Everyone always argues that it is better for children to be with happily divorced parents than unhappy parents, but this comes from the parents. I would like to hear from children of divorced parents if they believe divorce is a better option when parents do not get along and specially of there is some form of abuse towards on of the parents.
2007-01-31 14:00:44 · 9 answers · asked by M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh yes I am much happier that my parents are divorced. I love my parents, and wouldn't want them to be unhappy together.
2007-01-31 15:53:47 · answer #1 · answered by Love,life,live 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes my parents divorced, and even though now I say that I think it was the right choice for both of them. I didn't necessarily think so at the time. My dad was a very controlling person, and after they sold our family home and mum bought a new house they decided to date. This eventually broke up when they had a huge fight and mum scrathed my father across the face and Dad was smaking my mums head aggainst the wall. I think I really came to realise that it wasn't right when I actually had to break it up and take the phone out of my mothers hand when she was calling the police and begged for dad to just leave.
I think the effect on children has much in the way the divorce is handled by the parents. I takes a big person and parent to remain neutral towards their ex for the sake of the children. Children realise alot more than parents give them credit for, they know when their parents are unhappy and they know what causes it.
I think from my situation it was a bit easier for the simple fact that my Dad scared me a bit and that by my parent breaking up it meant he wasn't there all the time. However, in a general note i think the kids attitude will really depend on firstly their age, secondly how the parent talk and treat each other. I think that is important that the parents are honest with the kids (within reason) becasue older kids can be resentful if they know they are not being told the truth. And lastly I think its they was the parents are after the divorce, if nothing is lacking (like love, spending time together etc) and each parent is happier (maybe not immediately) then the kids realise this and will feel the happier for it.
Being in an unhappy realtionship not only affects the parents but also the kids. If one parent is putting up with behaviour that they shouldn't be, the kids learn from this. Parents are the biggest teachers in life and it is seriously a case of monkey see... monkey do. If you are the parent in this scenario, make a change whatever that needs to be becasue your children may later loose respect for you putting up with this behaviour, or even worse learn that they are allowed to treat people that way or should be treated like that. Good luck I hope that helps.
2007-01-31 14:21:28 · answer #2 · answered by Miz_Jasmine 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm much happier with divorced parents! And there was no abuse in my parents marriage, just an adulterous father! Just because a couple is still married, does not mean their children will grow up any happier or more well adjusted! My parents divorced when I was younger and I find that I'm far more independent then my friends whose parents are still together!
2007-01-31 14:19:13 · answer #3 · answered by cwiggles17 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my parents divorced when I was young and for a long time I didnt understand it and wanted them to get back together so I could see my dad everyday as well as my mum but when I got older and more aware of stuff like this I realised that I am gla that my parents split up rather than staying together just because of me... I would rather my parents live in seperate houses and live seperate lives tha be together and constantly fighting because thats what damages kids... And if there is abuse going on (as you asked) then it is definately for the better, because no kid wants to grow up seeing their mother being abused by their father.... Thats damage for life and it isnt good....
2007-01-31 14:17:21 · answer #4 · answered by buttafly_biattch 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say divorce is better then staying together for the sake of the kids especially when they do not get along and or abuse is involved. My parents stayed together till me and my two sisters left home for "our" sake then divorced...I truly wish they would have divorced early on because our lives were hell.
2007-01-31 14:44:55 · answer #5 · answered by chemky1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly... No. I mean, I was fairly young when they divorced so I got a while to get used to it. It is very hard because when I'm with my mom I miss my dad and when I'm with my dad I miss my mom. Plus, my dad remarried and the fact of the matter is no matter how great the stepparent is, there will always be some amount of resentment from the child.
2015-06-19 07:00:50 · answer #6 · answered by katelyn 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents aren't divorced, but I desperately want them to be. I hate my dad more than anything else. So if they divorce I would definitely be happy. They don't get along and my siblings and I don't get along with my dad. So we'd all be happier.
2014-11-22 13:10:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, in my case there was abuse, but we never knew about it till my sister and I were much older. Looking back I can say that I'm glad they stuck it out, but I also knew that we were all miserable too.
That's too tough for me to really answer I guess. I am what I am now because my mom was one tough woman, so I guess I'm glad she stayed.
2007-01-31 14:13:41 · answer #8 · answered by stratplayer1967 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i hate my life either way.my 'rents split 2 years ago when i was 13 but i dont really care any more. my life sucked when they were together, my life sucks when they are divorced. maybe its just my parents
2007-01-31 14:32:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋