My batchmate who I have not for the last 14 years had lent me emotional support when I needed it most. He is committed to his family as much as I am to mine. I met him once in a resort and we only shared few things about my life. I had been through hell with my husband and and inspite of my parents warnings I have been with him with the hope that he would change.I even introduced my friend to my husband when their family visited us.The letter I wrote may have some emotional outpourings but I did not send it as I sensed I am crossing my line. My parents and my sister feel as if I had done something very grave. My husband who even suggested divorce only few days before he found the letter feels as if I cheated on him. I told him that the letter is only a fantacy and the content is quite different from reality. I always worried about my husband and I even planned to take him and my kids to US along with me once I get there? How can I get over this as the pain in his eyes hurts me much.
2007-01-31 17:55:39 · 9 answers · asked by venus 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You definately have the right to fantasize, but i wouldnt write it down, this will just get you caught. if you are thinking things like this, maybe divorce is the best option.
2007-01-31 18:00:36 · answer #1 · answered by Kimberly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Writing down things in letters that are never intended to be sent are great emotional releases for me. The content of those letters are meant to be private, & if someone finds one of them & reads it, I would consider that an invasion of privacy much the same as if they opened up my diary, or journal & read it.
Your husband violated your trust by invading your privacy, & now he is suffering the consequenses of that violation with his resultant bad feelings. This is something you have no control over. You didn't cause him to snoop, & you didn't cause him to jump to the wrong conclusions either.
You have no responsibility here except that you failed to foresee the possibility that he would come across this letter, & do what he did.
He sounds like a very insecure person to be going around checking up on you, & making accusations. He will need to work on why he's so insecure, & how he can make himself better, but that won't happen unless, & until he see's it for himself. Meanwhile you will have to accept that you have no control over his emotions, or his actions.
Take Care, & don't let him discourage you from dealing with your emotions in your own way, such as writing out your feelings.
2007-02-01 02:13:47 · answer #2 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all i am sorry for what has happen in your turf life for all this years now,See my friend, things do change with time so i would suggest you to be strong and at a moment you do not need to give any confession to your Husband or your families.Why? because is too much confusion in there head it will not help you to try to make them understand your situation,let it go for sometime and be positive with your own self if you think you have not done any wrong which i belief with your explanation.Just keep your head up and let time do the healing hope for the best to happen because the WORST is gone forever now.
Take care and all the best.
2007-02-01 02:13:13 · answer #3 · answered by james l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fantasizing is ok if it's just for fun. But imposing these wierd fantasies into reality is not. You did that. You wrote what was in your mind at that moment. How can you expect your husband to trust you here after.
You gotta ensure your husband taht you love him and would never cheat on him. It would be a hell lot difficult this point onwards, but you gotta do what you gotta do. You will definitely feel good once you are able to win his trust back again. All your pains would vanish... Trust me.
:-)
2007-02-01 16:07:22 · answer #4 · answered by plato's ghost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF you have not noticed yet you husband is asking about this same letter about 10 questions up from yours. Maybe you two should have a talk.
2007-02-01 02:49:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know. that's something that 'he' will have to get over with his own decision if he 'wants' to continue to have a relationship with you. that's the key to forgiving. if a person feels wronged, is wronged but wants the relationship...that person has to make a decision to remain in it and move past it positively. your patience, continued kindness and compassion and extra special treats for your hurting man will help him forget.
peace
2007-02-01 02:02:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you surely have, but not by hurting feelings of others..they all are hurt lady..because they love you alot and didn't expected this from you..don't give up..just give hem some time..
2007-02-01 02:01:09 · answer #7 · answered by ruprekhawati 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just give him some time to become normal... everything will be fine...
2007-02-01 06:28:23 · answer #8 · answered by neha j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yessss
2007-02-01 08:53:04 · answer #9 · answered by Saahil 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋