunded him a check for the amount, thinking he overpaid! He never sent a dime and was bragging about it.......
Of course, he still wanted all the rights and privilages to exercise his parental visitations
when he actually ever showed up for them. I had no choice but to stop him from hurting her from the feeling of abandonment and refused to allow visitation until he got his act together... Never happened, he regrets it now. He has 3 little ones now and divorced again, does everything he can to provide for them and continues to make up for what he put his first one through....Let me explain one very important detail to you that seem to be missing...... Your babies didnt ask to be born. Both of you created them and now you must do what is right for their sakes regardless of what she does. Her karma will catch up with her soon enough. Count on it!! Your babies need a father in their lives! How else are they going to learn to become good parents like you If you dont make sure of it? As for the financial parts of this mess.... If you just go down to the court office and get some info on free legal aid to file petitions yourself with proof of your finances, so the judge does'nt think you're hiding anything, as well as documontation of your gracious contributions concerning the house and what was done to their trust funds, ( a little bit of research goes a long way to obtain those docs) and find out if she has income to help pay, they will work with you. You can request a mediator to foresee that she too, must provide all her bank statements, pay stubs, income tax returns and assets to defend her allegations of hardship without total support from you and as your(or her financial situation gets better, then they can adjust payments accordingly. If you just show the court some initative on your part, that will go a long way with any judge. There's no need to go to jail or give up your kids
just because you don't know how to go about it. The investment in money and time is well worth it. Your way is soooo not the right answer to handle this.... Those kids love you unconditionally, regardless of your fiancial situation. Please don't fail them. They need you...If you run into a snare and can't figure something out, just email me and I'll try to help you out in your research. Don't let your ex push you around. The law works both ways, once you get alittle bit of a legal crash course. The more you ask, the more you learn. Just like anything.. I hope that this helps. tasbella @ yahoo.com

Answer 8

If she filed for child support, you can show proof you are unable to pay. If you give your rights, and once a verdict has been carried out, you can never change it. Same with her, if she agrees to this she can never ask for child support. I would suggest, paying one dollar a year child support, this way you can have the hold taken off your license, and you still have rights to see your kids. Don't give up your rights, its not a one time decision, this goes for life, until the kids are eighteen. Present your case, show all that she has taken, and show proof you are unable to pay. Take copies of your pay checks, tell the judge you are unable to pay, not that you don't want to pay.

Answer 9

Go to court, explain this to the judge. Show that you each got a kid and if she wants to be a real ahole, demand sole custody of both kids and make her pay for child support. By not going to court you lose everytime.

Answer 10

The statement must be made that no support is expected in the decree when giving up parental rights and the court must sign off on it to make it final