Could u kindly throw some light on this?
Cause, this man, I am with and whom I have been broken up with twice - once cause of some other girl
2nd cause he could not accept me when I told him about my past., and in this case, We did not speak for 2 years, and he never really wished me on my birthdays, however, when he was in town he did try and make sure he bumps into me to clear stuff up, but I was busy dodging him...
Anyhow 2 yrs later, he's back in my life, and for the enth time, we confessed our love to each other.....
However, everyone is telling me that I can do better, and everyone is telling me to move on.
I am feeling almost stuck in this situation, And I know he makes me feel good at times, but some things of him annoy me, and he can bore me at times, but I still love this guy......
And now, I can’t understand myself, and I hardly know why.......
Also, I am kind of scared that he will do the same thing again, and another fear of mine is that, when I need him
2007-01-31 22:15:29 · 11 answers · asked by Franky 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
And now, I can’t understand myself, and I hardly know why.......
Also, I am kind of scared that he will do the same thing again, and another fear of mine is that, when I need him the next time I can’t really bank on the fact if he will actually be there.
Please help…………. Advice Appreciated and needed.
2007-01-31 22:16:07 · update #1
Unfortunatley you are not alone. A ton of girls fall in to this trap at some point or another in their lives. The fact that he "cannot accept your past" and that he "cheated on you", should be enough of a slap in the face to knock some sense in to you. the reality of this situation, is that "he is just not that in to you".........You already know it, but you strive to obtain a "challenge", which most people do (want what they cannot truly have). He is manipulating you, even though you cannot see it clearly. You said he "hurt" you..........What kind of love it is that? Don't you want someone who will always be by your side, support you and BE YOUR BIGGEST FAN????? Gain some confidence in yourself, tell yourself that you deserve better, and move on, you are wasting precious time in your life, and the stress and worry of the situation is not good for you or anyone around you. Your friends are seeing the picture clearly, and you are choosing to walk through the fog, even though you truly know deep down inside that this is not a good fit? Don't you deserve better???? Ask yourself that!!!
2007-01-31 22:27:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey, well you've been with that guy for quite a while and when you where with him,he made you feel wonderful and special.Now that his gone,you miss those special times and the wonderful things you did together.If you really want get over him,its going to take some time(maybe a long time).But be patient and it start fading away and you'll find a better fish in the pond:)
2007-02-01 06:23:41 · answer #2 · answered by Yves 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If practically thought, you HAVE TO go ahead and not look at your back, but only to make it a review mirror where you see your fault or mistakes and take your further steps with intense cares. But love is not practical, it is spiritual, and you feel highly attracted to him, which prevents you to get away from him. Then I would suggest: don’t be in doubts as what to do, that will create you even more problems as you can’t understand yourself well.
Leave everything aside, what went in the past and what may come in the future. At the moment think what do you want! Want to leave him here and go ahead yourself? Or want to go with him? Once you chose your wish, make it your decision and go with that.
If you choose to go with him, keep everything he did to you in the past, in your mind, as a review mirror for your future decisions. And do be pessimist about his reactions in the future. However, continue your relation with a new beginning and forget about the past upsets and disappointments, but don’t leave expecting the worse form him. Unexpected events really hurt. And always keep in mind, if you got hurt for the third time from him, that will add to your strength and make you bold about your future decisions; but until unless you are ready about something, you will regret in the future. This will avoid regression.
And if you chose to go ahead without him, then just forget about him totally, by keeping yourself busy in every way that will avoid his thoughts disturbing you. Make it your decision that you deserve better, which he wasn’t worth it.
2007-02-01 07:11:28 · answer #3 · answered by Alkahest 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Open the doors of your mind - see the unlimited beauty of the lord - explore your inner treasures - realise that your life is not to waste on some body who has no guarantee for a second also for their life or moods
You are the star of the supreme - awake awake awake - leave away the petty stones and play with the imperishable jewels of values -
Just fall in love with the lord and you will see a real yourself - you are very special, you are valuable, you have unlimited power of goodness which is coming out in the form of weakness of 'attachment' - Just empower yourself, your life is not just for one non-guaranteed individual -
Rise high, see a new you
2007-02-01 08:15:42 · answer #4 · answered by Angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you just love this guy too much...
stop it...
you said yourself that this guy never accepted your past...
you said that the man left you for a girl...
you said that he annoys you... bores you... he makes you feel scared...
IF you think you can still stay with that for another 5 more years or 10 more years... love him...
IF you cannot move on...
you deserve something more than that...
you are a wonderful being...
you need to have you own life...
take what you think is to be yours... your freedom...
have fun thinking about it...
2007-02-01 08:41:31 · answer #5 · answered by DEADPOOL 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
See xbfs r like dandruff,kips coming back.If you really feel for him from ur heart then thr must b smthng special abt him.U knw wat there is amachine in our own self which helps us to feel & understand things in life thats Heart...wat i will advice to you is talk to ur heart.wat do u feel from inside...do you nid him,do u think he loves you the same as u do?mayb when u kip asking questions to yourself the answers will b right thr & trust me it happens.Apart from all the bad things that he has if u think he loves u 2 then COME ON a woman can change a man's characteristics...u can do it if u really wan to....If u feel he dusnt deserve to b with you,please fight with your head on & get out of it.Idid the same now i m happy with the person i deserve to be with.....Try that.Takecare.
2007-02-01 06:40:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem. The reason you can't move on is because HE WON'T LET YOU! He seems to know how to keep you hooked... just like my ex. He barely talks to you, but every so often he runs into you and tells you how much he cares and then he hurts you again. He knows just how to play his cards so you can'T move on. You have to ditch all contact. Delete his number and email. If he calls don'T answer. If he emails, delete without reading. If you see him, try to not let him see you, but if that is impossible ignore him.
2007-02-01 06:27:10 · answer #7 · answered by かわいい愛朱利 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dump him move on.... why do you need to ask people for what you already know.
I bet your friends family anyone who can bear your tales of woe have been telling you exactly the same thing, you don't need them, you don't need us, just pull your finger out already.
2007-02-01 10:16:49 · answer #8 · answered by Dr Stoopid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could really benifit from a book called 'women who love too much.' search the web for resources using that subject line.
you wont be disapointed.
2007-02-01 06:42:42 · answer #9 · answered by badseed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is one reson which makes a man exploit the womenfolk
probably its ego related where one tries to win the one who rejects one
2007-02-01 06:35:46 · answer #10 · answered by Caring 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋