My 11mo daughter stands in her crib when she starts crying. We are doing the ferber method (I know some ppl will respond disagreeing with my choice to do this... I welcome your dissent, but be aware my mind is 99% certain its the right choice). Should I lay her down when I come in to comfort her, or just rub her back while she stands?
2007-01-31 16:29:36 · 8 answers · asked by Karen H 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Yes, lay her down and comfort her. Reassure her eveything is going to be ok. If you are calm it will help her be calm too. It will take a few times to get used to, but I know you can do it!!! Good Luck!
2007-01-31 16:36:01 · answer #1 · answered by Olivia 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just ignore her and let her cry it out...
I personally think extreme ferberizing is mean. She's a baby for goodness sake! She has the next 90 years to be tough and have her needs ignored. Why do it now when she is obviously crying for a reason.
I didn't ferberize my daughter and she is very happy, hardly cries or has any weird emotional detachment issues or problems. But hey, I guess we'll see who needs more therapy as teenagers right?
2007-01-31 16:37:38 · answer #2 · answered by RitzFitz29 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
lay her down then rub her back. when you leave, she'll probably started crying again. you may have to repeat it a few times. did she just start pulling herself up? she may need a week or so til she figures out how to lay back down by herself. i don't know much about the ferber method, but we would lets ours cry for 5 min then lay her down. next time maybe 10 min, then lay her down. usually it doesn't take too many more times. bu that way at least she knows you're there. good luck.
2007-01-31 16:35:47 · answer #3 · answered by aggielax 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Even Ferber recently retracted forcing your baby to scream alone in her bed as a way to get them to sleep.
Rub her back, nurse her, rock her PARENT her to sleep.
2007-01-31 17:01:19 · answer #4 · answered by Terrible Threes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what does the book say? if you're 99% on it, then do what the book says to do. personally i would go on your instincts. i don't furber by the book, but my year old is allowed to cry it out for awhile only, and then i go in and lay her back down and then rub her stomach or back to soothe her. that's my reccomendation. by the furber method from what i understand you don't go in at all.
2007-01-31 16:33:41 · answer #5 · answered by cagney 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, you can teach her that her efforts to help herself are all in vain. Passivity is a great trait in kids. Plus, the cortisol that floods the brain of a crying baby suppresses learning and sets her up to be an adult who poorly handles stress.
Or, you could let her sleep with you as she evolved to do. And everyone can be happy.
2007-01-31 16:55:32 · answer #6 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Just rub her back... babies love that and it calms them down
2007-01-31 16:33:28 · answer #7 · answered by xomandee3xo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
neither, give her her binky, bottle, blanky, animal, lay her down say good night and walk out! and remember dont smile at her play with her nothing, just lay her down say good night and out you go!
2007-01-31 16:34:28 · answer #8 · answered by angelgrl5200 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋