Have you been just "dropped" or abandoned by someone important in your life? Whether it was a parent, friend, or significant other? It amazes me that some of them try to come back and they think they can just have that spot back in your life. What do you say to someone that hurts you so badly, and leaves you behind like you don't matter anymore.. when they show up at your door asking for forgiveness? I'm talking months or YEARS later. I think of it as "too little, too late", and why would I trust them again? What is your opinion on a situation like this. I just think that giving them the satisfaction of forgiveness just enables them. I think people like that are cowards and can live with their shame on their own, and shouldn't bother trying to get the load of their shoulders by saying they're sorry years later. I think at that point, it's more for them, then for the abandoned one. I mean, I can forgive, but I really can't forget the pain that was caused by the person. And you???
2007-01-31 12:09:52 · 11 answers · asked by catchernkeeper 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A person can forgive as you have done, but when a loved
one abandones another then that can't be forgotten. You
already went through your hurt and pain and recovered
from it and I'm sure have gone on with your life: you do
not want nor need another interruption in your life so for
your sake it's best to leave things the way it is: Life is
short and for someone to take some of it away is not
worth being with that person again especially for so long.
You as a person has to make up your mind but I am sure
your bad experience will have trained you well, so con-
tinue to move forward in life and don't let any one stop
you.
2007-01-31 13:40:09 · answer #1 · answered by RudiA 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
truthfully, I think that some people do change, but not very many. My father and I had a terrible relationship when I was a kid, when I went through a divorce, he returned and really helped me out alot. He and I both made mistakes in our lives, but he is my dad and I do love him. It is unfortunate that this happens so often.
On the other side of th coin, some people can hold hatred for a very long time over another persons mistakes and the hurt that was caused. It is better to not hold onto the hate and anger. Overcoming a sad situation like this is very difficult, BUT, I know from personal experience that if the work and honesty are put in from both sides, the new relationship will be very solid and much more mature.
2007-01-31 12:40:17 · answer #2 · answered by stratplayer1967 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
after one has been abandoned, hurt, i do not see a reason for the person to ever come back around, or be sorry, most of the time they just want to get back with the person, when the person they left with doesn't work out, only then do they remember their ex and only than do they see a mistake might have been made, but too late to do anything about it, let them get their forgiveness from god, but they should stay away from the one they hurt, and not cause that person any more hurt.
2007-01-31 12:20:50 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, I think some people grow up and are truthfully sorry for what they did and they try to get back in the peoples lives because thats what they think that person wants or needs....its up to the person whether you want to forgive and start some kind of realtionship or whether you want them just to stay away. i have been in this situation and forgave someone very close to me for walking away for years and now things are so great with us I am glad I could be the bigger person.
2007-01-31 13:02:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend like this, its unfortunate. We will be really close for months and then all of a sudden she doesn't answer her phone or messages for three or four months....when we do talk again she always says, I am so sorry I have been so busy. I feel like saying to her "Everyones busy, we all have things to do...." to just drop someone and then think everything is going to be fine....is just plain selfish! When she is going through a crisis, she wants everyone to be there for her.
2007-01-31 12:23:01 · answer #5 · answered by veronica c 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell them to keep walking down the road. I have no use for people that use to be in my life but for one reason or another are not.
2007-01-31 12:13:49 · answer #6 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you 100%! I can forgive them, but I would never let them back in my life!
2007-01-31 13:46:58 · answer #7 · answered by Tigger 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive them, but the relationship has definetly changed for you, and you let them know what it is you can give and can't give, and if they can't live with that, there's nothing else you can do.
2007-01-31 12:19:49 · answer #8 · answered by Marsha B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unless you want to hurt all over again the best thing to do is tell them your doing fine with out them and you want to keep it that way so the best thing they can do is keep on walking...
2007-01-31 12:21:58 · answer #9 · answered by GEN-GEN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you answered your own question and it looks like you want support and reassurance to be able to continue rejecting them.
well keep it up!
2007-01-31 18:01:05 · answer #10 · answered by j_mang 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋