Ladies, how do you explain your past lovers to the person you married?

Question

Especially if your body count is much higher than his.

My wife has only f'ed one other dude besides me but that still makes me feel really crappy. By today's standards that makes her a good girl though.

So what's the point in marrying a high milage lady so you can lock yourself down and deny yourself the pleasures that she already enjoyed?

Say for example the woman has 10 previous lovers, and the lucky dude that marries her only has been with her. Isn't this a little unfair? Chick got to go live it up while dude is now stuck with her for thie rest of his life. And if he decides he wants to up his body count, he'll constantly be threatened by divorce.

So basically, 10 dudes got to hit it and quit it and lucky #11 is paying out the behind for it.

I only included my wife as an example. I do not put my wife down for her past lover. I just said that she is a good girl.

I was just asking about women in general.

To the people that say this is about my wife: you are obviously retarded.

So basically, its ok to F a bunch of dudes before marriage, but after marrige, if your dude tries to do the same thing you have already done, oh crap its the end of the world. Why are people such hypocrites?
Marriage should not forgive a promiscous past so easily.

Answer 1

I love women but I would bet money that most women actually have had more sexual partners than their male counterparts before they get married, in the majority of cases......at least within the last dozen years and counting. I've seen it in happen in just regular relationships, friends, the dating scene, etc. It's just that women generally don't tell. I dated a girl off and on for about 10 months and she had sex with at least 3, maybe 4 other guys aside from me during that time, while she was the only one I was with sexually during that time. I think people need to start acknowledging the truth about this stuff but society doesn't want to or isn't ready yet....I dunno.

Answer 2

Ok

This is such a wierd question I dont know where to start.

Firstly why do you insist on calling it a body count...

Secondly, what does it really matter how may people you have slept with vs the other person. Its called the PAST for a reason and besides if they married you thesy also chose you for a reason.

Jealousy is a dangerous thing, why do you think that because someone has had more than you you have to match or exceed them, is this some kind of power trip?

I have had enough guys to work out what I do and dont want and so has my partner. He has had more girls than me - for one he is older so it makes sense. Also all his past girls have made him into a fantastic lover (which is a bonus for me). we both know what we want in bed and are not afraid to say it.

We chose to be together and are faithful which is the most important thing

What you are saying is that it is ok to be unfaithful if you are just matching your wife/girl/whatever...what school of ethics did you come from you neaderthol bastard...wake up and smell the future and stop living in the past.

What you term unfair is like saying one kid has 10 candy bars and the other only has 2. Its not unfair but it is the way the cookie crubles. The guy should be happy he is getting her experience. You are bing juvenile and uneducated.

Answer 3

Sounds like a whole lots of bag and Bagges on your part.
Why would you even care or want to know anything about before? It's the past. X's are called X's for good reason's.
I'm still Tring to figure out the part why your wife ever married such a narrow minded play boy like your self?

You married her to build a world around your sole mate and not to rehash the past.
You would be better to just stop worrying about who did what and think more along the lines what the wife's going to do if you can't get this out of your brain.

She married you for her today's, tomorrows, rest of her life's sexual partner.
UN like you marring her to bore her to death about your purists life style.
Get a hobby!! And not playing with cut out paper dolls.
You done quite enough of a job down sizing the wife.

Answer 4

Humans are Humans not GOD!!
They make mistakes and learn from them and move on.
Think about it this way if you really love your wife (for example), and you had 2 ladies before her. Do you regret it?? would you really have wanted her to be the one and only?? And vise versa.
I agree sex is a thriller, wouldn't it be nice to have sex with every crush you have while you are married???
But what is more important?? The long term relationship or the short excitement of 15 minutes??
It is not a compitition that if i have sex with 5 guys my husband has to have sex with 5 gals, right?
The past is the past let's live the FUTURE.

I would explain my past lovers to the person I married but no details.

Answer 5

authentic, a woman who's been married and raising a kin for 20 years merely unearths out her husband is a cheater (through fact cheaters are extremely prolific liars, to the two the different female and the spouse) and in one day she will become an entire drama junkie, a glutton for punishment and loves the discomfort! you think of? supply us a harm. Naive, possibly. merely as naive through fact the ingredient beef who believes that she is the affection of this guy's existence and could carry on for expensive existence to the scraps he throws her. Naive through fact she, the spouse, believes her husband of many years while he tells her he loves her and is remorseful? Naive through fact she took vows and believed that her husband who substitute into status there beside her, took the same? Naive, possibly. Betrayed, fairly. not each guy or female will cheat back. now and back while they hit the wall (and generally particular, that could take getting caught) they lose the respect of kin, babies, coworkers and acquaintances. now and back they even lose their jobs. we've seen this ensue many times in the information at present. now and back they don't incredibly "get" it till they're caught and are confronted with the idiocy of their strikes and the discomfort they have brought about. beneficial, many wait slightly and sneak back available searching for some affordable thrills back. They fix errors and get greater sinister, conceal their tracks better and warn their beef to maintain the down-low. now and back. it incredibly is not shrink and dried. you're making judgments on women persons's judgements for the reason which you're sitting there residing vicariously with the aid of a "pal" that needless to say has approximately as lots ethical fiber as a peanut. till you have walked the walk and lived in the path of the devastation and the aftermath from a betrayed substantial different's adventure you at the instant are not likely to comprehend his or her reactions to the placement to any extent further than i will comprehend why a woman might enable herself be some guy's grimy little secret. *****

Answer 6

If she is happy with the fact that she has only been with you and you are confident in that and don't think she would cheat just to see "whats out there" then I wouldn't worry about it. Just because you would feel different if the tables are turned is irrelevant.

If it's really an issue, talk about it... maybe you shouldn't have gotten married in the first place if thats something you can't get over.

Answer 7

I had a LOT of fun in my younger days. I settled down though and married an awesome man. He knows I've had a really good time in my life but he's never asked for details. That's because he knows I honor the vows I made to him before God. He knows that he's the one for me and I make sure he knows it. I've never married anyone else so that, in and of itself, speaks volumes. Neither of us have any desire to discuss details of our past. We just enjoy the love we have with each other today... and that's really all that matters.

Answer 8

wow you are a jerk. does she look down on you for not having sex with more people? id doubt it she loves you for who you are now not who you were then. why wouldnt you do the same thing? you probably could have had sex with more people but you chose not to. she chose to do so. that is the past this is the now, jesus i used to be a jerk but not like that. did you ever once think that perhaps she is not proud of what she did before she met you that maybe just maybe she is ashamed of being with so many guys. but all you can think of is yourself and how you feel. when she leaves you dont get on here asking why.

Answer 9

my husband knows that I was naughty enough when I was still single. So basically he understands that. It's up to the other end on how he reacts to it. In my case I'm just lucky I have an open minded husband who loves me. It's not about the body count, sex is sex but emotional attachmentin sex is different.

Answer 10

I don't think it is necessary to go into gory detail, I have always protected myself and so I know I am clean, that's all that matters to me. I know my b/f has had g/f's before, but that's just life, I accept that, but I don't need to know details, it just tortures the person. It's a bit hypocritical to say that it bothers you that your wife has had one other lover, I am sure you are not snowy white either.