2007-01-31 22:45:55 · 24 answers · asked by micheal killjoy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The guy's wife may already know. You'd be surprised how many women forgive cheaters and take them back or that deliberately turn a blind eye when he's cheating.
But that's just a vindictive thing to do to try to hurt him back. You should be concentrating on what you're going to do with your marriage. Are you going to divorce her? Try to work things out and stay in the marriage? Go to counseling.
Focus the constructive, rebuilding your own life, instead of doing the destructive and trying to ruin someone else's.
2007-01-31 22:57:56 · answer #1 · answered by Plumeria Passion 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell his wife today. I'd also go see an attorney and get ready to file for divorce. When 2 people have been together for this long and one decides to cheat this late in the game, it's highly probable that she's been doing it for years and you've just found out about it.
My first wife was cheating the day after our wedding, and was doing it for 8 years before i caught her. I divorced her so fast it made her head spin, and after the divorce her 3 sisters came to me and apologized for not having told me about her numerous affairs. That was 17 years ago, she's been married 11 times since i divorced her.
I don't know why i was so blind and couldn't see what was happening. I wasted so many years with that woman.
2007-01-31 23:18:34 · answer #2 · answered by michael_trussell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did she cheat? the first thing you need to do is find out why it happened? There had to be a problem somewhere for her to have turned to another man, As you all were married 28 years I would believe that the affair isn't a sex thing, older people who engage in affairs are usually looking for some one to listen to them, someone to make them feel sexy ( Even with the stretch marks, extra weight) and wanted.
Then when you learn what the problem is the two of you need to see if this can be fixed, Can you forgive her? and let it go, not beat her with it for the rest of your lives together? Is she willing to work out the problems and give up the other man?
And third, Why tell his wife? She is probebly going to be just as hurt and angry as you are. Two wrongs don't make a right.
Keep you problems within your own family. She will find out on her own.
2007-01-31 23:08:36 · answer #3 · answered by kathy h 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the first thing u should do is to find out where her heart is at, and if she wants to be with u or with him. telling the mans wife will only cause his marriage to end,and maybe yours at the same time. obviously u want your wife back, telling her may only bring problems to your marriage, it won't stop the cheating, as if his wife leaves him, u know where he will be going, to your wife. so talk to her, see if there's any remorse on her part, before u make any moves. give her the chance to repent first before any drastic measures. if u love her and want her back it can't be done through revenge and hurting someone else. people do cheat, it seems to be a part of life anymore, sad to say but very true. find out what she is feeling, and go from there.
2007-02-01 00:45:54 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortuantely the problem lies with your wife...not the guy. Although this guys is a jerk who obviously has no respect for the institution of marriage, if your wife wasn't looking, there wouldn't be a problem. You need to talk to you wife not him as hard as that is. I am going through the same thing right now and even though I want to beat this guys face in...I know its my wifes fault. Maybe find out what is making her unhappy or leave her.
2007-02-01 04:58:30 · answer #5 · answered by fedup 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do as I did, my partner was two timing me with a guy for 3 years. As they met at his place and I knew about it about 4 weeks after it started, I had a ball filming and photographing them then a month before it ended and I had 5000 photos and hours of video, I posted it on every site I could. I sent the links to their boss, their workmates, their family, friends, everyone I could think of including his wife and her family.
2007-01-31 23:12:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you although I have not been in this situation personally. But first your wife has done a BIG mistake and to make the mistake even bigger is to tell people that she has done that mistake.
It should be private, although its severe, you should now address why it happened?? There must be a reason.
Can the mistake be fixed?? Not totally because you are obviously devastated.
2007-01-31 22:53:05 · answer #7 · answered by Purple 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After 28 years, if your wife cheats you, divorce her.
2007-01-31 23:10:32 · answer #8 · answered by Ilovetheworld 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look man after so many years one loved you then got married if she want keep marriage happy she wouldnt do that, i guess shes not interested on you anymore and if she cares about ur feelings she would stop without any action from u, understand if i was you just leave ur wife or esle she can stop without you telling advice
2007-01-31 23:17:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you proved yourself that your wife is cheating you it's time for you to decide to end up your marriage...28 years of marriage is nothing if one is cheating..you will never have peace of mind as long as you're together..but if you really love your wife and still want to save your marriage confront her about her infidelity and if she ask forgiveness and promise not to cheat you again well,follow your heart...if you want to save your marriage never tell anybody about your wife's cheating.
2007-01-31 23:00:40 · answer #10 · answered by marje 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋