What would you do if your in-laws said that they didn't support your marriage and never called or emailed to see how you were doing? What if your hubby talks to his parents, but behind your back so you never know what he tells them about you?
2007-02-01 02:53:18 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your husband is acting like a child. He needs to support you. If his parents refuse to deal with your existance, then he can't talk to them behind your back. You and he are on a team now. Not your husband and his parents against you. His parents need to SEE that you are a team so that they will be more apt to accept you into the family. Your husband is not helping anything. He needs to communicate to them that he is an adult, he chose a wife, and like it or not, they need to accept it or they won't be speaking to him anymore either.
2007-02-01 03:04:45 · answer #1 · answered by Katie L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't mean to be hurtful but I get the idea that you are very high matanience. If his parents don't like you there has to be something between you and them. Your husband has every right to call his parents, he is their son. He does it behind your back because I'm sure you throw a fit when he wants to call or when you find out he already did. If you are a good wife what are you afraid he is saying to them? Start concentraiting on being the best wife/person you can be and stop worrying what his conversations are about. Your life will be better for the effort.
2007-02-01 11:05:57 · answer #2 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband has the right idea, he has a relationship with his parents and married who he wanted. You should not feel that he is talking about you because he speaks with his parents when you are not around. If they did not support his choice in a wife then I would find it hard to believe that he would listen or bad mouth you. He is looking to avoid problems. Your best bet is enjoy your life with your hubby be happy and in the end they will feel stupid they did not support you.
2007-02-01 11:33:22 · answer #3 · answered by Kat G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hang in there. i had the same issues. We have been married16 years now. It only took my husband about 13 to realize how his mom really treats me. We don't have much to do with them. He talks to her on occassion. He finally quit telling her all our business and so now she doesn't really want to talk to us, because we won't let her be a busy body. My 13 year old daughter sees her a couple times a week, but is not allowed to talk about our business with her. We are cordial with each but she talks behind my back really bad. It is her loss. I am very close with my family and they all love my husband. My father passed away in December (he lived right across the street from us). My husband is just beside himself. They got along really great. Be a good wife, do your best to be cordial and act like it really doesn't bother you that your inlaws don't talk to you. Make your husband happy and he will eventually know who loves him the most.
2007-02-01 11:18:20 · answer #4 · answered by mbmiller2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mrs. B - oohhh, that's a doosey!! I would talk with you man about that. Get him at a time that is good for both of you. Prepare first what it is you want to talk about and what your expectations are. Let him know how you feel. Then see what he says. If he loves you he will listen - what you are feeling isn't unreasonable. If he agrees with what you said - then BOTH of you confront his parents - the same way - a good time and prepare what you want to say - although he should do most of the talking. If he doesn't want to listen or reason with you - take your problem to someone who isn't biased to the situation - like a pastor, or someone. If he isn't willing to do that - something is wrong with that man!!!
2007-02-01 11:02:34 · answer #5 · answered by Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If every thing is good with you and your husband i won't worry about what he is telling them,maybe he does it behind your back because u get angry if u knew.Keep him happy and eventually his parents will accept u when they see how happy u are making their son,occasionally u should send them an email,like for mothers' day and fathers day etc,show them u are part of their family and u cares.
2007-02-01 11:16:57 · answer #6 · answered by pacific30 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Count it a blessing less problems and drama in your life!!!!! I doubt if your husband would bad mouth you to his parents! I believe he talks to them behind your back to keep peace because he knows how they feel about the marriage. So just ignore ignorance and enjoy your husband because he's the one you married :). Just be your sweet self and if they choose to come around treat them like gold if not it's their loss !
2007-02-01 11:15:19 · answer #7 · answered by Cookie48 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have this same problem with mine and it hurts doesn't it? You have 2 choices....the first is to do what he's doing and let him know how bad it feels. The second is probably realize he's still immature and has some apron strings still attached. Either he'll grow out of it or no woman will want to be married to his family all the time as well....including you
2007-02-01 11:00:41 · answer #8 · answered by survivor 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband needs to talk with his parents with you around or this is not right and very disrespectful to you.... What is he hiding and saying about you to them???? Tell him how this bothers you and makes you feel and ask him to please stop. Why do they not support you... You can email them and say hi and ask them how they are doing... Be kind to them and email them pics and stuff and see if this changes anything. Go to http://www.drphil.com and email him about this and see what he has to say.
2007-02-01 11:10:32 · answer #9 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I got married, 13 years ago, My in-laws didn't think I would amount to anything and tried to convince my wife not to marry me. They have since changed their minds....
It will pass when they see he really loves and respects you.
2007-02-01 11:11:16 · answer #10 · answered by DAD_to_3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋