and she rang and asked me to pick her up half hour later and when i went to get her she had gone down park until it was dark and mates dad said they had asked me and they hadnt.
2007-01-31 20:39:48 · 17 answers · asked by karen t 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, I would, she needs to learn that there are safety issues about being out in the dark, she is still young, maybe she will think twice in the future.
2007-01-31 20:43:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are on the right road grounding her, what I did with mine was although they would be grounded I would initally extend the amount of time I was grounding them for so if I wanted to ground them for three days I would tell them its five,I would by the second evening call them for a chat and without arguing (hopefully) I would sit down and explain why I had to ground them I would be very honest and tell them that although I don't make them right for lies I would also explain how scared I was as a mum to think that they was somewhere that I did not know explain the whole if the police knock on the door thing and try and make them understand that with the truth comes trust if I have complete trust in them then I can be a bit more linient than the other parents, cause I will always know the truth and anything they wanted to do that I did not accept was because it was at a risk to them and as a parent I have to protect them, if the response I got from the talk was honest and understood I would then say because you have been grown up and honest you can go out tomorrow so they then thought they had got a bonus. I am not saying it worked every time but at first it was a sure thing every time now they are so used to the honesty thing and been open I sometimes wish they did not tell me quite so much but it is nice just really scary especially now they are 16. but try it every option is an option good luck.
2007-01-31 21:31:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't correct this behaviour at an early age they will think it is OK and will carry it into adult life. They will run rings around you if you don't get a grip now. Positive encouragement to tell the truth and trust that by owning up they will be rewarded for honesty not punished. Explain the danger and make clear ground rules. Explain your rules for playing out in the dark to your childs friends parents, after all it's in their interest as well.
2007-01-31 20:51:23 · answer #3 · answered by trello 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not only should you ground her, but you should have a serious talk to explain why you are grounding her so that she understands that this is not a punishment for nothing. In future you also need to be in contact with the other parents to confirm that your daughter will be spending the night, then you know and the other parent appreciates that you are putting your daughter in their hands and visa versa. If your daughter brings a friend to spend the night, make sure the other parent knows.
2007-01-31 21:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by Sbunch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, but don't make the grounding an unreasonable amount of time, you wont be able to keep it up, and then it is seen as weakness. Also explain that all actions have consequences. This grounding is the consequence of lying. The most important thing is to follow through threats of punishment, and I dont mean beat her. Just be firm, and explain that because you love her you must know where she is.
2007-01-31 20:49:20 · answer #5 · answered by ballena 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ground her before she gets out of hand and stick to it. My daughter said she was with her friend when she was 12 but was in a field at night with a boy. She was grounded for a week but wangled her way down to a weekend in the end. She is 24 now and still remembers how cross I was.
2007-01-31 22:17:35 · answer #6 · answered by jaygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right to ground her. Theres too many dodgy people in the world today, and her safety is your main priority. She needs to know the dangers. If you know where she is its not too bad but being in a park when its dark is not a wise thing to do really. Good luck x
2007-01-31 20:44:12 · answer #7 · answered by spensmum 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes, you're right, and don't give in either! Ground her and give her a ton of chores to do !
Also, she's only ten. You are the adult, you make the decisions, you are the boss. She will find that she will grow up and can't keep a job if she can't follow directions. She will also not know how to handle her own children if you don't model good discipline for her.
2007-01-31 20:43:59 · answer #8 · answered by BIGDAWG 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are right to want to bring up an honest child and it won't happen all on its own you need to do it, at least you care, many parents don't care were their kids are as long as they are out of their face
My children have grown up now but at times it was a hell ride be true to them and yourself if the want you to be honest and respect them, they need to do the same and this is how they learn.
2007-01-31 20:48:18 · answer #9 · answered by deb m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
totally right-if she is lying to you now at ten she will continue to lie as she gets older and in this day and age you have to be so careful. ignore her and do what you know is right, don't doubt yourself because she will pick up on it and kids are like wolves, the minute they sense a weakness they will pounce!!! be strong, you are only doing this because you love her and want to keep her safe and even if it takes till she has kids of her own she will eventually appreciate it.
2007-01-31 20:46:31 · answer #10 · answered by louie3 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋