I am a Ph.d student. I have good hygene, I wear decent clothes, and I am very respectful of people. I have to be in group discussion with this "clique" of 5 other doctoral students who REFUSE to look at me when I speak. When I talk, they look at the floor, the wall, or their watch or leave to the bathroom. I noticed thatI get IGNORED and nobody talks to me no matter how friendly I am. They REFUSE to even say hello to me. I am the new person and nobody wants to give me the chance to know me. The only time I saw one of them look at me , is when he scowled and glared at me for 3 seconds. Why do they ignore and snub me for no reason? I am new in this class and everyone else knows each other. But still, I am treated as if I am INVISIBLE and it really bothers me that they REFUSE to look at me when I speak or when they speak. Any reasons why if I look and act like a normal person?
2007-01-31 14:15:57 · 12 answers · asked by TiredofIdiots 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I give them the courteousy and respect when they speak even though they are all rude to me.
2007-01-31 14:17:56 · update #1
I am not looking to make friends. I just want a little respect and a little courteousy. They way they treat me it's as if I am invisible or they are too superior to speak or look at me.
2007-01-31 14:22:05 · update #2
Why? Because the average person on the street is an inconsiderate prick. Sad but true. The fact that these people are in a doctoral program doesn't make any difference. Having a Ph.D. doesn't mean you're not an a$$hole; trust me, I know a lot of them.
2007-01-31 14:27:54 · answer #1 · answered by The Man In The Box 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure you look and act like a "normal" person? What's normal 4 u may not be the "norm". On the other hand, are u considering ALL the facts and being honest w/urself? Are u a Jewess in an Arab University? Or something similar? Do you try to talk too much, or do u yhink ur better than everyone else? There's something not quite right about ur question, but u've not provided enuff data 4 me to tell...
2007-01-31 22:29:37 · answer #2 · answered by nomutilation4me 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There must be something great about you. Do you lie to your self? If you don't, I think this could account for it. You may be touching the ethical ceiling and have no idea you are doing it. It takes only one point to cause this. Too bad, there is nothing you can do about it.
Maybe if you practice saying something that has no meaning at all. You know, something that is OK to say but has no implications for anyone or anything. It hard to do. I've seen executives walk into a conference room and speak for two minutes without saying one meaningful word and slay the room. Good luck!
2007-01-31 22:24:42 · answer #3 · answered by Ron H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
social groups can be quite arbitrary
i never really understood how much so, until i worked as a consultant
i had pretty much a consistent attitude and demeanor, worked hard, smart, respectfull and tried to mind my own business
some places thought i was the greatest thing since sliced bread. other places absolutely hated my guts. other places i just got along ok
if you've gotten along other places, it may be just this group
just do your best toward your work, and be businesslike
maybe things will improve, and maybe they wont
but if you'v gotten along elsewhere, odds are you will get along with the next group better, and you just have to tough this group out
2007-01-31 22:36:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As for me, Iearned the true meaning of PHD several years ago and it is absolute.. PHD..Poor happless dumb A_s.. Not one of those have any idea as to what is reality or how to apply it..If you want to be like those then try to be as stupid as they are, otherwise just let them be stupid and happless..you sound as though you may actually be human..if are, then let your humanity show up at the next meeting.. just listen to them and then laugh.. and I mean LAUGH..you don't have to make yourself laugh because if you look at them and see them as the absurd dumb a_ses that they are, and listen to their absurdities then you will laugh automatically.. Laughter is something that they cannot deny.. when you laugh at them..their own stupid egotistical psych will be threatened and they will want to know why you are laughing... when they ask you why you are laughing just tell them that something you read predicted what they would do if you laughed and that you would be courious about it because you are in deed a PHD.. laugh your head off and watch them...everytime you see one of them alone or anytime you encounter them..laugh and keep laughing.. in about a week you will own them...laughter is the best medicine..check it out.. and see for yourself..good luck
2007-01-31 23:05:49 · answer #5 · answered by J. W. H 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow sounds like they need to grow up. Just keep showing respect them no matter hard it may be. That will prove even more that you are the better person.
2007-01-31 22:19:33 · answer #6 · answered by Luekas 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't know why, but the way to cure it, is to practice before class a few things you wish to say, then break in and say them...and keep doing this.
2007-01-31 22:19:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just worry about yourself, and prove to everyone that you can succeed. Maybe you have too high expectations when it comes to friends, and its more your problem then thiers.
2007-01-31 22:19:49 · answer #8 · answered by danielschmidt94521 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe it's because you're new and they're not used to you. if you're the only woman that could be a the reason too. Or maybe they're intimidated by you.
2007-01-31 22:19:06 · answer #9 · answered by vsuper15 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You might want to change your wardrobe.Show up in a tight skirt,fishnet stockings,heels.....If nothing else,the guys will pay you attention(=
2007-01-31 22:26:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋