Hide a pregnancy?

Question

I am 30 and engaged to get married. My family & Friends are super religious. I am pretty sure I am pregnant. I am so scared to tell my family & Friends. I am due, 2 months after we are married, so I have to come clean and tell them. I don't want my employeer to know I am pregnant, because I will have to face the shame and scorn of being a christain, who is not married and pregnant.. How do I hide a pregnancy? How long can I hide it?

I am scared.. What should I do??

Answer 1

I know you are scared. Please know there are people out there for you. If your parents and friends abide by the Christian principles of life, they will be understanding and forgiving. Remember, Mary wasn't married before she became pregnant. (Yes, I know that's a little different case ...) But, it's the same principle. I don't know if you should try to hide it. Isn't that lying? You won't be able to share all the wonderful parts of your pregnancy with your friends and family. Plus, the stress of "hiding" your pregnancy may not be good for the baby. It's going to be hard, but with your fiance at your side, I'd sit down with your parents and explain that you know they may be disappointed, but that you love each other and have become pregnant and that you want your family involved in the baby's life. It may go better than you think. If you need more help, I'd call your doctor's office for some advice or call the county's health and human services department so they can get you in touch with a counselor. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 2

I was 23 unmarried and pregnant. I was able to hide it for 5 months from my family and now realize I shouldnt have. You need to cherish this time and enjoy it. If everyone else has a problem with it, tell them where they can go. Also, you are marrying the father and 30 yo, are you supposed to be a virgin? I got married at 8 months pregnant and I have to say I had such a good time at my wedding. God is sending you this baby now, for a reason! He did the same for us and I can now see that he did it because had he not my father-in-law would have never met her. Look at this like a Christian should, its a blessing and if anyone has a problem, tell them you did the right thing for you by having the baby and not an abortion like the church teaches (not that there is anything wrong with abortion). Good luck and email me if you need anything! Oh and CONGRATULATIONS!

Answer 3

I would think it all depends on your size. If your larger you can probably get away with hiding it all the way through. If not I doubt you can hide for much longer. Between 6-7 months you can really pop. I was 6 months preg when I got married and even in my long flowing dress you could still tell i was pregnant.

I do have a friend though whos GF had a baby without him knowing it until she went into labor. She hid it very well considering he saw her every single day...the only thing is...shes not a small girl...so it was easier for her to hide it.

Answer 4

There are many shirts out there.. you can use the baby-doll style shirts.. they are tight under breast and flare out at the bottom. Target had some really cute ones yesterday. Sweat shirts work well too.. but the weather is warming up. But to be honest you will be about 30wks when you are graduating and it will be impossible to hide it. But if you are wanting to hide it til about March.. these shirts may help. I would try talking to the school counselor and let her know that you would like to finish out your semester and graduate without a problem and let her know how long you and your BF have been together and are planning to marry.. but it was after graduation and unfortunately got pregnant but do not want to let it interfere with your schooling. Let them know that you are very serious about your schooling and would like them to keep that in mind as well. You are 22 and this is your Senior year. I wish you Luck!! Congrats.. and you will make a great mother.. you are already proving that with completing school.

Answer 5

First of all, you need to make sure you're actually pregnant. "Pretty sure" is not sure enough. You need to take a pregnancy test, and if it's positive, you should probably go to the doctor soon to make sure everything is okay.

If you're engaged to this man, you need to tell him for sure. You don't want to start off your life together with a hidden pregnancy. If he's a good man, he will be there for you to support you.

Secondly, I would wait until you're 12 weeks pregnant to tell any family. After then, your chances of miscarriage are greatly reduced.

It's going to be hard to tell them, and they'll probably be upset with you and your fiance, but you can't hide it. You need to tell them.

Sit them down with your fiance, and say "We're going to have a baby". It would be helpful to have an ultrasound picture to show them if you have one by then.

They will probably be very angry at first, but soon the excitement of becoming grandparents and aunts and uncles will take over, and hopefully everything will smooth out.

Your employer does not have to know right away, but I would let him/her know soon. By law, they are not allowed to discriminate against you because you're pregnant, no matter how religious they are.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 6

There is no way you are going to be able to hide the pregnancy until you are married! You might get away with hiding it until 4 or 5 months, but not after that.
Seeing as you are engaged to be married, I doubt that anyone is going to brand you as a scarlet woman!
It's 2007, not 1957!

Answer 7

look, sometimes things happen and we wish they would have happened differently, but they didn't. so, we need to put on our big girl pants and own our actions.

you had sex with your fiancee. big deal. you are an adult and about to be married and with someone that you LOVe and LOVEs you and you will both LOVE the baby. i see nothing wrong with that.

as for your employer, well, they will just have to get over it. so their opinion of you changes a little. maybe it will make them see you more as a human who actually lives a life instead of a pious holier than thou relgious fanatic.

hypocrisy is a tough lesson to learn, so learn it and move on. you have a baby coming that will need all of your wisdom and life lessons to help them grow into a good person. so, don't beat yourself up, just be happy that you have a little miracle growing inside of you.

my husband and i had an unplanned pregnancy. i was terrified at first. i didn't know how to tell people let alone my parents!! YIKES!
i spent 26 years of my life trying to NOT get pregnant, so being pregnant felt wrong and weird.
then, i told my sister and she got all excited for me and happy and said "joey, you are an adult. you are married. it's o.k. for you to be pregnant. it's great! you're going to be a mommy and there's nothing else more special than that." then, i realized that she was right and everyone was VERY happy for us.

as for my boss...i was nervous to tell him, but when i did i realized that i shouldn't have been nervous b/c women have babies all the time. it's no big deal and it's better to plan than to spring it on them at the last minute.

i hope this helps.

take care.

Answer 8

The One whose opinion matters is God. Make sure you are right with God first. Then tell your family soon, they will find out eventually anyway...the longer you wait the more their feelings will be hurt. They may surprise you and be very supportive. As for work, try wearing loose fitting clothes and stick to skirts instead of pants. If this is your first, you can probably hide it for a good 4-5 months. Good luck.

Answer 9

This is one thing you cannot hide for long. you will start to show by max. 5th month adn it bound to come out in the open. So why wait in fear and suffer from anxiety which is not desirable in a pregnancy. Start by telling your family and have your fiancee there to help you out. They will not scold you roughly during his presence. Or try move the wedding forward a little.

Answer 10

Take a test and be sure before you worry yourself to death.

If you are, I don't think you'll be able to hide it much more than after the 1st trimester.

Better to just let everyone know earlier, they'll figure it out anyway and you'll have to deal with what everyone thinks anyway.

You could always move the wedding up.