Why is it so difficult for people to forget their first love ?

Question

Gimme a scientific , biological and rational answer .

Answer 1

Most people don't forget their first anything, especially their first love...........A first is something that will always stay with you.......First time you went to the movies, first job, first best friend, etc........The first time for anything is always the most special simply because it is the first time...........It never happened before so it stays with you..........Can you remember any other firsts in your life???..........Now can you remember seconds or thirds???..........I can't but I sure remember my first almost everything, especially my first love........First is the most special..............CAT

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Answer 2

You could still be energetically connected to your ex, and while that sounds like encouragement from the universe, it's not -- it's you! You still may be giving him/her your energy in thought, emotional, or spiritual form. You could be doing so unconsciously, out of habit, or based on a belief that this love is the only (or the best love) you could ever have. And, quite possibly, you have not allowed yourself to fully grieve it yet.

On the other hand, there is also the possibility that your ex won't let go and is still hooked into you. If this is the case, you can clear that out in a gentle way with love and light (and say goodbye if that's what you wish).

Whatever the case, this may have been the deepest love you have ever shared with someone. But know that it is not the only love (or the best love) that you can -- or will -- share with anyone in the future.

Here is a corrective action:

First of all, you have to know how to communicate with one another! And you both have to have talk about this in the beginning of the relationship! Both partners need to express the things you do and don't like if you expect the other one to remember them.

Second, you have to trust one another. For instance, you must realize that if your partner wants space for a week (or vice versa), it means space! No calling/stopping by/emailing. This is called respecting each other's wishes – it comes with trust. It's not always easy, but if you can do this, it can work out!

Lastly, recognize that nothing is perfect. Try not to say things you'll regret and if you make a mistake, try to correct it before things go too far, or it's too late. Show a commitment to your partner, and take the time to put in your best effort – most of the time, it won't go unnoticed!

MJ
MJ

Answer 3

The mind works in wonderful ways. Our attraction to the opposite sex (for males) usually starts at age 13, and progresses into a irrational slurry of emerging hormones, and pimples, etc. The reason why males recall their first loves so often is because of our instinctive search for a mate, coupled with the very exciting feeling of love, and all of the goodies that accompany it. For example, and most importantly, physical action. We attach a very high importance to our first loves, because usually it is our first sex as well. We are driven by our instinctive need to procreate, and puberty exacerbates that emotion by preparing our bodies to reproduce. Sexuality has been mainstreamed within the last 40 years, and it is not difficult to look anywhere to find sexually suggestive images. The wow factor is partially due to the exposure to that environment.

Fair_gwen gave a great answer with cognitive mapping. There has been extensive research in the field. Check out this article:

http://staff.um.edu.mt/mbor7/mapping.html

Answer 4

There happens to be no "scientific, biological OR rational" answer. It's what we trusted and believed in first. And the first time you fall, you fall hard...be it in anything, but love is the worst. I still hurt over mine and mistakes I made and that was almost 30 years ago. Everyone thought we were perfect together. Turns out, I'm living in no man's land working hard to make ends meet after another disastrous affair...and HE (my first love) became one of the premier owner's of a Southern CA. GPS company. Lives in a rich part of southern CA and I should have been there with him. I know that our problems were my mistakes and I live with it everyday. But, aside from the "outcome"...I have always missed him terribly. I know I didn't answer your question, but I did have some input to give on my account. Good Luck and hope you can forget yours..if possible.

Answer 5

First romantic loves are the most special of all. It's how you feel with that other person-a chemistry that comes over you. You trusted another with your feelings for the first time. Once a person gets into your heart, there's no way out. You may move on to to other relationships-yet that Love you'll carry with you-always. If you're still thinking of it - reach out - life is very short.

Answer 6

It is because "animal" can never forget the time when it became a "human".

Also, first love entails the properties of 2 mutually coupled (ideal in first love) coils wherein the current following in either causes induced emf (emotion) in the other. This way these also develop magnetic poles North (N) and South (S) poles due to currents.

Thus when N (first coil) retreats (goes away) the other coil presents S to attract. When N advances, other coil offers N to repel (no more closer than the closest). AND the first love reverberates in eternity.

Answer 7

It is difficult for people to forget their 'first' anything. It is the thing we measure all other similar things against.

If it was a first anything, that also implies there is at least a second of that thing, which means there is an opportunity to idealize the 'lost' love as flawless. This is only a product of no longer being intimate with this 'first' thing and therefore not being familiar with it's tragic flaws.

Answer 8

Cognitive mapping. Every time something new is experienced, a vague definition is mapped in your mind. For example, the first time you saw a cat, you mapped it to things that already existed-- pets, animals, fluffy, tails. You also noted 4 legs, 2 ears, etc. If the first cat you ever saw only had 3 legs, every time you see a cat you'd remember it. Even though "cat" has gone on to mean much more to you... tiger, cat5 cable, Kats, etc... you still had it mapped in the very beginning.

Usually, we get so much input that the one or two examples stored in our brain initially get SWAMPED by the thousands of examples we get later.

We get very few examples of love, and so each stays with us-- but especially the first because it's the cornerstone of our definition and the starting place of our map.

Answer 9

ol' What's her name put a spell on me!

Seriously, because it was the first. It was new, you never made yourself as vulnerable before and wanted to. Scientific or biological, I can't say.

There is nothing scientific about love/lust.

Divorce can be attributed to the fact that when we have our first experience, we often lose our inhibitions and try wild and crazy stuff. We are more attracted tot he experience than the person, but mentally we don't separate the two.

I hope that helped.

WOO

Answer 10

Probably because the first time you "fall in love" it feels so magical. It is an experience you never forget in your life. I still remember the first girl I had a serious crush on when I was in 6th grade.